Autobiography OF DOOM!!!!!!

I am bored and I want to talk.
I have been told I sound like Seth Rogan.
I sleep with my comforter inside-out.
I prefer to drink out of glass cups.
I still enjoy playing Pokémon.
I find enjoyment in non-sequiturs.
I should wear my contacts more often.
I like rollercoasters and you should, too.
I write things, terrible things.
I have never been out of this time zone.
I own a pair of Schrodinger's Pants.
I drew a picture of a kitty. (Just trust me on this one.)
I am still Leekspinning.
I Reddit already, so quit bothering me about it.