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 Posted: Sun Mar 13, 2011 12:23 pm
(After A clean slate. Claire's perspective of this encounter can be viewed here.)Can't protect a damned thing.Lucas moved through the halls with his gaze on the floor, his hands in his pockets, and his distinct cheer once more completely missing from his demeanor. The conversation he had shared with Aulus remained fresh in his mind, troubling his thoughts with nagging persistence. He had made a grievous error in allowing himself to become so attached to Claire's presence. Christy lost her patience and consciously removed herself from his life. Liselle grew to be deeply fearful and closed herself off from him. Jessica used, deceived, and abandoned him. Morrison withheld secrets and disappeared without a word. Elissa suddenly cut all contact and transferred away. That was Lucas's record of intimate relationships, be they romantic or platonic. It was a pattern that had emerged over decades and one that he couldn't simply ignore. It was an indication that guided his interactions for nearly a decade: All relationships faded into hate and fear. If this was the case, it was best to never form close bonds with any individual. These were the thoughts that filled Lucas's mind when a certain dark-haired woman appeared before him, offering a smile, a wave, and a "Hey Lucas, how're you feeling?" s**t. He regarded her with an obvious hesitance, half-turning in the opposite direction. "Ah..." It figured that she would show up now, of all times. Not that any other time would be any better. He needed an escape. "Hey. Fine. Look, I'm actually really busy, so..." It was a tired line, perhaps even a cliche, but perhaps its common use indicated its effectiveness. "Oh, all right." A certain expression crossed her face, a momentary furrowing of her brow. It appeared, however, that she by and large bought the act. "I'll see you some other time, then?" s**t. He opened his mouth to reply, closed it again, pressed his lips together, narrowed his eyes, then, "Yeah. See you." Moving briskly, he turned to leave. This would be harder than he had anticipated...
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Posted: Mon Mar 14, 2011 6:39 pm
(Several days after the previous solo. Claire's perspective of this encounter can be viewed here.)Only hurt and destroy.He needed a distraction, something meaningful to do with his thoughts. He decided that Liselle and Snow, both newly-evolved, could use a little training. The Charmander had taken on a new form after its valiant charge against Lance's red Gyarados, and though he was weak against water, Liselle was timid, careful, and gentle. In short, they would prove an even match for one another. Lucas entered the pokemon gym absently and, noting the familiar dark-haired woman within, promptly turned to leave again. There were other gyms. One of them was bound to be unoccupied, or at least occupied with less... intolerable company. Ugh, he really had become far too attached. "Lucas, what's up? I haven't seen you around too much lately..." He froze. There was a good reason she hadn't seen him around much. He was purposefully avoiding her, and the fact that she noted it only as a decreased presence meant he was doing a damned good job of it. "Sorry," he deflected. He didn't spare as much as a glance over his shoulder. He didn't want to see her face now. He only needed to keep on as he was. "I just remembered something I need to do." "Oh..." She sounded disappointed. "All right... Later." He wanted to apologize, to explain, but it was impossible. She would just lecture him for reading too much into the circumstances. She couldn't understand, even if she tried. The door creaked shut behind him.
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Posted: Tue Mar 15, 2011 11:34 pm
(A few days after the previous solo. Claire's perspective of this encounter can be viewed here.)Betray.What had begun as a harrowing task was becoming more and more innate as time progressed. When engaged in conversation, he responded with his usual friendly demeanor and his characteristic charming grin, though the expressions were as empty as the day he had first donned them years prior. He completed his duties - limited as they were - with a detached smile that kept those around him at arm's length. All the negative thoughts and memories that had begun to emerge since he had first opened his emotions to Claire dissolved into a lukewarm disaffectedness. It was a lonelier existence than he remembered it, but it was necessary. It had been necessary when he was a member of Team Galactic as well. His only regret was that he hadn't figured that out until so late in his career. Such thoughts couldn't have been further from his mind as Lucas sat in the cafeteria, one hand leafing to the next page in a weapons manual while the other held a fork that was idly pushed across a plate of fried rice. The nearing sound of footsteps caught his attention, and a brief inclination of his gaze indicated that he detected Claire's approach. "Hello," she offered, though her tone was a bit hesitant. "How've you been lately?" Nearly simultaneously, he began sorting his things in preparation to leave. Didn't she get it yet? Arceus, what was left but to outright say that he didn't want to talk to her anymore? "Fine," he responded, pushing a considerable coldness into his words. Claire was a smart girl. She had to get the hint eventually. "Busy." With that, he gathered his book and his plate, offering no farewell as he suddenly stood and proceeded towards the exit. "...Oh." Push her back, increase the distance, avoid all sorts of pain in the future. On paper, it looked seamless, flawless, and simple. In practice, however, it was quite the opposite. But it was necessary.
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Posted: Mon Mar 21, 2011 10:37 am
(Some few days after the previous solo. Claire's perspective of this encounter can be viewed here.)Someday you'll hate me too.He vaguely remembered a conversation he had with Claire once in the past. She had offered him asylum in a moment of uncertainty, and he had rejected it fiercely. Kindness was fleeting, no matter how sincere the source. All gentleness would dissolve into fear or anger, sometimes both. Someday she would hate him too. He rounded a corner in the halls, his path bringing him face to face with the object of his consideration. He stopped just short of collision, recoiling a step with brow furrowed. Appearing where she was least expected and pushing into matters where she was least wanted: This was Claire's gift. Or perhaps - and more likely - this was the fate of two people who worked and lived together in the same building. It gave him more assurance, however, to think of her as a meddler who was prying into places in which she had no place. It was morally easier to expel a Rattata than it was to do the same of a Growlithe. "Lucas," she said. She opened her mouth to speak but seemed to think better of it, frowning and drawing up a hand to fumble with her hair. Her gaze drifted to the floor. The named wouldn't spare his company any similar attempts at conversation. With a light sigh, he wordlessly swerved around her to continue on his path. He had no time for hesitation or indecision. He had no time for the triviality of friends. He had no time for Claire. His passing seemed to steel her resolve, and a voice called after his departure, "Lucas, wait! What's wrong? Why are... What did I do?" He stopped but did not turn to meet her gaze. What did she do? How about what didn't she do, and why didn't she realize it? Why couldn't she remember the same conversation he had? Why didn't she understand how much better off they would be if they cut ties? He toyed with the idea of responding to her words, but he soberly recognized that he would only end up raising his voice unnecessarily. She would see his hand raise to his face to rub at weary eyes, might even hear the heavy sigh he exhaled in exasperation, perhaps even in regret. With this as his only reply, he continued down the hall. He knew she would hate him someday. Destruction and betrayal were his only infallible talents. He simply hadn't expected to bring about that someday with his own actions.
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