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After going on an angry rampage ive finally calmed down, and things are well. school is coming to a close and i get to move on for high school. i come on every other day and i always have PMs but i know its nothing important or any long lost friend, but surprisingly it doesnt sadden me, i just read someones request for me to vote for them and move on, it seems i have no friends anymore but thats alright. i thought about making more but this time things will be different, and maybe if i ever do have one of the few gaia relationships ill be more carful or just not, seems that person is upset im not on 24/7 but i have a life, and a pretty damn good one. ive come out of my shell and made something of myself. gaia isnt what it used to be so im in no rush to return, but if anyone stumbles over this, say hello 3nodding heart
Nyssa` · Thu May 04, 2006 @ 06:33am · 1 Comments |
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I sat down and really thought about it, i overreacted and i shouldnt waste my feelings on someone who doesnt feel them for me, im sort of back, but not much i dont really have a place to go, but will see how everything works out
Nyssa` · Wed Mar 01, 2006 @ 01:11am · 0 Comments |
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Just when i try to hold on to everything things just get worse all over again, i have absolutly nothing left on this site so whats the point of staying? i dont know but im not going to make it a huge scene and s**t like that. I know what i have and i know what i dont. Im most likly going to start fresh on a mule and pop up on random places i used to go. im pretty sure that no one will read this, but just in case you wonder what ever happened to that girl. Now you know.
Nyssa` · Sat Feb 18, 2006 @ 06:14am · 3 Comments |
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I know your jealous of this sheet beetchs
thanks to bunny
Nyssa` · Mon Jan 30, 2006 @ 12:05am · 0 Comments |
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In a way im back but its nothing to tell lol im so bored!
Im tired of being in the exchange but without it i have no place else to go. so ill wander off and end up right back where i started.
Nyssa` · Thu Jan 12, 2006 @ 07:26am · 0 Comments |
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Today was up and down...
Ups were good and Downs were well.. down..
I think its ending on a steep down..
Nyssa` · Fri Aug 19, 2005 @ 05:03am · 0 Comments |
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Cherry hates me ^__^
Nyssa` · Tue Aug 09, 2005 @ 08:24pm · 1 Comments |
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I think..
My relationship with Orchid is starting to fall apart.
How can this be? I think i let it slip from right under me.
I saw what was happening but i couldnt open my mouth. And even now it seems hard to even have the most basic conversation with my Husband//.[Wife].
Can i really handle taking this ring off my finger? Or will i find comfort in darkness as ive done so many times before?
Im sorry i was a bad Wife Orchid. I know i could have done better. But if i would have taken the time to truly realize what was happening and done something. Besides sit back and watch it crumble with my b***h attitude. I only seem to care when things begin and end.
But im afraid this might just be the beginning of the end. As i find myself thinking about it more and more.
I never spent time with you, yet got mad whenever you said you had to go. I never visited you at all in the forums yet i complained about how there was nothing to do. You told me your problems and all i ever did was say i was sorry, and hoped the conversation moved on. You trusted me with you heart countless times but i knew somehow i would only break it again. When you kissed me i never kissed back. When you told me you loved me and i simply replied with a Love You Too.
You stayed with me for god knows how long and never once complained, you never pushed me away, you never stopped loving me and i truly dont understand. I treated you so badly and yet i still had your eternal love. Weeks went by without any attempt to give you the slightest bit of affection and yet your heart never went astray..
I doubt i will ever understand you, and why out of all the people who are here it is me who stood next to you on that special day, and when i complain, somehow you put the blame on yourself, though as clear as day its my fault. Ill ask you countless questions with me being so curious to why you do the things you do. You never know lol and never have a clue, but give me a kiss..tell me you love me and simply move on.
You inspire me to do so well but yet i doubt ill ever change. I know ive done you wrong, and one more than one occasion ive seen your tears steam down those pale cheeks, but i want you to know. Orchid. David. My Husband.
Im Sorry...
Truly, Deeply, Eternally.
Nyssa`
Nyssa` · Fri Jul 22, 2005 @ 08:03am · 2 Comments |
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Slipknot - Vermillion Pt. 2 |
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She seemed dressed in all of me, stretched across my shame. All the torments and the pain, leak through and covered me. I'd do anything to have her to myself, just to have her for myself. Now I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do When she makes me sad.
She is everything to me, the unrequited dream, the song that no one sings, the unattainable. She's a myth that I have to believe in, all I need to make it real is one more reason.
I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do When she makes me sad.
But I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me.
A catch in my throat, Choke, Torn into pieces, I won't, no, I don't want to be this, But I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me, I won't let this build up inside of me.
She isn't real, I can't make her real. She isn't real, I can't make her real.
Nyssa` · Fri Jul 15, 2005 @ 11:32pm · 0 Comments |
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