Welcome to Gaia! ::

Ooh, Leav, I'm excited already!

Had to to graduate. I think I'll edit it this week, and post Friday, Saturday, and Sunday installments. Would that be too much to handle? It's pretty...thick.
-LD

Ha, it's already Spring here, practically.

Yeah, just some editing. I think I might pace it so that the epilogue falls right after the Chinese New Year.
-LD

Oooooo, I saw snow once... It was awesome. My brother and I tried to make a snowman, but we didn't know how to so it turned out to be, like, a snow blob with arms. Still fun though, even when I slipped on a patch of ice and got a huge bruse on my bum.

I just don't like cold weather. Period.

(Psst! Check out Locker Room Discrepancies!)
-LD

Lea, I know you called me the other night, and I am very sorry I didn't call you back... I didn't check my messages until this morning, mainly because I spent all of yesterday passing in and out of sleep with this adorable kid I met at the rave Thursday night after work.
Only now I'm kind of confused, and I feel a little weird. I'll just copy my LJ entry.

Ok. So Thursday night Minion rented The Foundation downtown and we had a little rave thing. By the end of the night, there was just this small group of us left. It was like, Me and my brother, Rob the sponsor/our friend, Jesse who introduced us to Rob on New Years, Minion, Phil who I've hung out with once or twice before, and Andrew, who I think with the exception of my brother was the youngest person there, being that he is sixteen. Jay showed up as we were leaving.

So I spent the better part of the evening tooling around and smoking with Phil, because Phil is cool, and I haven't hung out with him in a long time. We took a walk, got back, and outside was standing Andrew, who I hadn't met previously. The three of us stood outside and smoked a bit, then we went in, and they were dancing, but I stayed off the floor to rest my legs from all the walking I had done with Phil, considering I was wearing heel's.

At the beginning of the night, I did dance. Someone gave me glow sticks, and I ended up dancing a bit with Rob, which was fun, and then on my own a little, and after a while I went and sat down and that was that, because shortly after I went walking with Phil. Once I got back into the club, taking into consideration the fact that I had worked six hours doing cash before getting to the club, danced once I got there, went for a walk, and then stood outside with Phil and Andrew for about twenty minutes smoking and chatting... I figured I had a right to sit for a little. I was watching everyone, and then Andrew comes over, grabs my hands, and drags me onto the dance floor. But, by this point, it was just the small group of us, and there was a lot of unused space on the floor. The minute he grabbed me, though, I knew I was screwed. Because while I don't normally get this way, I've begun to fall for this kid.

Here is the dilemma. I know that he's mature, and he's really kind, and I enjoy being around him. I also know his birthday is the day before mine, which is why we connected on the level we connected on. But I still think of him as a kid, because he's three years younger than me, almost to the day. He's my brothers age, besides, and for that its almost (not really, but bordering on) creepy.

Now, the reason I do know the things I've found out is because he had been kicked out of his house, and was going to sleep in a laundromat. Now, I'm a caring person, I don't like to let people do stuff like that, if I can help it. I probably shouldn't have brought him back here, but I did. And if I had my own place, I would do stuff like that far more often. Which is probably not a good idea. Essentially, my place would be the one place where my friends would always be welcome to spend the night, any night, for as many nights as they need. Which is what I was willing to do here for Andrew. He went home last night around six thirty, after adding me on facebook, and promising to message me his number as soon as he found his phone (which he believes he left at school). Oh, there's another thing. He's still in high school; I'd have graduated by now if I'd attended, but I didn't.

I mean, its not that this whole thing feels wrong, its just that for some reason I think its weird that I've connected with this kid like this, even though I usually (and by usually I mean always, even with girls) go for someone older, rather than allowing myself someone younger. Mainly because younger usually means less mature, not always physically, but usually mentally, and that is what bothers me most about people in general. The fact that they are mentally immature. But that might be what it is about this kid, the fact that, if he hadn't told me (which I'm glad he did) that he was still sixteen, I wouldn't have been able to guess it on my own. No way, no how. Except maybe by the acne, but thats not a big deal. Never has been; even I still have breakouts now and again, and I'm twenty on July tenth (making Andrew's birthday the ninth, obviously, at which point he will turn seventeen).

But all in all, I don't think the timing for this rave could have been better. I haven't had that much fun in ages, and not to mention seeing all the people who I know, but I don't get to see as often as I want, was really great. I mean, I walked up to the door and I was hugged by people I don't think I even know, even now, but I still hugged them back. And why? Because that is the spirit of the community, that is how raver's roll.

You know what, too? A lot of people are under the misconception that ravers take E. This is wrong, because while I ran into one or two acid heads, and snuck out to smoke a bowl with Jesse, Phil, Ben, and this other girl who's name I don't remember (but I think it was Ayla), I didn't run into a single people who was on, or advocated the use of, E. And that made the sense of community stronger, because we were really all there for the music, the dancing, the fun, the fellowship. And the small group out for pizza at one in the morning afterwards didn't hurt, either.

Ooh, I love you so much, dear! Thats just... Of course I believe in fate. Some things are just meant to happen, and they do. And when they do, its just so... Wonderful, generally.

And thank you, as well. I'm always thankful for having met you, you're one of my best friends, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Thank you for returning my advice. I know I always have good advice, but like Alice from Alice in Wonderland, I never take my own advice. Which is bad, because I know what I am talking about. Heh.

The thing is, there are moments where I feel like a mother rather than a lover, and that is what is making me feel weird. Like, I know he is still growing, and I can't wait to see how he looks all grown up, because frankly, he's such a cutie. (*coughclickmecough*] But it mainly is because he IS still a kid, and he IS still growing, and I know that, and I want to watch him grow, and in that way I feel more like a mother, but that is so totally not the nature of the relationship.

But yeah. Thank you for being really, really awesome.

Aww, thats kind of cute... How odd, though, that we're both falling for someone younger.

That is also part of what is weird, though... Saying "boy" in regards to someone I like, when every guy I've liked prior has been old enough to be called a "man."

Oh, did you click the clickme though? <3