TTC and Adoption Support O5.29.2O15

What about you?

I'm trying to conceive!	15.2%	[ 96 ]
I have a baby!	7.0%	[ 44 ]
I'm TTC #2+!	3.3%	[ 21 ]
I don't want kids	22.2%	[ 140 ]
I'm pregnant!	7.8%	[ 49 ]
I'm infertile	5.1%	[ 32 ]
I'm just voting~	39.5%	[ 249 ]
Total Votes:			[ 631 ]

[Pink Peppercorn]

Petrosoap

AngelBiscuits

Petrosoap

♛

Congratulations. Unfortunately, many of us here do not have any advice and it's time for you to move on to the pregnancy support thread. You'll have more luck there.

♚

Wow. "Congratulations, go away"? Okay. That's rude, but I don't have a problem leaving. I'm sorry if my post offended you.

And seriously, I hope your support group doesn't tell you to ******** off when you become pregnant.

Most of us here have been around since the beginning of this thread, meaning a lot of us have been TTC for 1+ year(s) and may be going through infertility treatments. There really was no need to post photos of your positive tests. There is also no need for you to post here anymore, seeing as you are no longer "trying". Your hostility is totally unwarranted. We have formed a pretty supportive, tight-knit group so we will definitely support anyone who leaves this thread with a pregnancy.

Here is a link to the pregnancy support thread.



Have a happy & healthy 9 months!

[AngelBiscuits]

♛

I just came back to say that we did get a call back from the clinic, and my husband has a low sperm count. I've been avoiding this thread since then but I feel like actually talking about it might help. Honestly I'm just a mix of devastated and frustrated and I've been crying on and off since we found out. I had a breakdown the other day and had to leave Walmart and go sit in the parking lot because the baby clothes I had to pass by to get to the electronics just threw me over the edge. I just really hate this.

They're having him do the test again in a month to see if it was an issue that will sort itself out and will be doing bloodwork at that time, but we're not holding our breath. They talked about possibly putting us both on clomid (apparently there's a version for men?) if it doesn't sort itself out. If it doesn't improve we have about a 2% chance of conceiving naturally. He's trying to not let it bother him, because it could just be a simple little thing that will sort itself out, but we both know that it likely isn't since it's taking so long.

The testing was supposed to make this easier and instead we just discovered there was another hurdle the entire time.

♚

[karate chop kitten]

AngelBiscuits

♛

I just came back to say that we did get a call back from the clinic, and my husband has a low sperm count. I've been avoiding this thread since then but I feel like actually talking about it might help. Honestly I'm just a mix of devastated and frustrated and I've been crying on and off since we found out. I had a breakdown the other day and had to leave Walmart and go sit in the parking lot because the baby clothes I had to pass by to get to the electronics just threw me over the edge. I just really hate this.

They're having him do the test again in a month to see if it was an issue that will sort itself out and will be doing bloodwork at that time, but we're not holding our breath. They talked about possibly putting us both on clomid (apparently there's a version for men?) if it doesn't sort itself out. If it doesn't improve we have about a 2% chance of conceiving naturally. He's trying to not let it bother him, because it could just be a simple little thing that will sort itself out, but we both know that it likely isn't since it's taking so long.

The testing was supposed to make this easier and instead we just discovered there was another hurdle the entire time.

♚

I'm sorry to hear this. I really hope that now they know what is going on then maybe they can help you faster.

[MrsHanaway]

I see it's been a few months since anyone has posted in here and I was wondering how the group was. We are still TTC. No changes on this front. sad

[karate chop kitten]

MrsHanaway

I see it's been a few months since anyone has posted in here and I was wondering how the group was. We are still TTC. No changes on this front. sad

Same with us. I have also joined a few TTC groups on Facebook, it's nice being able to talk with others who are going through the same thing as we are.

[II a r c II]

Hello, everyone. I'm not going to take the time to format this post, but it's been almost a year since the last time I posted here.

My divorce was finalized on October 20th (the irony, right?) last year. About a month ago I found out that my ex husband has a baby girl now (yeah, I did the math, too) I guess he couldn't even wait until our divorce was finalized to knock up the first girl he could.

On top of that, last August our mutual close friend passed away from suicide. 2015 was a very, very hard year.

2016 however, has been looking a little brighter. I did earn my associates degree, and although things didn't work out with the 4 year college last semester (due to the tremendous amount of personal grief I was going through), I am working now, in the city. I'm hoping to find another part-time job, or become full time somewhere so I can begin looking in to the adoption process. I can be a mother without a husband, and I can be a mother without giving birth. I have not given up. Well, I did, but I am getting back up and dusting off.

When I start the process I will be sure to include that in the story here, 100%.

