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 Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 10:19 pm
Foxmore I used a candle to help me meditate on this (I don't know if it helped or distracted me). While I was looking at the flame I just repeated "harm none" over and over again. This is what I cam up with... Never tried it with a candle, Foxmore. I think I'll give it a spin, one of these days. On your reply, I can only ask then, would you do nothing for your friend? I mean, if there is no clearly right solution, and doing nothing could hurt both of them, then could you justify doing right by your friend? Peaches Sebastian The "Reflective" Topic took me a while. I had to think back on when I told my father and during my trace, I realized that he was really very supportive. His second ex-wife was a wiccan and she was great about it until she broke the first and most important rule. She began doing hurtful things to the people around her. I'm unhappy to say that we couldn't help her and she is no longer part of my family, though I do hope she sees herself one day. In any case I don't regret telling my father cause now he knows why I don't open up to my mother. She's not very friendly of open-minded about most things. He's there if I need to talk to someone about it and he's there when I need help. I'm glad to have told him. Which brings me back to my Mother. Why can't I tell her? I sat for a while thinking about this and it's still unclear to me. I know that she wont hate me, yet I can't come out and tell her. I think she might know already, but still I say nothing of it. No matter what she says I know that she wont be angry with me and I wont be swayed from my beliefs, but still nothing. I simply think that I'm trapped in this little box and she has to open it. I hope one day she finds out that I'm in there. Ah, but you have the power to open that box yourself, if you could only find the courage. In fact, don't you think that she, as your mother, has the right to know her child? Or do you think you're protecting her from something? The only bottom line here is "Be careful". You don't want her "finding out". You don't want to tell her in a way that could hurt her. So be very, very careful. Choir-Angel Yeek! I haven't done the assignment yet, but I promise I will by the end of the week. I've just started school, so today's been pretty hectic. I've been busy and people are really upsetting me...This poor tree outside, the neighbors have gouged out chunks of it with an axe and tore off most of its bark...I cried over this. Can't they understand that even a tree has a life force? They're so ignorant and it upsets me terribly...I live in an awful neighborhood filled with druggies, um...uncouth ladies, and people that randomly jump out of their car and try to beat up your boyfriend... icon_gonk.gif Yea...This one scared me... *sigh* I promise to have this done soon though. In fact, I'm looking forward to it...^_^ Well I'm glad for that! biggrin 3nodding Yeah.... I just started school today, actually, so I"m going to get off Gaia now. But I do hope you'll reply! Oh, and to everyone: feel free to comment on other people's posts if you have something to contribute! I mean, this is a discussion as well, not just a class!Love and Vale. ~Leavaros Dapple
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 12:31 am
Leavaros Ah, but you have the power to open that box yourself, if you could only find the courage. In fact, don't you think that she, as your mother, has the right to know her child? Or do you think you're protecting her from something? The only bottom line here is "Be careful". You don't want her "finding out". You don't want to tell her in a way that could hurt her. So be very, very careful. See but the thing is I don't really know my mother all that well. She was there for me nearly all my life yes, but she didn't raise me. I feel that even if we are in the same room we're still separate. I want her to open up more, I've tired. I share things with her and she blows me off. I'm stuck and that's why I feel trapped in the box....I really don't know what to do.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 12:54 am
That's her loss, Peaches. Unfortunately, it also makes it your loss too, since she is your mother.
Even so, I've found that at least in my life, the less skeletons in the closet, the better I feel. And when it's something as personal and as important as one's religion, I would think that might be the top priority on one's list of things to talk about.
Love and Vale,
-LD
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 7:40 am
Damn, the reflective topic is a bit alien to me, with open minded parents who also figured out that I'm gay. There were very short coming out conversations there. "You're interested in witchcraft?" "Yeah." "Do you want those books?" "What would you say if I were going out with a girl?" "I know." "Oh, thank god." Foxmore There is always gray, no matter how white it seems. I like that. I think, in most situations, intuition is the most reliable thing to listen to. Do what you think is best for yourself and those who matter to you, but don't outright harm anyone else for it. It's the best you can do. 
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 12:02 pm
Hmm...I do think that wicca is one of my top pirorities, but I do have people to talk to. People online, my friends from my old high school, my father, but none of them leave here with me so I still feel kind of alone. I have tried to open up to her, like I said, but she seems too busy.
If you were put in my shoes what would you do?
This question doesn't have to be answered by Leavaros. It could be answered by anyone. And please call me April.
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2007 8:46 pm
Leavaros Foxmore I used a candle to help me meditate on this (I don't know if it helped or distracted me). While I was looking at the flame I just repeated "harm none" over and over again. This is what I cam up with... Never tried it with a candle, Foxmore. I think I'll give it a spin, one of these days. On your reply, I can only ask then, would you do nothing for your friend? I mean, if there is no clearly right solution, and doing nothing could hurt both of them, then could you justify doing right by your friend? My last post might have been jumbled, but that was my point. Nothing you do can be completely without harm, so you do what you can, for who you can, take the nessasary precossions (think it out fully, with a clear and rational head), and hope for the best. That is all you really can do isn't it?
