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poppincherriez Report | 08/05/2009 12:52 pm

:3     


I knew a blonde that was so stupid that…….


- she called me to get my phone number.


- she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because


it said “concentrate.”


- she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make


up her mind.


- she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order.


- she sat on the TV and watched the couch.


- she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.


- she tried to drown a fish.


- she thought a quarterback was a refund.


- she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.


- if you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you’d get change


back.


- they had to burn the school down to get her out of third


grade.


- she tripped over a cordless phone.


- she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.


- at the bottom of the application where it says “sign here”…she put Sagittarius.”


- if she spoke her mind, she’d probably be speechless.


- she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats.


- she sold the car for gas money.


-when she saw the “NC-17″ (under 17 not admitted), she went


home and got 16 friends.


-when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.


-when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.


-when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said “Airport Left” she turned around and went home.











THE END! WAIT THERE'S MORE FOR U TO READ UNTIL U'RE BORED TO DEATH....











next is 101 ways to be annoying (not written by me most are weird)











101 Ways To Be Annoying





1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.





2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sensual massage.”





3. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”





4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting


entirely of “Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip…”





5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while


talking to others.





6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and


then pointing it at the screen.





7. Speak only in a “robot” voice.





8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.





9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that


this is so no one will “swipe your grub.”





10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99


copies.





11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.





12. Sniffle incessantly.





13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.





14. Name your dog “Dog.”





15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather


conditions “to keep them tuned up.”





16. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what YOU think.”





17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your


“astronaut training.”





18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors


upstairs for “violating your airspace.”





19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a


“real hoot.”





20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a


can of Lysol.





21. Practice making fax and modem noises.





22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and “cc:” them to


your boss.





23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.





24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play


along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.





25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the


neighbors you are a “spider person.”





26. Finish all your sentences with the words “in accordance with prophesy.”





27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.





28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward


silences with the impression that you’ll be saying more any moment.





29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.





30. Disassemble your pen and “accidentally” flip the ink cartridge acros

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/12/2009 2:49 pm

yup yur right imma girl, did u mean pink dress? instead of oink dress? its ok i get things messed up 2

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/11/2009 2:27 pm

kinda guessed wat?? srry i got bad memory

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/10/2009 2:18 pm

me 2

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/10/2009 1:59 pm

r u a boy or a girl???

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/10/2009 1:55 pm

hey smelly lunchbox can i call u that??

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/10/2009 1:49 pm

ummm no

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/09/2009 6:43 pm

its ok and my name is fluffygirl91

fluffygirl91 Report | 03/09/2009 6:41 pm

hey wuz up? havent talked 2 u in a while

MirandaSkeeter Report | 02/27/2009 5:54 pm

thanks for buying at my shop