what do i do when i know i cant have her

[paladin of darkness 1985]

im dating this wonderful girl and have been for almost a year. i love her more than anything. shes all i think about. all i live for. now the problem is that i see her bout once or twice a month now. for the first six months we were dating she lived 2 hours away. then i moved in with her and lived with her and her parents for a while. things didnt work out between me and her parents and i moved back to were i was before. she is still in highschool and has one more year to go and will not move to live with me. after highschool she is going to college or the forces and wants to do that for life. idk what im going to do cause its killin me now to not be with her. i dont wanta life the rest of my life like this. she is all i have. i dont have any friends and dont talk to my family much. my mom is the only one i talk to. idk what to do could someone help me plz?

[Nari of Nowhere]

most importantly: TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL!!! there isn't much she can do until she's out of high school. so long as she's in public schools her parents legally rule her life (at least that's how it is here) even if she is 18... once she graduates ask her again, she may change her mind when the opportunity actually arises. if she still wants to go to college or join the forces, just be supportive and (if you can't leave b/c you're tied down by a job, etc.) let her know you're always just a phone call away. if she goes to a college near where you are, continue to offer her a place even if you're convincing argument is that it'll be cheaper than dorms.

[Cohcho the Empress]

Talk to the girl. Talk about what you want from life, individually. If too much doesn't fit together, you're going to have to let her go. Its easier to get over than you think...and then you'll find a new girl who'll share the same values as you do and the same kinds of life goals. Or maybe it'll turn out that you want to work with her to fit everything in. She's still young. She might change her life goals.

[Erde Ferret]

It's unhealthy to be so devoted to someone.

I suggest making some friends to get your mind off her as much as possible.

If you can, I suggest calling her and talking to her too. It doesn't sound like you're completely shut off from her in that aspect.

[The Progenitor Slime]

well if she can't/won't move to live with you because she's got plans for her future then you need to be the one to move for her. If you can't move either then there isn't much you can do. She's got her future planned out, you can either put yours on hold for her or you can leave her to go her way and you to go yours. Either way, just make sure you talk to her about what you should do. Everything needs to be out in the open. Obviously.

[SilverTempest]

Right now you're in a very sticky position, though, it's one that you should deal with rather quickly in order to keep stability in your life. You have to decide whether waiting it out is better or if giving her up is better. Right now she is legally bound by her parents since she does live with them and is a dependent of them. When she's done, she has goals she would like to achieve. Now, it comes down to if she wants to include you in her future or not. Allow her to know how you feel, but if she cannot feel the same way, then you need to end it there. Allowing yourself to be so absorbed into one person is not a healthy decision for your life.

One thing I've learned is that you cannot allow someone to be what you live for until you are married and it is all said and done. There is a high level of uncertainty of whether or not the relationship can continue and yet you've splayed your dependency on this one girl. What if she denies you and that's that? Your life is at that point crushed for a long amount of time. Do yourself a favor and get things figured out and then decide how you want to proceed given any outcome. It's best to not get so attached and try to push the situation when the other doesn't feel the same.