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Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 2:31 am
Peaches Sebastian Hmm...I do think that wicca is one of my top pirorities, but I do have people to talk to. People online, my friends from my old high school, my father, but none of them leave here with me so I still feel kind of alone. I have tried to open up to her, like I said, but she seems too busy. If you were put in my shoes what would you do? This question doesn't have to be answered by Leavaros. It could be answered by anyone. And please call me April. Honestly, April? I'd probably try to compose a speech to tell her easily, get increasingly worried, and end up just spitting it out. And what mother is too busy for her child? If she doesn't have time, you should ask her to set some aside for mother-daughter-bonding time. Shaky communication is a real problem. I have a hard time with that, too, sometimes, especially in real life. I think it's something we all have to work on. Good communication may very well be implanted in us, but we have to grow that seed for ourselves, at least, most of the time. Does that make any sense? Ciele Fu Damn, the reflective topic is a bit alien to me, with open minded parents who also figured out that I'm gay. There were very short coming out conversations there. "You're interested in witchcraft?" "Yeah." "Do you want those books?" "What would you say if I were going out with a girl?" "I know." "Oh, thank god." Lucky girl! You have one of those rare, urban legend families that is okay with letting their children be who they are. That's awesome. I can see how the reflective topic might be hard for you. Let's see what Saturday brings, hm? Love and Vale, -LD
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Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 2:57 am
Leavaros Honestly, April? I'd probably try to compose a speech to tell her easily, get increasingly worried, and end up just spitting it out. And what mother is too busy for her child? If she doesn't have time, you should ask her to set some aside for mother-daughter-bonding time. Shaky communication is a real problem. I have a hard time with that, too, sometimes, especially in real life. I think it's something we all have to work on. Good communication may very well be implanted in us, but we have to grow that seed for ourselves, at least, most of the time. Does that make any sense? Well it would make sense if my family was all happy and everything, but ya know...it's not. I started wicca because I thought it would give me a new look on life and it did. I can't talk to my mother cause she doesn't want to. That's how I ended up with my grandmother and aunt, they raised me most of my life. So yes it does make sense, but I'm afraid I cannot take your advice. I hope you understand. Edit: I hope that this doesn't seem so...."In your face!" cause I don't mean it to. I'm just having a hard time at home. Please forgive me.
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Posted: Thu Aug 23, 2007 1:31 am
Not at all! I prefer in your face posts. I find that beating around the bush misses more of what you're trying to hit, if that makes sense.
Uh....let me try that again. When you try to cover up what you really mean, what you really feel, oftentimes it's easy for others to misinterpret through courtesy and proper lines. It may not make things worse to wear a mask, but it certainly doesn't resolve anything.
Note! From now on, let's all drop this "I'm sorry if I offend", stuff. We know you're sorry if you offend, so there's no need to say it unless someone takes offense. Let's just be open and honest with one another, okay?
I think I understand what you mean.... My life has been pretty crazy, too. Especially in the last two or three years--Mama died, I came out of the closet, started my study of Love, increased my studies of magic and the realm of spirits a thousandfold, skin became more golden, fell in love (not Love, but love) for the first time, had my heart broken, everything compounded into depression, painstakingly got up and moved on, skin became even more golden, hair grew gold some, too, realized so many things, started writing again, eyes became gold in the center....
So much has changed.... So I want you to know, I'm not pushing you to come out if you aren't ready, or if the timing isn't right. But when the time comes, I hope this will lend you some of the courage to do what must be done.
Love and Vale,
-LD
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Posted: Thu Aug 23, 2007 12:32 pm
Thanks Leavaros. I think it did help...It gave me a lot to think about. Thank you very much. I await your next topics XD
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Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 8:29 am
"Thoughtful" Topic #2
To each, his own.
Less of me asking this time! Just very basic questions, good luck!
Is there such a thing as absolutism?
Does relativism have boundaries?
If so, where?
Can this saying condone uninformed opinions?
Are uninformed opinions a contradiction of this saying?
Remember to meditate first!
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Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 8:43 am
"Reflective" Topic #2 ***This one is much more clear cut than the last one, so I hope more people will participate in the reflective!*** We've all said things that we wish we could take back. Things that have hurt others, and ourselves. Sometimes, we don't even think until we already say them. Are there times when hard truth actually helps?Can we develop skills to soften these truths?How can we ease the hurt that we might have caused?Sometimes, honest feeling can make up for polished speech. How can we tell when one is needed? How can we mix the two together? Can simple feeling heal what thought cannot?Remember to meditate on the topic first! ~~~~~ We see above our first embedded topic. Interestingly enough, I myself favor the latter topic, and am working on ways that I can tell the difference. Who knows? There might be a story to be heard later this week! wink Love and Vale, -LD
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Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 10:55 am
Actually I've been meaning to talk to you. I've been having trouble meditating lately. I can't seem to focus my thoughts. Got any tips?
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Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 12:17 pm
Hmm. I actually use meditation to sharpen my focus; I don't rely on my focus to meditate. But I think I know what you mean....
Try eating a light meal, or a snack. Of course, grounding and centering always helps. If you have a lot on your mind, you could always try meditating on those things, and put off the group topics.
There is a variation of this called open meditation, but...I'm not very well-versed in it. From what I understand, you let your mind wander from topic to topic, skimming off the top of each the cream from the milk, as it were.
I don't like using it because I'm...rather averse to Receptive Meditation, which is what I fall into after meditating openly for so long.
Just sort through your thoughts, and don't try so hard that your head starts to hurt. If anyone else has suggestions, I'd love to hear them!
-LD
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Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2007 11:44 pm
Okay I found out what's trowing me off. I'm sick. lol It's trowing my whole system off. Sleep patterns, and mediation wise. Any suggestions for what should I do about helping me clearing my head?
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