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 Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2011 3:41 am
RPC Name: Kasumi Hotaru Kaguya Mist Firefly of the Kaguya Bloodline/Clan Requested: http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?page=2&t=20082725#277882100 Kaguya Clan Why do you want this Bloodline/Clan: This Bloodline is the best one for my character (i think) because my character's main focus in combat is fast,agile Taijutsu. So this graceful offensive and defensive combat Kekei Genkai is the best option for my character. It also helps to root my characters background in the land of water . What do you know about the Bloodline/Clan: The Kaguya clan have the ability to control their bones , both density and shape. Initially the clans natural ability makes their bones three times stronger than normal but the weight of the bones is the same, however, they can only use the bones in their arms and legs as they dont have the control to safely manipulate bones surrounding any vital organs. Nor can the user make anything more then the most simple objects things such as blades and whip’s are beyond them. As the ninja’s skill progresses they can acheive greater levels of control over their bones . They are able to increase the density of their bones so that they are stronger than steel and eventually even stronger than diamonds. On the same token as their skill increases they can also manipulate their bones more skillfully being able to make more complex armour and constructions that are perfectly balanced despite size and shape. Untill at the final level of control they can manipulate every bone in their body over the distance of a whole village if they want to (although this weakens the density). The most the user can extend their bones without affecting the density is 20 meters in any direction.
Please supply a Brief RP Sample: Kasumi's legs were burning there was intense pain in his left shoulder, where the kunai had struck him, and it was getting worse with every step. But he couldn't stop, it would seem he would never stop not after ... "NO mustn’t think of that" he muttered under his breath. His pursuers were close Kasumi was thinking he could almost hear them in the tree's around him when his foot struck a rock and he fell, face first, into the dirt and the darkness swallowed him. Kasumi awoke to something pounding into his stomach. He screamed in pain as another kick exploded into his stomach the force sending him flying into a nearby tree Kasumi groaned as he fell to his knee's. Laughter rang out across the clearing. It came from the three men who had killed his father and pursued him from the small village they had been staying at. "NOW ya little brat, I’m gonna stick ya ,like I did yer daddy" spat the tallest of the three pulling a sickle free from his belt. The tall man began to advance forward, the sickle held high, his eyes glinting with bloodlust. His two companions simply stood in place cackling in anticipation of another blood spectacle. "no please ... I ... I haven't done anything! PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE!!" cried Kasumi ,tears streaking down his face, the image of his father’s head rolling across the floor flashed before him. The tall man merely laughed all the harder. A warm tingling sensation spread through both his arms as Kasumi stood. I’ll die on my feet he thought ,closing his eyes, as the warm tingling spread through his chest he felt calmer, the tall man stepped closer, the warmth spread further up through his spine to his skull. His eyes snapped open "or YOU could die instead" he snarled. The bones in his arms began to feel like liquid just as the tall man stopped in front of Kasumi . " I don't think I’ll be the one that dies today kid" He whispered as the sickle flashed through the air aiming for Kasumi's neck. The fluid in Kasumi's arm's pushed out against his skin as he flung his arm up to protect his head. The clearing rang with a resounding clang and then a scream of pain Kasumi looked up to see a look of absolute horror on the tall man’s face and across the clearing one of his friends writhed in pain on the ground clutching his leg where the sickle protruded. Looking down at his arm he was astonished to see a solid bone plate extending from his wrist to his elbow. As he watched the bone plate sank back into his arm leaving no trace, as if it had never been there at all. Kasumi's face twisted into a feral grin "my turn" he whispered. The fluid in Kasumi’s arms pushed into the palms of his hand, without thinking Kasumi slammed his palms into the tall mans stomach. Kasumi didn’t even notice the warm sensation of the tall man’s blood pouring over his hands nor did he hear the scream as he wrenched the bone spikes of his Yangi No Mai out of the tall mans stomach. His mind was consumed by the image of his father’s body. The uninjured friend of the tall man screamed in horror at the sight of the blood drenched young boy with spikes slowly forming all over his arms, shaking with fear he turned and tried to flee. ”your not getting away from ME” cried Kasumi throwing out his hand, fingers outstreched. “ Teshi Sendan” the tip’s of the bones in his outstreched fingers shot forward to slam into the fleeing mans back drilling their way into his flesh. As the man collapsed to his knee’s Kasumi fired another 2 volleys of Tenshi Sendan into the man just to be sure. Kasumi turned finally to the man with the sickle in his leg . “please... I beg you ... don’t kill me” The last thing he saw were the spines of Kasumi’s Yangi no Mai smashing into his skull.
