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Report | 06/19/2023 8:29 pm

Leaving a comment bc why not

Report | 08/04/2022 8:00 pm

Oh Gosh, walking heads!? Stop sayin' things like that! I'm gonna have ta borrow some a Giorgio's lucky charms if weird stuff like this keeps happenin' ta me. *shivers*

I swear I weren't movin' no body, Detective! *Santino bites his lip and nervously looks from side to side* I were actually told ta wait fa someone. Got that Bani Cop, waitin' not killin'. Anywho, I'd been waitin' fa hours and I had just finished up a large drink. So I... I uh... ya know, nature were callin'. Ya know that feelin' right, Detective? Right? So, I thought I'd just relieve myself in the alley. Just real quick. Yeah, that's it, real quick.

*Hesitates for a moment* And, I ain't helpin' the fuzz when I say this. Just tryin' ta clear my name a murda and all.... Rumor's that Tony's been doin' things he ought not on the east, west, and north side-a town. It's just a rumor though; so, no one's been payin' much attention to it. I mean, he'd have ta be pretty stupid ta pull somethin' like that.

*Becomes distracted by the loud banging coming from outside*
I don't know... yous guys are starting ta make me think ya ain't really cops in the first place. Or, ya just dirty... Who's payin' ya ta find Fat Tony's killa anyway? I mean, who would even give a hoot 'bout Tony?

Report | 07/30/2022 9:49 pm

Santino_Piazzi

*Snickers at 'Unlucky Jim's unfortunate nickname*

Oh, yeah! I could really use a cup a joe. I've been pullin' an all nighta. So coffee would be great, real grea- ... Wait, wait a minute. *Santino side eyes Bani Cop* I know what ya doin'. That's uh... that's a manipulation thing, yeah. It's where ya do somethin' good for me so I feel inclined ta do somethin' good in return. I scratch ya back and you scratch mine.

Ya know, I get this feelin' like ya tryin' ta get me ta rat someone out! Gosh, I ain't no rat, detective! You know what would happen if I squealed on someone? Do ya? I'd get ventilated or even worse... *swallows hard and puts his hands around his neck protectively* a Sicilian necktie. *Santino shivers and shakes his head from side to side, vigorously*

I mean, even just bein' here could get me in a whole lotta trouble. *wrings hands together nervously* If Boss found out... Oooh Gosh, I don't even wanna think about it. I ain't, I ain't gonna think 'bout it. I just ain't.

Listen Detective Ravens. I don't know nothin' 'bout Fat Tony. He works on the east side-a town. Wait, were Tony the one in the alley!? I were standin' on top a Tony? *Santino rubs his forehead and sinks down in his seat* Oh gosh.... I think I'm gonna have that coffee now.

Report | 07/19/2022 5:03 pm

Santino_Piazzi

What, 4 feet!? Gosh, I knew that alley smelt kinda funny but I didn't see no head. Besides, it were dark. How could I've seen a head in the dark? Ya gotta believe me detective! I would neva dump a stiff in an alley. I mean, that's just stupid, right? I'd dump um where they ain't neva gonna be found, like at the bottom of the ocean or maybe unda some cement on a construction site or somethin'.

N-Not that I do, I don't, I'm a good hard workin' citizen. Yeah, that's right, good and hard workin'. How do ya know it ain't one a ya boys gone rogue on ya? huh? I mean, they found it and they were near it to, right? Right!

Sounds more like ya behind the eight ball on this one and ya just lookin' fa some fall guy. I ain't bumped no one off, Bani Cop. Even if they really deserved ta be whacked. I still think it's the boys on the south side.

Report | 07/12/2022 7:55 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Detective Bani?!
*Chokes*
Body!? What body? I swear I didn't know there were a body! I mean, why would I be hangin' 'round a body? That's crazy!
*Santino straightens his suit lapels*
What ya really should be worried 'bout is how rough ya boys are. Talk 'bout unnecessary force. I weren't gonna run. I got nothin' ta hide.
*Looks down and rubs his sore forearms*
It's gettin' ta the point were a mug can't walk down the street without gettin' framed fa murder.

Report | 06/19/2022 8:11 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Average lookin'!? Gosh, I thought I were a little more than average lookin'.
*takes the business card and gives it a once over*
Yeah, sure thing Detective.
*is about to leave but stops*
Wait, you mean we're gonna have Zombies on the loose? Gosh, what's this world comin' to when a mug's gotta watch his back for Zombies.
*Santino opens the ominous black car's driver side door*
Oh, don't fa-get what I said 'bout those south side goons. They're always up ta no good. Just be careful, they like ta carry some real crazy heat. Ya know, like Chicago typewriters, if ya know what I mean. Any who, I'll make sure ta keep an eye out for ya.
*climbs into the car and revs the engine before speeding off*

Report | 06/18/2022 10:16 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Gosh, my business? Oh, I don’t got no business. My Boss pays me pretty good, ya know.
*shrugs, hands still shoved into his suit pant’s pockets*
But some schmuck given’ ya a description that matches mine? I mean, Imma brown haired, hazel eyed mug. Isn’t that like almost every jaspa walkin’ down the street? I still say ya informant is all wet.
*Santino takes his hand out of his pocket to tip his fedora*
Anyways, I already told ya Detective, I were at my house, feedin’ my cat. I gotta witness who was there with me, yeah a witness. If I were you I’d be lookin’ at the boys on the south side a town. They’re real shady. Maybe you could uh ventilate a few. Ya know, shoot before ya ask any questions. You’d be doin’ the world a fava.

