Dirty Little Secrets [Announcement 11/8/2023| Reminder 2024]

Before I go, I've got to know:

Is that what you mean to say?	29.1%	[ 803 ]
Before I rise to my defense,	5.0%	[ 138 ]
Before I speak in hurt or fear,	5.5%	[ 152 ]
Before I build that wall of words,	4.2%	[ 116 ]
Tell me: did I really hear?	10.1%	[ 277 ]
Words are windows, or they're walls,	9.7%	[ 267 ]
They sentence us, or set us free.	6.1%	[ 169 ]
When I speak and when I hear,	3.0%	[ 82 ]
Let the love light shine through me.	27.3%	[ 752 ]
Total Votes:			[ 2756 ]

[The Darker Shadow]

Welp, I guess we're not talking.
I've tried plenty of times.
------

I need to take more risks. My best friend met his girlfriend at a party when she offered to let him crash at her places because he was a bit too tipsy to ride his bike back to his. Then being the charming b*****d that he is, managed to convince her to let him sleep with her (in the eyes closed, dreaming sense). They're going great too.

[Blaq Blue]

When I put this machine together, the instructions were literally all pictures except the the labeling of the screws, bolts, A-B-C-D-etc.
...
Now I have to oil it all up and all the instructions are just words.
Which middle part is it?
I just says to oil one side, but it's important to do the correct side, but which one?
Some pictures would really come in handy right now.

The need to learn the medium and put pictures and words in both of these manuals.
This is ******** ridiculous.

[PeachyPosterior]

⚓ Matt's a silly guy. Bit too egotistical, though he swears otherwise.
He makes for great conversation though. I have the best ones riding along with drivers though.
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xxxxxx F R E E D O M is a fancy word for options

[Werefox]

I only feel heavy... overwhelmed... minutes seem to pass by so slowly... I can't with my soul anymore...

[Mado Kureo]

i just took a "what's your superhero name" quiz and got brass monkey.

and, honestly, that sounds like some stupid s**t i would do. i would totally name myself brass monkey.

[Misses Indie]

Every day I have the urge to punch the guy in my training class in the face.

[Werefox]

I'll throw my words to the wind... where no one could hear them but at the same time someone could catch them... my feelings are destroyed, my heart undone... the pain on the flesh is bearable, the but wounds on the heart sometimes never heals...

[Werefox]

Such a painful day is today... the minutes feel like hours... and having to get back to work is unappealing so much... I wish I could stay in a corner just to be away from world... away from the pain...

[Kiro_Shinigami]

My former friends are asshats =3= They cannot grasp the concept of FRIENDSHIP if it was hurled at em with a BRICK to the face!

[Werefox]

I close my eyes... I feel slow... I feel i'll cry but my tears won't come out perhaps I'm holding them back... my heart feels sunken... feels like it beats slower every time... I haven't felt this sadness in years... I thought it was long gone... but I was so wrong... it is possible to feel such deep sadness more than once...

[Everyday Arson Man]

I guess you feel back asleep. That's adorb's. I bet that's my fault, haha. I think I keep you up too late.

I'unno. I don't really enjoy being in Utah anymore. I regret moving here, if I were to be 100%. I should have moved to Chicago, near Ross. Instead, I chased butterflies West. No, not even. This was an act of desperation, chasing shadows. Apparitions, delusions I had crafted in my head. And this whole time I've been here, I've been waiting for rain that never falls. Expecting it to fall on my tongue, simply because I've thirsted for it.

I don't want to be here anymore. What have I got, here? Reminders and relapses, waiting at home for me.



...You woke up : ) I'unno. I still think it's the cutest thing ever. Sigh. I don't know. I don't want to "carry on" alone. I did, for a while. I wanted to shoulder the weight of my world alone, because, well. That's how it always ends up, you know? And up to this point, the more people I let in? The more they add to that burden. They add their own weights to my back, and end up leaving me with the strain. I lost interest in that. Fully. Wholeheartedly. I wanted nothing more than to rebuild my empire for one, not two, not three. Just me. And then you come along. And, well. I'unno. The feeling of someone caring for more than what I can give them is nice. I forgot what it feels like for someone to reciprocate affection, and I forgot what it feels like for someone to genuinely care - in such a capacity it radiates from them and warms me. Comforts me. Yeah, maybe that's a better word for it.

You do for me more than you think, just by being you. And... I hope I don't regret this later (I won't lie, part of me is still terrified of things ending up like so many others I've let in - I hope to get over that soon, because you seem so genuine), but I want to rebuild for us. Not just me. Me and you. Hopefully we get that far - I'd love to see that.

Yeesh... I just want to give you a big hug. I'm in one of those moods. And I could really stand for having you near, right now.

[A BLOODBATH]

i finally got to sleep today
i am so ******** grateful

my muscles are still agonizingly sore, but at least my brain had a rest.

i need to buy some foods with good fats and tons of proteins... as much as i am disgusted by eggs, those fit the specs. i think i'll buy some cage free organics and try to figure out how to prepare them in a way that makes them taste/seem less disgusting : |

[Mado Kureo]

i'm afraid of being afraid. i need to work on accepting that it's okay to be scared. maybe then i'll be able to work on all of my fears. i don't want to face them, not at all, but maybe i'll have to in order to overcome them. it won't be okay, not at first, but eventually my life will be better and i'll be happier because of it. i don't want to accept living the rest of my life like this. i don't want to be alright with that. i want to be able to do things for myself and function like a normal person.

i have medicine now. that's the first step in getting better, and i'm going to take it every time i need to. i won't give up on this. i'm making a promise to myself, and i know that doesn't mean much because i'm not the best at keeping promises to myself, but this time it's real. it has to be real. i need to do this.

i need to make myself better.

for now, though, i'm going to ******** sleep. i am so tired. D;

[Smoking Daffodils]

I'm worried
I'm trying not to be but I am

I've been here before
exactly in this spot

"oh were just friends"
ect

then it's not friends anymore
and it scares me
those feelings were there once before
how do you know they can't come back?
we can't control how we feel about someone else

I don't like it

[mewkittyy]

that was so calming.

trimmed/groomed the tulips my mom received from her company.
lit some moonlight jasmine.

took my pills on time for once.
trying not to think about dbt tomorrow.