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Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2011 8:47 pm
[Lilly] [Vice Captain]
"Lilly and Jade, gearing up for the application war..."
Duo: Hm...well from the looks of it everything is in order so I'll approve it for now. Cobra might or might not have comments on this decision but for now sorry for the wait and Approved! Also bloodline may be suspended if improper use is shown in the rp.
Eijo: Much better for the info section. An overall comment, please watch your capitals. I'm finding them in random places throughout your sample while some of your dialogue don't start with any. If possible, could you maybe space out your paragraphs more? There should one line of space between each. Thoughts can also be marked. May it be with <(thought)> or with '(though)' or even italics. Just something to let readers know its a thought. You might also want to watch your grammar and sentence formations. Some of your sentences are run ons or incomplete. Take your time to rework you app and just let me know when you repost it. This will also mark your second denial so take care before posting your third attempt. Good luck.
bb: Sorry for the delay. Internet wasn't working properly. Anyhow, onto your app.
For the info section, please try to incorporate more of what is written in our bloodline than just your generic knowledge of the bloodline. Things you could include are some rules and the chakra drain incorporated into the dojutsu. Great rp sample. I really love how you incorporated the time scheme into it. My only problem is that none of the Hyuuga techniques were really used aside from the eye abilities. If you could, explaining the vision of a person though the Byakugan would be cool too. Overall, a good first try. Let me know when you're ready for round two. Good luck.
"...It's a never ending battle out there."
[Jade] [Vice Captain]
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White Water Lilly Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2011 9:11 pm
Edited: Well lets try round 2, more info and more Hyuga Jutsu : D
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Posted: Thu Sep 15, 2011 10:59 pm
In the Dead of night...
so just to clarify the story itself i used as the sample is fine i just need to fix the punctuation etc.
...I'll sink my teeth into you
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White Water Lilly Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 6:08 pm
[Lilly] [Vice Captain]
"Lilly and Jade, gearing up for the application war..."
Eijo: Yeah, the amount of techniques incorporated is acceptable and the descriptions are good. Just polish it up and it should be good to go. Know that as this next time will be your third attempt it might take a bit longer to be approved as I'll need to get Jade's option and possibly a third crew member's judgement as well. Anyhow, best of luck.
bb: Much better and I know you had past experience with the Byakugan so I'm not too worried. Just be sure to not forget about the dojutsu deductions and don't abuse it. Other than that, APPROVED!
"...It's a never ending battle out there."
[Jade] [Vice Captain]
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Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 1:09 am
In the Dead of night...
allrighty cooolll ill spend a while on it to be safe.
...I'll sink my teeth into you
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 1:22 am
OK, i've edited my application .*gulp* i've combed through the whole thing so many times my eyes hurt hahaha im pretty sure I found everything hahaha . Fingers crossed. Sorry i fyou allready got this i was just reposting with a quote to be sure you see it =]
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Posted: Wed Sep 28, 2011 6:50 am
I'm submitting this for a new user who requested that I submit the application for him as chances were he wasn't going to be on much today and wanted to attempt to secure the last Sharingan spot. It is submitted exactly as it was sent to me via PM. Please evaluate it as you would all others. thanks!
Member's name : apples g a l o r e
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RPC Name: Katsurou Uchiha
Bloodline/Clan Requested: Sharingan
Why do you want this Bloodline/Clan: My character will be a Genjutsu Class (with Katon as his primary element), thus Sharingan will stack with his class quite well in later stages. Meantime, it will make up for any skills he may be lacking in.
What do you know about the Bloodline/Clan:
-Sharingan is the blood inheritance limit of the Uchiha Clan.
