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Report | 05/14/2010 10:59 am

I know you won't see this for a long time, maybe ever but thsi is going too help me and since you won't see it you won't get mad hopefully. I love you so much Kristin, god I miss you...I've been having awful and terrible nightmares. I am trying soo hard to be your friend and not think of us as boyfriend and girlfriend but after all we have been through, it's hard for me too act as if I was never planning on marrying you. I do mss you and felt like I have taken advantage of you and lost you for the final time. I would give anything too have you back baby, I would literally go to hell and back just to prove how much I love you. The most painful part about this is, you don't wear your ring anymore even though you said you would because of what it meant. It made me feel like you still believed in us but now...I see maybe this will either never happen again or not for a LOOONG time. I can't live in a world without you, I meant everything I told you and I still want to marry you one day and have children with you. I know this isn't your plan anymore and you need too figure yourself out, but please do not make me promise these things again unless you mean it. Or do not promise me things unless you mean it, plans change but that is no excuse to bring up my hopes for a bright future and then take it all back because of uncertainty. PLease do no get mad at this message, I just need to get this out again...because I can't talk too you about this kind of stuff. I found why I my stomach is hurting so much, remember what happens when someone who is totally in love with someone else loses them? They feel like dieing, they hurt physically and cannot eat, can't sleep, can't do even the simplest things without being reminded of there lost love. That's true love, that is what I had with you...I miss it so much and I pray and wish with all my heart that one day, you will come back too me. Kristin...I don't know what too do...I feel so helpless and alone without you. I just need you Kristin, I don't want you I NEEED you, you make the world around me so much brighter and wonderful. Your love for me was so strong at one time I could honestly feel it, I miss that feeling I miss you Kristin. I know you said happy memories help you get through whatever it is you are getting through. MY ONLY real happy memories end in tragedy. Especially the ones of you, they all make me so happy yet they hurt me in the process. BEcause when I think of you, I want to call you and see you and listen to you talk and say how much I love you and just simply love you. I hate how I am not enough and that this realy is my fault, I just wish we could've worked through it and stayed together that day on mothers day. I was so happy with you and willing to just forget it all and start anew...I hope we can do that again someday. I still want to marry you and have children with you, please tell me you still want that too. So I atleast have some hope for the future, because you are all I want and all I need...

I love you so much Jelly

Joshua.

Report | 05/11/2010 5:42 pm

Deadly_Aspertame

http://propagandamatrix.com/forum/index.php/topic,7449.msg20560/boardseen.html#new

Report | 02/01/2010 12:02 am

Old Man Henderson

Wait you play bass? Double bass or bass guitar?

Report | 01/16/2010 7:30 pm

Uni IceHeart

Not much, seeing if I can get an rp of mine going, it looks like it's just us three in the rp right now. You?

Report | 01/16/2010 1:01 pm

Uni IceHeart

Hi

Report | 12/21/2009 9:38 pm

Jack_Of_Shades

Love you baby!

Report | 11/20/2009 6:42 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Well of course I did! It was you!

Report | 11/20/2009 6:30 am

Jack_Of_Shades

You touched me in the perfect way it was soo cool.

Report | 11/20/2009 6:21 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Yes I could, well kind of.
I just enjoyed the touching since it felt nice, I seriously thought I quivered. XD

Report | 11/20/2009 6:08 am

Jack_Of_Shades

smile That makes me feel good too hear. I was trying too prove too you that not all men are assholes, there are still some good one's out there.
Hell back when you where touching me and my tattoo's for the first time I almost quivered. Since it had been a long time since a girl had touched me and one soo attractive was, she was admiring my tattoos. I just loved how you where tracing them and touching me, it was heavenly. ^_^

Report | 11/20/2009 5:58 am

Jack_Of_Shades

I have too say that I thought you where going too be like all the other girls around here and get tired of me after you realize im not an a*****e. But I never thought you where a whore or anything I thought you where really sweet and so pretty. I loved your eyes alot when I first met you, I had a hard time looking you in them if you could tell.

Report | 11/20/2009 5:32 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Well I thank you for that, I mean all I ever wanted from you is love and for you to let me in truely. Only so I could help you and make you feel happier and special about yourself.
Now that I am doing that slowly I feel happy, I love you soo much and want too be with you always.

Report | 11/20/2009 5:06 am

Jack_Of_Shades

I hope it fits your finger. smile
Baby I am willing too do this with you and you're the only one I have tryed too do this with.
You have gotten farther with me than anyone and I want you too be the last woman im with.
I love you more lol
<3

Report | 11/20/2009 4:54 am

Jack_Of_Shades

It is but I wish the diamonds where bigger.
I do hope you like it. <3
I love you too, Kristin.

Report | 11/20/2009 4:47 am

Jack_Of_Shades

It's a silver looking ring with two hearts together and there is a diamond in each heart. Not big but still diamonds.

Report | 11/20/2009 4:27 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Well would you like too know what it is like?

Report | 11/20/2009 4:14 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Well I atleast want you too see me in person and it may be until Christmas until you ge the ring since well...it's not mine just yet. But I will get you something better one day, and I know what you said but I want you too have a ring too be proud of.

Report | 11/20/2009 4:00 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Well see I want to ASK it but I don't exactly have a GOOD ring. I mean it's a great ring but it's not THE BEST! And I am afraid.
Only because I wouldn't ever want too lose you if I asked... I mean I really REALLY love you.

Report | 11/20/2009 3:46 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Baby it's something really important but stupid of me too ask this early in our relationship. Something I want too ask but don't have what I need too give you. Something I normally wait TWO years for...something that I want you too say yes too.

Report | 11/20/2009 3:33 am

Jack_Of_Shades

Just think about it for a minute.

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