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Lo, I say unto you dudes and dudettes that I am done with the construction of the Grand Ditch of Hoboken. It was a difficult task, one that can be likened to destroying the pyramids with nought but a toothpick.

A difficult task I assure you.

You know, well of course not you can't read my mind- OR CAN YOU. No, I am certain that you cannot. But beleive me when I say this: I am watching you. EVEN NOW.

I shall now tell you that which I was speaking of. I cannot wait for my friends to tell me what they did over this Summer. I can see it now. "Oh, I went to the Moon and danced." "I went to Europe and found out that I am ROYALTY." "What did you do Pickle?"

I imagine them looking at me out from under raised eyebrows, breatheless with anticipation. I would lean back in my chair and arch an eyebrow. The with a smirk on my face, I would lean forward and whisper, "I dug ditches."