Report | 06/16/2022 7:44 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Oh gosh, wait! I don't got no soul ta give ya and I ain't in the position ta owe ya a fava! Gosh... owin' a flatfoot a fava?
*shivers at the thought*
If ya want my soul as payment, ya gotta take that up with the owna.
*furrows brow in disappointment*
Darn, I really wanted ta see what was unda that mask. I betcha all scarred up and scary lookin'. Ya know, like the guy in that opera? He wears the mask and lives unda some kinda theater. Oh, and he's all obsessed with some singin' lady? Yeah, I betcha look like 'im.... Ya sure ya won't take cash instead, Mr. Detective?

Report | 06/15/2022 10:27 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Oh, you think I’m funny, I’m entertainin’ ya? That’s great but there’s no need ta bring the boys in blue in ta this. I mean that’s a lot a pressure on a mug ta perform and all. Besides it wouldn’t look real great for me ta be seen around a bunch a cops. I got a rep ta uphold, ya know what I’m sayin’? Ya got a rep, right officer Bani?

Oh gosh, and I don’t know about ya talkin’ ta my cat. Charlie Bruiser ain’t as nice as I am. He don’t like cops… I mean, I totally like cops, they’re great! Serve and protect in all, right? But Bruiser on the otha paw, not so much. Besides I don’t want no lawsuit if he scratches ya or somethin’.

Oh, yeah, I know information ain’t free. I got an associate who says that all the time. How much ya want? I mean, I don’t got that much but I can sure grease ya palm. Soooo uh, how much ta take off ya mask?

Report | 06/13/2022 7:29 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Gosh, didn't mean ta step on no toes Mr. Detective Ravens, Sir.... Nervous? Who's nervous?
*straightens up, eyes wide open*
The 5th!? Oh gosh, um, I were at home. Yeah that's it, at home feedin' my cat. Yeah..... Wait, where were you on the 5th, huh, Detective Ravens?
*suspiciously looks Bani Cop up and down*
I gotta question for ya? What kinda cop's gotta wear a mask? If anyone's got somethin' ta hide, I think it's you. yeah.
*crosses arms and leans against the car*
I think you's the killa.

Report | 06/12/2022 9:07 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Oh gosh... Three stiffs? Why would I know anythin' 'bout 3 stiffs? I ain't never hurt nobody! I mean, I ain't never gave no one cement shoes or nothin'.... Wait, cement what? Why would I say that? I mean, I don't even know what cement shoes are! Why would I say that? Gosh is it hot or is it just me?
*swallows hard*
Sorry ta say it Mr. Bani boy but someone musta gave ya a bum tip cuz I don't look nothin' like no perp. Yeah, no way.

Report | 06/11/2022 4:16 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Gosh, I knew yous was some kinda flatfoot.
*Sizes up Bani-cop*
Well, ya know what they say 'bout curiosity and the cat.... Oh gosh, I mean, shoot! That ain't no threat detective. I were just...uh... Makin' conversation. Yeah, that's it conversation.
*Shoves hands in pockets and rocks back and forth on his feet*
So, uh... What had ya so curious, officer? I weren't breakin' no law was I?

Report | 06/10/2022 5:05 pm

Santino_Piazzi

Hey, I seen ya snoopin' around my joint. You ain't some sorta gumshoe are ya? Cuz, I ain't done nothin' wrong, see. I swear it!

Report | 03/12/2022 9:27 am

XxCountessLuluOfLunacyxX

surprised hey <3 heart
I will def go through your siggy, for your other avis. 4laugh
and I hope you been well. 4laugh
I'm so sorry that I am getting back to you late. sweatdrop
I get overwhelmed by so much PMs and comments that I receive... and plus, I stalk profiles... and the ppl I stalk respond back LOL so it doesn't help sweatdrop
but I do respond back if you are patient ofc <3 hahahaha heart

Report | 02/27/2022 11:15 am

XxCountessLuluOfLunacyxX

wow. I love the Phantom of the Opera.
I also like your profile layout.
and your neo-noir avi, hardboiled detective.
neo-noirs and penny dreadfuls and gothic romances are awesome :') heart

Report | 07/24/2021 9:48 am

Delinquent Sins

blep

Report | 12/23/2020 6:17 pm

Queen of Memories

°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

Y

ou've got this! You've made it this far~

╭♥

Report | 12/23/2020 5:32 pm

Queen of Memories

°˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

A

re you studying a specific time period for your history degree?

╭♥

Report | 12/23/2020 3:02 pm

xXHeadonXx

I'll check it out!
emotion_bigheart

Report | 12/23/2020 2:57 pm

xXHeadonXx

I appreciate you
emotion_bigheart
that has a really good beat
I can see why you like it

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