-The Uchiha are said to be descendants of the Hyuuga, with the Byakugan changing into the Sharingan over time.
-This doujutsu gives the ability to read Genjutsu, Taijutsu and Ninjutsu and then defeat it.
-The clan member can view a technique being performed and see the tricks and movements required to be able to complete it.
Please supply a Brief RP Sample: Salted liquid trailed down the side of his neck, making it only so far before the hem of his top absorbed that very sweat into its fabric. His eyes were narrowed slightly, coal orbs flitting from one area to another as if he were expecting something. And, well, he kind of was. His ANBU mask laid some feet away from him in several pieces, showing that he hadn't been taking this battle all too seriously. That was his mistake. He just stood there, his hands fixed into loose fists around the sweat laden handles of twin kodachi. The air around him was silent. Way too silent to be normal. His opponent had managed to hide themselves in the shadows of the tree tops above, taking refuge in some part of darkened forest as he waited for their attack to behold him. He was growing immensely impatient but tried not to let that impatience of his go to his head. That was just what his enemy wanted of him: to lose his calm and break that irritating focus of his. He'd definitely lose this fight if that had been the case.
His ears had caught a very faint rustling of branches and leaves from his far right and he had easily dodged the several kunai and shuriken that had embedded themselves into the ground that he once stood upon. Eyes shinning a deep crimson in the faint dark that surrounded him. He was mere inches away from said weapons and had believed to had missed what they were aiming to do but, he had managed to miss something. His eyes widened slightly, brows furrowed in deep concentration and slight surprise as he finally caught sight of it: the wires tied to the ends of the weapons. Even with his Sharingan activated he tended to miscalculate a move here and there. It wasn't as accurate as he'd liked it to be. He drew in a sharp intake of breath, barely missing the scorching flames that had trailed down the steel wires, setting fire to the dying grass and a few of trees that had been in the way of the crossfire. He had managed to get out of way in time but had sustained a few burns in the process. Not even bothering to examine his wounds, the dark haired male merely smiled indifferently, sheathing his twin kodachi as quickly as his smile rose to his lips. "I'm finished playing around. Face me, coward." He called out to the trees above, almost as quickly catching the few shuriken between a few of his fingers, that now bled a little from a few scratches, and now faced the S-ranked criminal he had been sent to assassinate as a part of his mission.
The black clad female smirked in return, her bright blues sparkling with pure excitement as she got back into her fighting stance, "It's time to dance, kid!" And she had no sooner lunged at him, her sadistic grin widening ever so greatly. He was ready for her however and merely stood there, waiting for her to come at him all the while with an equally as sadistic smile on his own lips. His red hues sparkled with an almost malicious glint as she neared closer and closer, her next move flashing before his eyes even before she had time to execute it. He had this battle in the bag. He saw them, her moves were unfolding before his eyes. The criminal sped up the wide oak tree and headed straight for him - perhaps a risky decision. About four feet away, the vicious female executed a deadly whirlwind composed of two strong kicks. For the first kick, she had spun on the ball of her left foot and lashed out with her right leg. Seeing that the boy had stepped back and dodged her initial attack, she didn't hesitate to follow through with the second kick, performed vice-versa her first. Both kicks were aimed for his sternum. So fluid and so swift were her moves that if it were not for the six tomoe in his eyes, this woman would've devastated him by now.
Since close combat appeared to be his opponent's specialty so far, he decided to put some distance in between her and him. Due to his Sharingan, during her second kick, he had just enough time to prepare the meat of his forearms for receiving her velocious strike. Meantime, he made sure to keep a steady stance. Upon impact with his firm forearms, her kick summoned enough force to send him sliding across the smooth bark of the thick and lengthy branch they fought upon - just as he thought. He squat down slightly, pressing his feet against the bark in order to slow down his drifting as he continued to face her. This was key. He needed both the correct distance and a little time to perform his next move. Thus, immediately after his forearms departed from her kicking leg, he quickly brought both his hands together, in front of his chest, and didn't hesitate to execute the necessary hand signs for summoning a katon technique: Snake, Sheep, Monkey, Boar, Horse, Tiger. By the final hand sign, he was in between 4m to 5m from his target and coming to an abrupt halt on the branch. Yet he did not wait. Two crimson eyes widened in effort as he drew in chakra from his mouth into his chest. At once, he exhaled the gathered chakra and blew out a scorching stream of fire towards his enemy [ Great Fireball Technique ].
