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Ok. Normally I wouldn't do this, because I would feel soooo damn stupid, because some of what I believe to be my past lives just read out like bad angsty anime... But if anyone was interested in hearing about it, I don't think I would mind telling about it. I can even write out what I know just like a story, so anyone who believes me can hear a basic record, and those who don't could have something perhaps interesting to read. So anyone interested, let me know, I'll start writing. Oh, and please, anyone else, contribute to this thread, I don't want it to die.

Sure. I'd be up for reading about that past life o' yours, Josh.

You could have made a mistake in the url. Or you have a browser jacker virus/cookie or something. *shrug*

Yay lobo, you're finally realizing some things require more evidence than anecdote or feeling!

who's sam again?

what a strange person

Hmm, well this is a nice thread but it seems that there are a lot of people that are too afraid of just coming out of the closet (lol) and expressing things.

Ok, I'll start from the beginning.

I was born and raised a Jehovah's Witness, of which is really the only religion I "hate". These are people who call those who can manage to think for themselves "apostates". These are people who threatened my grandparents that they would be "dis-fellowshipped" (excommunicated) for talking on the phone with their son who was dis-fellowshipped". Sickening, in my opinion.

Well, to get back on track...one day I was at the "Kingdom Hall"(church) and the speaker (preacher) was telling us a story about how a man once knew the names of all of the demons and spoke to them and performed magick and then the demons started tormenting him and wouldn't stop till the day the man "found Jehovah" and became a JW.

Now, this little talk did the opposite that it was meant too, instead of strengthening my faith in their god, my faith in humanity was lowered in that this man had to rely on a higher power than himself to protect himself. Once again, I was sickened. I had already been practicing energy manipulation (and have since I was 10 years old), but had no clue what it was called or what I was really doing, it all came naturally to me.

I got home that day, got online, started researching demonology and Magick. What I found was bullshit, but it opened a window for me, led me to legit resources where I started learning more and more. I finally figured out what it was that I had been doing, learned more and more about energy manipulation and started practicing more.

About the age of 13 I was always feeling sick and weak, and when I drained energy from things I felt better. So, at this time I started researching what this meant, came across things that made me think I may be a "psi vampire". This was true in a sense, as I later learned; I had started to go through my long awakening and this caused trauma to my soul, damages to it, to where it was leaking energy. Imagine it like a tire with a slit cut in it, slowly leaking air, you could refill it but it would still, eventually, become flat again.

Passing a few years of going through hell, I had reached a new point in my awakening, I believe when I was about halfway through my 16th year, but I could be wrong. At this point, I was feeling a new, "divine", form of energy, and had started to manifest energy constructs of wings on my back. My only explanation for this is a quote I once found online:

"There is very little difference between an angel and deity of Egypt"

I'm kind of skipping ahead of myself, so I'll just end that part with that, at this point I thought I was angelkin, and this new "divine" energy had healed the damage to my soul; Draining energy was no longer needed.

About a year ago I started to reach a new stage in my awakening where this divine energy became stronger, strange dreams started to flood my sleep and dreams of a beautiful woman of which gave me an indescribable feeling in the dream. I believe that this was my Spirit guide, who I later learned the name of, she was "Pero". She was sent to my by the Goddess Bast of whom I have worshiped and spoken too for quite a while now. Yes, another "fluffy" or down-right "crazy" aspect of myself, I literally "spoke" to deities and heard their replies. I did not hear them with my ears, or in my head, I heard, or should I say, felt them speak to my heart.

I had always felt such an amazing connection to Bast, and during my search for the final pieces to my puzzle I had the random thought, "I wonder if Bast had a son?". So I did the research, she did. His name was Maahes, and every single aspect of Maahes fit me in every way, it was like reading something a friend wrote about me, somebody who knew me so well and could define me perfectly. I asked Bast if this is who I am, and she would not give me an answer, neither would Pero. They simply continued to tell me that, if I managed to learn the answer myself, completely, they would verify it to me.

Thats basically it, a little after that I learned that, well, I "believe" that I am the physical incarnation or "avatar" of the Kemetic leonide war-god; Maahes.

Just recently, a few months ago really is all I think. Yagi found somebody on deviantart with the name "Heru-Set-Sebek" and thought I might be interested in speaking too her. Turns out this strangely random meeting was with a daughter of Bast, a therian, not a Goddess.

Now, if I can basically spell out the majority of my life, tell you that I believe myself to be an incarnated God...I think you others can tell your secrets and not be worried of being criticized for it.

Just a final note, I believe I'm here for a reason, a reason for myself, I'm not "special" or some "savior". I'm here for a reason just like anybody is here for a reason. I'm here to live (which is also the meaning of life lol, that and 42 of course respectively) and learn what it's like to be human and have to deal with the weight of a human heart.


Strange ending quote time...with a quote from an anime of all things.


"You're gonna carry that weight."

I'm just gonna have to say "America, ******** yeah" to your story, Mr. Cat, because it's badass. I have a relative who was in the JW, and got the hell out as soon as he could, because supposedly holy people argue over the stupidest things, tiny bits of favor in their church, home life, place in lunch line, ect... I don't know much, but Heaven isn't a lunch line competition.

The avatar thing is badass too, and I take you a hell of a lot more seriously, becuase you don't brag or be like "LOOK AT ME I IS SO SPECSHUL" which is good, and especially not annoying. <3