» Notation! ♠

» As far as you're aware,

I'm an inexplicable, irrational, lifeless young lass with no better to do than bite nails and consume cereal at home, while avidly observing a monitor.

The cereal part may perhaps be somewhat accurate.

I'm a teenage misanthropist standing at a threatening five feet.
I'm an underachieving black sheep in a herd of pompous-asses.
I'm a little tea pot, short and stout. Let's face it, I'm ******** great.