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Report | 05/22/2022 2:26 pm

blinddivine

OK good. Cause I recognize that I may have mildly melted down on you or at the very least went on a rant. Then, when I didn't hear back from you I misinterpreted myself as being rude and not just you being done with the convo for the moment. I do that sometimes, especially if my thyroid's as off as it's been lately. Dosage finally got upped on that though, so I'm doing a lot better on that front.

To lend a bit more understanding here, I suppose it also reminded me of the time my (ex)therapist blew off a newly given diagnosis of mine from my (ex)psychiatrist b/c "I've known people with xyz, you don't have xyz." Oh, I have xyz and that comment monkey wrenched me to some extent. I could've been working on that s**t so much sooner than later; and she was unintentionally setting me up to have a harder time dealing with it later. I ignored the psychiatrist's diagnosis b/c of my therapist and not liking the psychiatrist, but liking the therapist at the time. I have to do all of it now, as my present self, and not a younger me who could've desperately used that. My ptsd sometimes makes me forget what year I'm living in, so it's nothing on you at all, please know that. You're not either of those people and I think you have more respect for me than that.

If you want to know more about autism from my perspective, I recommend this video. I appreciate you being open to new info and such.

Quote:

openness without fear of rejection is essential to that process.

Yes it is. Truthfully my deepest fear is rejection. Rejection of me, rejection of what comprises me besides me, rejection of every part of myself, and being abandoned or made fun of for it. I know most of that is anxiety and other assorted things, but it's always been hard to to that for multiple reasons. It has gotten a lot easier since my breakdown though. That was one of the worst and best things I've ever done to myself. evil

Gonna finish out this in another post. Maybe we should switch to pm lol I was having a hard time with switching b/c I like my sameness truthfully.

Report | 05/22/2022 12:35 pm

blinddivine

Thanks! I saw an avi like this one, but in offblack and wanted to try my own hand at it in my own way and colors! I really like the colors and set up on yours, very soothing.

I don't know if I need to or not, but if I came of as rude last time we spoke I'm very sorry. I'd never want to be rude to you. I just want to touch base with you on that.

How are you then if my avi fits your mood better than yours does then?

show spoilerhide spoiler

Care to take a look at my latest WIP?

Report | 05/22/2022 11:56 am

blinddivine

Avi is super duper pretty heart

Report | 05/21/2022 10:08 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

whee i hope it goes well.

Report | 05/20/2022 11:15 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

p.s. i love your avi! whee

Report | 05/20/2022 11:14 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

huh, so the graphic is a better indicator of prices to expect?

Report | 05/19/2022 9:28 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

sometimes the same thing happens to me too, but more often i see them at 5x+ the price of the ABP...

Report | 05/19/2022 12:45 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

that would be nice... or maybe seeing if we could get some of the unlisted items in the MP relisted...

Report | 05/19/2022 12:08 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

same for me. i wonder if it's just more people getting onto Gaia or if it's because of people returning to Gaia for the summer?

Report | 05/19/2022 12:03 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

maybe... i don't accept friend requests unless they try to talk to me first... otherwise your adding friends for the sake of adding friends...

Report | 05/19/2022 11:46 am

Wicked Warlocc81

LOL cute! emotion_hug how are you?

Report | 05/18/2022 11:08 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

oooo i like this design you got going on...

Report | 05/17/2022 9:27 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

i like searching for the MP and arenas for avi ideas whee

Report | 05/16/2022 10:00 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

yes and no...i like being able to create so many cool avi and have people compliment me on them, but i'm starting to feel the effects of creation burnout.

Report | 05/15/2022 10:28 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

only for Mer-May. normally i have a new avi weekly,(Mon-Fri) and on the weekend i switch to a random mermaid avi i've shown before.
i'm doing more for May because i wanted to challenge myself and see if i come up with new ideas.

Report | 05/14/2022 10:09 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

true, and i hope this site lasts for a while. i like it here.

hey, we are! LOL but i'm changing midnight tomorrow.

Report | 05/13/2022 10:10 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

...still wish i found this site earlier...

Report | 05/12/2022 10:32 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

LOL i was still in elementary school and moving around at the time...

Report | 05/11/2022 9:53 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

i like this site... wish i found out about it when i was still in high school...

Report | 05/10/2022 10:12 pm

Wicked Warlocc81

maybe later, and i might look around there for new avi ideas...

thank you! whee i like showing what i made to people.

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