About

The Stig is the name given to the anonymous racing driver on the BBC motoring show Top Gear. In the show he is cast as a mysterious "tame racing driver" whose identity is unknown, and who never speaks or removes his helmet on camera. Nonetheless he is fully credited as a presenter, albeit as "The Stig", alongside Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May.

The Stig's primary function on the show is to post lap times in various cars around the Top Gear circuit in Dunsfold Park, and to train each week's guest in setting a lap time in the Star in a Reasonably-Priced Car feature on the show. In addition the Stig carries out other driving duties when the need arises.

The Stig's true identity is never revealed on the show, and in order to maintain the secrecy, all shots show him wearing full racing overalls and matching Simpson Diamondback helmet. All that can be seen from the gap between his helmet and jumpsuit is that he is a white male with dark hair. It is also known that he wears Size 10 racing boots as discovered by the Sunday Times when the Driving section wrote an article about the show.

Another source of entertainment for the presenters is the music the Stig listens to while doing Power Laps around the Top Gear track. Often a specific genre will be chosen for one or more series. These have included one-hit wonders, easy listening, prog rock, baroque, advertising jingles, foreign language tapes, romantic novels, and self-help tapes.

Some say...

he never blinks, and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves...

he's wanted by the CIA, and that he sleeps upside down like a bat...

he appears on high value stamps in Sweden, and that he can catch fish with his tongue...

he is illegal in 17 U.S. states, and he blinks sideways...

his breath smells of magnesium, and that he's scared of bells...

he naturally faces magnetic north and that all of his legs are hydraulic...

he lives in a tree and that his sweat can be used to clean precious metals...

his voice can only be heard by cats, and that he has two sets of knees...

he's terrified of ducks, and that there's an airport in Russia named after him...

his skin has the texture of a dolphin's, and that where ever you are in the world, if you tune your radio to 88.4, you can actually hear his thoughts...

he has no understanding of clouds, and that his ear wax tastes like Turkish delight...

his politics are terrifying, and that he once punched a horse to the ground...

his tears are adhesive, and that if he caught fire, he'd burn for a thousand days...

he can swim seven lengths under water, and he has webbed buttocks...

his heart is in upside down, and that his teeth glow in the dark...

his ears aren't exactly where you'd expect them to be, and that once, preposterously, he had an affair with John Prescott...

he has a digital face, and that if he felt like it, he could fire Alan Sugar...

his ears have a paisley lining, and he's been banned from the Chelsea Flower Show...

the outline of his left n****e is exactly the same shape as the Nürburgring, and that if you give him a really important job to do, he'll skive off and play croquet...

he invented Branson Pickle, and that if you insult his mother, he will head-butt you in the chest...

on really warm days, he sheds his skin like a snake, and that for some reason, he's allergic to the Dutch...

his first name really is "The," and that if he went on Celebrity Love Island, they'd all be pregnant including the camera men...

he once threw a microwave oven at a tramp, and long before anyone else, he realized that Jade Goody was a racist pig-faced waste of blood and organs...

he once had a vicious knife fight with Anthea Turner, and that he is in no way implicated in the cash for honours scandal...

if you lick his chest, it tastes exactly the same as piccalilli, and that at this week's Brit awards, he was arrested for goosing Russell Brand...

he sucks the moisture from ducks, and that his crash helmet is modelled on Britney Spears' head...

he isn't machine washable, and all his potted plants are called Steve...

he's banned from the town of Chichester and that in a recent late-night deal, he bought a slightly dented white Fiat Uno from the Duke of Edinburgh...

All we know is, he's called THE STIG.