[AngelBiscuits]

I can't imagine how that must have felt, Arc, that was terrible of him. I'm glad to see you still want to adopt, though and that 2016 is looking better for you.

We're going to hit three years, I know that now. We were supposed to start Clomid this cycle, but the doctor got my husband's last test result and he has a low sperm count, we were hoping it was just a one-time thing, but it wasn't. It's not as low as last time, but it's still pretty low and we have to put off the drugs again.

He's being sent to a urologist but if they don't find anything then it doesn't look like there's much we can do about it. He said the best we can do at that point aside from AI, IUI, and IVF is put me on a medication to regulate my cycles and hope for the best. Unfortunately there really isn't much help for low counts if they can't find a cause.

What else is frustrating though, is my doctor is now insisting that I lose weight and that it will help my cycles be more regular. Which I understand, I'm overweight and I know I need to fix that, and it might help a little, but my cycles were literally always like this, even when I was a healthy weight. It's just very frustrating because no one listens to that.

It's like "Oh, you've had irregular periods and questionable ovulation since you were 13? Must be all that weight you gained when you were 20!"

EDIT:
He got his referral from the urologist. His appointment is for the 19th of October.
I am going to stay with his parents for the month of September (we're moving there for my job) and he was initially going to quit his job earlier and come with me, but we've decided that it's the perfect time to give ourselves a break from the whole baby-making business.

[Mega Lya]

HI! smile ok not actively seeking pregnancy, adoption, etc. However, I am going to begin looking into adoption in the future, within a few years once I become more stable in my career. I've always had an interest in special needs adoption because my cousin who was severely special needs with Allan-Herndon-Dudley Syndrome, played a big role in my life, as well as our "adopted in" uncle, with Down's Syndrome (friend of the family) also played a big role.

My main interest is adopting a child with Down's Syndrome. I'm also interested in possibly autism, or non-verbal autism, and/or possibly wheel chair bound. I'm not very confident in my abilities in feeding tubes/GI issues, or other lifelong medical equipment, although my cousin both used a feeding tube, PICC line, etc.

It's so cool to me that there is a group for this. I used to be very active on Gaia, but left around 2010/11

Adoption also seems easier for me because of my erratic periods (l literally get them and they last an entire month.. emo ) and personally I don't feel suuuuuper comfortable bringing a child into this world right about now until, hopefully, the world takes a bit of a chill pill and we all quit on hating one another heart

[Abyssus _Puella]

Hello all,
Me and my boyfriend have started trying to have a baby...well we're not-not trying. xp
I, myself, have issues with a regular cycle every month and he has an undescended testicle(that may or may not work). We're only in the first month of trying but I told him becuase the issues we both have, if we haven't gotten pregnant in six months, we should go see a specialist, although I know most say to wait a year or more.
Does anyone have an advice?

[AngelBiscuits]

Abyssus _Puella

Hello all,
Me and my boyfriend have started trying to have a baby...well we're not-not trying. xp
I, myself, have issues with a regular cycle every month and he has an undescended testicle(that may or may not work). We're only in the first month of trying but I told him becuase the issues we both have, if we haven't gotten pregnant in six months, we should go see a specialist, although I know most say to wait a year or more.
Does anyone have an advice?

They likely won't do much for you until it's been a year, even if you have pre-existing issues. It's perfectly normal for it to take up to a year to get pregnant in young adults, and that's why they don't really see people before that point even if there are issues. With a perfectly healthy couple there's a less than 25% chance of getting pregnant each cycle so they often want you to keep trying a bit longer to see if it will happen on it's own with more time, especially if you're "not-not trying".

I was in your situation though, I have PCOS and my husband has some weird lump on his one testicle, but they pushed off doing anything right away because my irregular cycles meant that it could really just take a bit longer. It was frustrating at the time, but I understand why they did it now.

You should start to keep track of ovulation, you can do this with your temperature, cervical mucus/position, OPK's, ferning, etc. I use a fertility tracker app, combined with ferning and OPK's to predict when I might be most fertile. A ferning microscope is fairly cheap and it's best to buy the OPK's in bulk from amazon or some place.

As far as apps go, I find the better ones are Ovuview, Fertility Friend and Ovia. I know a lot of people really like Fertility Friend but I just can't make it work for me. Ovuview is my favourite but it's only available on Android. A lot of people don't like Ovia, but in the last year or so it's gone through a lot of changes and I just find it works the best for me.

I'm sorry if that's a lot to read! I just hope I was helpful in some way.

[Abyssus _Puella]

AngelBiscuits

Abyssus _Puella

Hello all,
Me and my boyfriend have started trying to have a baby...well we're not-not trying. xp
I, myself, have issues with a regular cycle every month and he has an undescended testicle(that may or may not work). We're only in the first month of trying but I told him becuase the issues we both have, if we haven't gotten pregnant in six months, we should go see a specialist, although I know most say to wait a year or more.
Does anyone have an advice?

