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I no longer have a father...

im so.. its kinda a long story but.

one day my dad randomly called me and said that he was going to kill my dog, shoot him in the backyard. Before I could ask him he hung up. I panicked and called my boyfriend and told him that we needed to go to my dads and save my dog. as we were driving I called my brother and told him what was happening, he said he was on his way to go talk to him.

when I got there i told my boyfriend to stay out side and that i would try to talk my dad into taking the dog. when I got inside I saw a torn up box for a new cell phone from Tmoble. I guess the dog found the box and was chewing on it to entertain itself when we weren't home. anyway so i go into my dads room and he's all angry and saying stuff like, that dog is dead, he's lucky I only hit it with the bat and didn't shoot his a** right here. and Im trying to tell my dad to calm down and lay in bed, that it was just a phone and we could buy a new one.

he gets angry and tells me that it wasn't just a phone and that he isn't gonna let that dog live anymore. so I told him Id take him with me for the night, or if that he wanted id find him a new home. he said to me that the dog wasn't going to leave this house alive and that if i took him he'd shoot him. I got angry and started shouting at my dad what the hell is wrong with him and why the hell can't he just be his old self. and he would say, stop summer, your going to make me do something I don't want to.

I told him at this point that I was going to take the dog no matter what he said. so I grabbed the dogs leash and started for the dog. as soon as I got the harness on my dog grabbed him by his neck and kept pulling, I held onto him with all my might and didn't let go, shouting to my dad to go back to his room and calm down.

my dad gave up trying to pull him away from me and went to his room for a few seconds. when I came back he had a gun in his hands. I froze for a moment and decided to cover the dog with my whole body and told my dad to back off and that I was taking the dog with me. my dad said move I'm going o kill him right now summer you better let go.

I didn't and just help onto him. my dad got angrier and broke a bunch of stuff in the house and I run outside with the dog. My boyfriend loaded up the dog in the car and we left. i called my brother and told him what happened and he said that this is crazy and that he would talk to dad. Later I found out that my brother also called my grandpa to talk t my dad also.

I kept my dog for one night, hearing threats and mean words from my dad over the phone. I told him that when he was calmed down and that after my brother had talk to him he could call and talk to me again. but then my brother told me to give the dog back. that my dad promised not to try to kill him anymore.

I did reluctantly and went to school the next day. My dad called me and said we needed to talk, so I went over and waited till he got home, I called my brother and asked what went wrong why did this happen. and he told me that our dad was leaving, that he was done being apart of the family and didn't want to be our dad anymore.

At that moment my dad came home so i sat and listened to him basically tell me how disappointed and horrible I am as a daughter. and heard him say that he was going to avoid me and everyone else for a while. that I could stay at his house but he would move int the garage or something so that he didn't have to see my face. after al he said, he asked if I had anything to say. I just said I was sorry.. there was nothing I could do.

I got up and left, but he stopped me and made sure that I wasn't going o kill myself or anything. I thought about it really, I wanted to. but i told him i made a promise to him after my first attempt years before that I wouldn't. I drove to my moms, called her and her husband on the phone. I apologized for all my actions and told them that i didn't have a dad anymore.

they told me to come home and that my aunt would watch me so I didn't do anything drastic. So i cried with my aunt and my sister and wished for something to just take me away.

after like two weeks my dad called and said we should talk again, he said he was sorry and that he was coming back. I was happy and yet very angry but i didn't say anything. and now me and him live as if nothing happened. as if none of this hurt me deeply inside. how i wished to die more than anything. I don't talk to him anymore about how I feel, i tell him i don't want to make him angry with me, or burden him with my stupid life. i do everything he says without question as to avoid his anger.

my boyfriend and friend hate that I still see him, but he was my dad.. how can you tell a child their favorite parent is crazy and bad for them, that you should abandon them and give up on them. most people don't have fathers or mothers.. And.. I love my daddy very much...

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