This was merely a distraction, however. From his past experiences, he felt the said jutsu would merely act as an obstruction, temporarily hindering his opponent's sight and acting as a fiery barrier in between her and him. Without delay, his hands had departed and moved into the rear pouches of his ANBU outfit. Therein distinct pockets awaited three, wired Windmill Shuriken. "Is that all?!" he heared the wanted woman's muffled taunt through the crackling flames. His lips had unpuckered and his great fireball was quickly dying out. His sharp gaze still looking the girl's direction, he noticed hot vapors spilling upwards, from the center of his fireball. He figured that water and fire would cause vapor to form, therefore his opponent had to have used a suiton technique of some sort [ Water Shield Tech ]. Before the blaze he summoned previously could finish simmering to a naught, he clasped onto his Windmill Shuriken (two in his left hand and one in his right) and held their wires in between the spaces in his fingers. Soon after, he suddenly threw all the shuriken towards the female, controlling their wires to make the blades circle the area where he had seen and heard by him [ Sharingan Windmill Triple Blade ]. His Sharingan helped perform the said technique by tracking his fast-moving objects as they sped through what was left of his katon technque - a dense steam created by her suiton jutsu versus his katon jutsu. Fortunately for him, the steam would provide a nice cover for his thrown three Windmill Shuriken.
She stepped out, "Now, where were we?" The devious woman licked her lips lavaciously as she started for him again. She would not get too far though, for his shuriken had implanted themselves all around the healthy trunk of the large tree, behind the criminal. Furthermore, his twisted wires overlapped and stopped her from progressing any further towards him. Without a moment to waste, he backed a few steps and tugged on the overlapping wires. In accordance with his action, the wires hastily closed the gap in between the criminal and the tree, forcefully pulling and securing her against its dense wood. "Looks like our song has ended." an eerie, slow whisper flowed from his parted lips bit onto the wires' ends. He made sure to keep a strong tension on the metal strands so that she couldn't escape what he was about to do next. Inhaling through his nose, he gathered chakra in his lungs and released it through his next exhale. That next breath would mean the death of his target [ Dragon Fire Technique ].
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White Water Lilly Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2011 12:34 pm
[Lilly] [Vice Captain]
"Lilly and Jade, gearing up for the application war..."
Eijo: Sorry for the late response. There are still a few minor capitalization problems within your roleplay sample but the content was there. Just keep in mind to not misuse this bloodline and that us bloodline mods will be keeping an eye on you for the first while to make sure you're properly using the bloodline. Know that if you do misuse it, the bloodline will be taken away most likely after one written warning. Good job and APPROVED!
apples: Good first take. It was a good rp sample but if possible, including in at least one other stage of the sharigan would be best seeing how there are three stages and we need to know you can properly rp them. Also in your info section, I would like to see more info dealing with our guild's Uchiha bloodline. There are some important info in there such as chakra drain for usage of the sharigan and what not. Please take your time to go over it and simply pm me or Jade to let us know you're finished editing. Good luck.
"...It's a never ending battle out there."
[Jade] [Vice Captain]
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Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2011 11:22 pm
WOOHOOO!!!!!!!!! hahahaha ok ill be sure to be carefull with it.
i'll probably run my more creative ideas for its use by somebody to be sure that its allright.
