Dirty Little Secrets [Announcement 11/8/2023| Reminder 2024]

Before I go, I've got to know:

Is that what you mean to say?	29.2%	[ 800 ]
Before I rise to my defense,	4.9%	[ 134 ]
Before I speak in hurt or fear,	5.5%	[ 151 ]
Before I build that wall of words,	4.2%	[ 115 ]
Tell me: did I really hear?	10.1%	[ 276 ]
Words are windows, or they're walls,	9.7%	[ 265 ]
They sentence us, or set us free.	6.2%	[ 169 ]
When I speak and when I hear,	3.0%	[ 81 ]
Let the love light shine through me.	27.4%	[ 751 ]
Total Votes:			[ 2742 ]

[cr0wchild]

Still not feeling great.

I'm tired and anxious almost constantly. This thing with the reading/ writing hasn't gotten better (tho i did only just bring it up in therapy last week so).

I still feel useless and awkward and stupid and like I'm not worth anyone's time or effort. Being ghosted constantly isn't helping, but my therapist said to stop taking that personally bc it likely has nothing to do with me. Easier said than done when I can SEE them actively ignoring me while engaging with others. But whatever I guess. I don't matter anyway. Clearly.

I miss being able to just read without comparing myself to whatever it is. To just enjoy the damn story without constantly feeling inferior to whichever author it is. I've tried to actively stop those thoughts but they're so intrusive. And depressing. Knowing that people just don't have any interest in what I'm trying to write doesn't help. I know I should just create for myself, but... it's so disheartening to know that no one else cares. Even outside of potential readers, knowing that my "friends" don't support me or my projects is depressing af.

Oh well. None of it matters anyway right?

[cr0wchild]

Also love being made to feel guilty about needing to nap, when 9 times out of 10, I've been up 4 hours longer (or more) and have actively been doing things to maintain the house, while they sleep til noon and then stay up all night.

Like excuse me for being tired after doing chores all morning while you sleep?

[Seafyre]

Im just easily ignored and tossed away

[danndelion]

━━˖°˖ ☾☆☽ ˖°˖ ━━━━━━━

oof. hospital bill arrived at my parents' place.
i'm nauseated thinking about what the damage will be

━━━━━━━━━━⚝☾⋆⭒˚｡⋆

[Ekopinion]

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

You know you're becoming an adult when you get excited about new dishes

[Tetram0rphes]

Today ********.. sucks.

I’d give just about anything to be cuddled up and loved on while I cry lmfao.

[no scheisse]

Tetram0rphes

Today ********.. sucks.

I’d give just about anything to be cuddled up and loved on while I cry lmfao.

[no scheisse]

i want life to just stop.

[no scheisse]

just dont wanna do anything anymore

[no scheisse]

its all just done. im done with everything. theres no more impact i can even make on my own life

[Gothor Salvator]

how have i not gone batshit yet

[FaithEmblem]

took a bunch of tylenol this morning to try and help my eyes
both the top and bottom eyelids were swollen to like twice their size
they are shaking
muscles twitching on and off all day

It's been like this for a long time now-- where anytime I cry, the next day all of this happens to my eyes.

There was a time in my life where I cried like every day, and then multiple times a week and I think maybe that's why they are so messed up now

If I don't get this money back it will hurt me. Like, I will never feel good about myself ever again.

[ScreamingTrashCat]

My aunt’s surgery went well but I am so tired.
x.x