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 Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2012 9:19 pm
Not sure to quote you or to put him back up on the approved waiting list but here's a go. lD
Sorry if this is wrong. but I updated him C:
Thanks you for looking at him C:
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Posted: Wed Aug 15, 2012 10:46 pm
Congratulations on the art, your senshi is cute. Very bright and cheerful looking.
I have a few things I'd like to point out, dealing with powers.
Quoting from the thread on Sailor factions, about Chibi's for part of this:
Chibi senshi powers are weaker than those of their adult counterparts. Remember that chibi senshi are technically in training. They are not full-fledged senshi and even at Eternal they are barely stronger than a Super of advanced age.
That being said and taking into account how long most senshi attacks last I think three minutes for an attack, even an eternal attack, is a bit long. I mean this is a chibi, a little kid, and even if he's eternal I'd think if most of the full fledged senshi as eternals don't have an attack lasting that long that a chibi shouldn't, it wouldn't make sense to me.
The other two attacks I think could use a little tweaking, but that's just me. A chibi is a chibi and so weaker than a full fledged super senshi, when the chibi is at eternal. I think pushing back a nega, especially if it's a General king or a general would be a bit much for a small child to do, especially five and ten feet. It just seems a bit over powered for a chibi to me. Other wise I like the idea of the attack.
For the eternal attack it gives them a boost but in what, speed, stamina, strength?
The only other question I have is that you say he'll happy 99.9% of the time. I just wanna know how that'll jive with his age if he's in a battle and people are bleeding and dying around him. How will it effect him being so happy, what will he think and do and such.
Also, I'm gonna toss in two quotes from another thread. I'll toss the link in at the bottom.
Attacks need to have SPECIFIC USAGE LIMITS. This includes how long it lasts (either instantaneous, or with a fixed duration), who can be affected (number of targets, or area of effect) and how many times it can be used in a fight. If an attack conveys a more significant advantage to the senshi, then it should have a shorter duration, fewer targets, etc.
and
Please keep in mind that battles tend to last about 5 minutes ICly. Attack durations should be mindful of this! No magic should be able to last for large proportions of the battle!
So I'd also suggest maybe adding in how many times he can use each attack perhaps. And the above is also why I suggest the three minutes being a bit long. It's more than half the five minute idea, and him being a chibi a battle I imagine would be fairly fast for him. So I think an attack lasting more than half the length of a battle might be a bit much.
Links: Just so you can see where I grabbed the quotes from.
http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?t=22537231
]http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?t=22314811I did take a glance over the hobbies, I think it's cute. I remember when I was a child I hated being indoors as well. So I like that, especially now a days with so many kids indoors and liking it. I think it's a good thing. The virtues and flaws I like as well.
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Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2012 12:06 pm
Thank you so much Sleet for the information!
I updated his attacks! :3
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Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2012 3:45 am
One last thing. So I decided to change his age, been thinking about this for awhile actually. How I wanted to play him, he needs to be a younger age and I thought age nine would be good for him.
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Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 9:08 am
bunnyilove One last thing. So I decided to change his age, been thinking about this for awhile actually. How I wanted to play him, he needs to be a younger age and I thought age nine would be good for him. I'm actually pretty glad you did this. heart The quest reads as a VERY young character, I could actually see him fitting the very youngest a senshi could be (7) but 9 is alright too if that's what you want to go with. He can just be a little immature for his age. Anyway It looks like the flaws have been updated pretty nicely, but I'm still going to need you to fix up small conflict that Akina mentioned between Brave and Confident before I can stamp this.
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Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 9:16 am
I'm glad you said that. I really wanted him to be around 6 or 7 but I wasn't sure if he was allowed to be that young so I guess I can change it now
And Oki doki! I'll get to work on that right after class!
Thanks so much! C:
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Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 6:26 pm
Iris_virus I'm actually pretty glad you did this. heart The quest reads as a VERY young character, I could actually see him fitting the very youngest a senshi could be (7) but 9 is alright too if that's what you want to go with. He can just be a little immature for his age. Anyway It looks like the flaws have been updated pretty nicely, but I'm still going to need you to fix up small conflict that Akina mentioned between Brave and Confident before I can stamp this.
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Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2012 9:21 pm
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