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Posted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 5:00 pm
RPC Name: Luo Ushio Bloodline/Clan Requested: Re-applying for Ranmaru Bloodline obtained in VR.Why do you want this Bloodline/Clan: The main tasks of a shinobi are to track and eliminate any and all targets with as little detection as possible. With the tracking abilities of the Ranmaru bloodline coupled with the ability to cast genjutsu through walls that can fool even the sharingan & byakugan, this makes my job as a shinobi that more tactically efficient. Not only that, but seeing as how my RPC's primary, secondary, and tertiary attributes will be speed, agility, and intelligence, the ability to track physical movement and chakra would fit my RPC's characteristics of first study then implement very well. What do you know about the Bloodline/Clan: I know that beyond being capable of tracking movement and chakra as well as the byakugan and sharingan on their base levels, the ranmaru eye's also allow for one to track one's life force as well as detect the physical status of an individual. It can track chakra within 200 yards, sense how many individuals are present, and notice fluctuations of chakra. It's ability to cast genjutsu and illusions surpasses that of the byakugan and sharingan, fooling both ocular bloodlines without fail. Finally, the bloodline allows the creation and use of red chakra particles as both offensive and defensive abilities. Please supply a Brief RP Sample: Entering the village, Luo sighed a bit adjusting the strap on his goggles thinking to himself, "Three targets, one dojutsu, two different clan members. The file says the squad meets in the top floor of the training dojo here every Tuesday and Thursday. Well, this ought to be interesting." Slipping into an alley, Luo ran through backstreets until he noticed something. Wanting to make sure, Luo continued snaking through for another ten minutes until he was certain: He was being followed. There was only one of them, but he assumed it to be an ANBU guard, someone way above his rank. Instead of fighting however, Luo opted for evasion. Continuing his pace, Luo ran through a few seals muttering, "Life force Phantom." As he did so, he burst into a sprint, pointing in the other direction for the phantom to go in. The clone hid Luo's true chakra signature and instead gave off its own of his own kind, and just as well a life force signature. The clone darted through the alley-ways until the ANBU guard at last revealed himself by picking up his pace in order to obtain a visual on the target. However, Luo in truth was watching from the rooftop of the dojo which he had only just scaled. He waited until the guard dropped onto the ground level and then forced one seal as he yelled to the clone "Hey!" In that instant, the clone burst into red particles. Heaving a sigh as the man looked around, Luo muttered, "Well, I guess that doesn't buy me too much time. He'll probably look around that area for the next ten minutes, so I better work fast." Activating his eyes, they emitted a faint red flow for a moment before fading back to the stark midnight blue they originally were. He could sense three people inside, however focusing closely he eliminated the roof as a visual barrier. The targets were all there, and time was of the essence. Holding one hand seal, Luo concentrated hard on his targets, too distracted with training to notice an oddity. The room filled with falling white feathers and as they all stopped to look, the trio seemed to get sleepy until finally, two out of the three dropped to the floor having fallen prey to the Temple of Nirvana technique. The third however was looking around frantically until finally staring directly up towards the roof where Luo was. The man's eyes were stark red, a mark of an Uchiha who most likely saw his chakra signature. Forcing the kai hand signature, Luo cut off the genjutsu as the man sprinted towards the window, throwing a kunai to break it and jumping onto the next roof. Cursing under his breath seeing the man begin to run, Luo formed one more seal, sending red chakra particles through the cracks of the wooden roof towards the sleeping targets, wrapping around them and suffocating them till death. The last target as this slow process occurred was nearing the end of Luo's tracking radius, so he hopped to it. Racing after him it took a while until he at last caught up, being a speed type shinobi this wasn't too difficult. The particles he created had trailed after him. As the shinobi stalled to confront Luo, he caused the particles to trail on the ground as he threw two kunai. As the man defended Luo muttered, "Gotcha." the man was too busy with the kunai to notice the particles snaking the rooftop and around his legs. He was caught no doubt about it. Forcing his arms upwards quickly, the particles shot up into the man's face and chest, the initial blunt force knocking him out until one final completed his job. Receding the particles, Luo deactivated his eyes and burst into a spray of mist, using the instantaneous body skill to cause his escape to be easy. His job was done, however not as cleanly as he had hoped. Still, the task was completed and he could report back with the good news.
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Posted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 5:25 pm
[Lilly] [Vice Captain]
"Lilly and Jade, gearing up for the application war..."
Luo: Been waiting for you to join! Approved!
"...It's a never ending battle out there."
[Jade] [Vice Captain]
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A faint smile Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 1:02 am
@Ijwlz: I was sick and my charger broke before I decided I might as well get back in here haha. P.S.- I believe you and iKaze have some work to do in CoPS!
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Reply
