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The Silver BulletinEXTRA! DR. MANIAC SPOTTED IN HORRORLAND!
by Harry Knight, Cub Reporter
WEREWOLF VILLAGE - HorrorLand officials are keeping their lips sealed, but The Silver Bulletin confirms that Dr. Maniac has been spotted as recently as this morning!
"He was just all over the place," said a Monster Police official who wished to remain anonymous. "He kept babbling about some nutty ice show and some kid named Ronnie...or maybe it was Robby."
Dr. Maniac---who wears a leopard skin cape, yellow gloves, and yellow feathered boots---was first spotted around ten a.m. jumping out of a large video screen in Zombie Plaza. As frightened shoppers ran for cover, they heard him yell, "I'm as free as a flamingo in an opera house!" before disappearing with a loud pop.
When we tried to contact HorrorLand's offices for a comment, all we got was this recording: "HorrorLand has no idea what you're talking about. Everything is fine. Stop calling us."
Dr. Maniac has also been spotted throwing snowballs off the roof of Stagger Inn, trying to freeze all the water in the Bottomless Canoe Ride, and building an igloo near the entrance to Werewolf Village. Werewolf officials are urging every man, wolf, and cub to stay inside their cottages until further notice.
"I don't know where he came from," said Stagger Inn's Linda the Cleaning Lady, "but he sends a chill down my spine. And that's not easy to do, since my spine is about eight feet long.
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RIDERS SPEND HOURS STUCK ON BOTTOMLESS CANOE RIDE
By Wolf Blister
BLACK LAGOON WATER PARK---About twenty guests got more than they bargained for when they climbed into ther canoes this morning. Instead of the usual terrifying trip down a man-made river, they sat for hours---freezing their bottoms off in blocks of solid ice created by Dr. Maniac. It took rescuers hours to reach the stranded...
[[ Thank you for typing this all up, N!! ]]
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Hey, don't chip the paint! stressed
It's better than being a worthless, goofy-looking clown! scream
*panics, turns, and jumps. Grabs Dr. Maniac's leopard skin cape and climbs up it. Doesn't want to be anywhere near the ground if there are termites nearby*
You just don't have my charm with the ladies.
Don't hesitate to drop in. twisted