They likely won't do much for you until it's been a year, even if you have pre-existing issues. It's perfectly normal for it to take up to a year to get pregnant in young adults, and that's why they don't really see people before that point even if there are issues. With a perfectly healthy couple there's a less than 25% chance of getting pregnant each cycle so they often want you to keep trying a bit longer to see if it will happen on it's own with more time, especially if you're "not-not trying".

I was in your situation though, I have PCOS and my husband has some weird lump on his one testicle, but they pushed off doing anything right away because my irregular cycles meant that it could really just take a bit longer. It was frustrating at the time, but I understand why they did it now.

You should start to keep track of ovulation, you can do this with your temperature, cervical mucus/position, OPK's, ferning, etc. I use a fertility tracker app, combined with ferning and OPK's to predict when I might be most fertile. A ferning microscope is fairly cheap and it's best to buy the OPK's in bulk from amazon or some place.

As far as apps go, I find the better ones are Ovuview, Fertility Friend and Ovia. I know a lot of people really like Fertility Friend but I just can't make it work for me. Ovuview is my favourite but it's only available on Android. A lot of people don't like Ovia, but in the last year or so it's gone through a lot of changes and I just find it works the best for me.

I'm sorry if that's a lot to read! I just hope I was helpful in some way.

Haha, it wasn't a lot to read, it was fine.
I should have said before but I had an Ex before and we were together for 6 years having casual unprotected sex and never got pregnant. But again, it's a different person now, so there could have been factors I didn't know about. I know most doctors won't do anything until it's been at least a year but it makes me a little frustrated because that means I would have to until I'm almost 30 to have a kid....

[AngelBiscuits]

Abyssus _Puella

Haha, it wasn't a lot to read, it was fine.
I should have said before but I had an Ex before and we were together for 6 years having casual unprotected sex and never got pregnant. But again, it's a different person now, so there could have been factors I didn't know about. I know most doctors won't do anything until it's been at least a year but it makes me a little frustrated because that means I would have to until I'm almost 30 to have a kid....

Honestly, everyone gets frustrated when they have to wait. No one wants to wait a year to get pregnant, whether they're 21 or 31, but if it's going to happen naturally it will likely happen within a year so there's really no need to be concerned until it's been that long. Even if you were trying with someone else before, they're still not likely to be too concerned about it until then since it's a different partner. You can see a doctor about it sooner if you want, but try not to get too upset if they ask you to wait a bit longer. It's frustrating, but they have their reasons for it.

Anyway, it's still important to be keeping track of when you might be fertile. When you're just trying casually and you have a long cycle it's very easy to miss that fertile window.

[Abyssus _Puella]

AngelBiscuits

Abyssus _Puella

Haha, it wasn't a lot to read, it was fine.
I should have said before but I had an Ex before and we were together for 6 years having casual unprotected sex and never got pregnant. But again, it's a different person now, so there could have been factors I didn't know about. I know most doctors won't do anything until it's been at least a year but it makes me a little frustrated because that means I would have to until I'm almost 30 to have a kid....

Honestly, everyone gets frustrated when they have to wait. No one wants to wait a year to get pregnant, whether they're 21 or 31, but if it's going to happen naturally it will likely happen within a year so there's really no need to be concerned until it's been that long. Even if you were trying with someone else before, they're still not likely to be too concerned about it until then since it's a different partner. You can see a doctor about it sooner if you want, but try not to get too upset if they ask you to wait a bit longer. It's frustrating, but they have their reasons for it.

Anyway, it's still important to be keeping track of when you might be fertile. When you're just trying casually and you have a long cycle it's very easy to miss that fertile window.

Luckly, I haven't been on birth control in a couple of years, so I have a fairly good charted cycle on my phone, I cycles can be anywhere form 28-40 days, which meams the ovulation time changes. THAT of itself can be annoying, I should really get some of those ovulation test thing to be sure of when I do actually ovulation.

[AngelBiscuits]

Abyssus _Puella

Luckly, I haven't been on birth control in a couple of years, so I have a fairly good charted cycle on my phone, I cycles can be anywhere form 28-40 days, which meams the ovulation time changes. THAT of itself can be annoying, I should really get some of those ovulation test thing to be sure of when I do actually ovulation.

I feel you. My cycles can be anywhere from 42 to 150+ days so my ovulation is really hard to predict as well, but what worked for me was a combination of tracking ferning and using the OPK's. The OPK's can get a little pricety even if you're buying them in bulk so the ferning lets me know when it might be coming up. Temping is good too, but it's most useful in telling you when you have already ovulated.