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Yeah. Woah. It's kinda weird. I was talking to a friend while I did the whole avatar overhaul, and realized that I more or less have kept my gaia avatar as a reflection of my rl self since first joining gaia oh-so-long ago. Like the pony tail was because that used to be how I almost always wore my hair in high school. But now my avatar looks pretty much nothing like me. Which makes me wonder if I'm going to change my rl self, or if my avatar no longer represents myself as much as the changes I'm undergoing or an idealized person I'd like to be. More importantly, I think my avatar looks hella wicked. 003 whee
Silva N. Leona · Wed Mar 12, 2008 @ 12:14am · 0 Comments |
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Definitely haven't written here in a while. Hm. I'm at college now, which is incredibly awesome. Well, it'd be perfectly awesome without the homework and tests, but then it wouldn't be college. It's really amazing though. Thinking back on the whole college app process and having no idea where to go, I've realized that I can't imagine being anywhere else. I can't imagine life without the people I've met here and the friends I've made.
Another thing that's mind-blowing is the change. The signs of it are just....everywhere. I'm changing, college is changing, life is changing, the people around me are changing--there's just so much change. Yet as exhilarating and exciting as that is, part of me is incredibly scared that nothing will ever stay the same. And honestly, few things ever do.
But when I'm eating dinner with my favorite people or hanging out with dormmates til godforsaken hours, I can see that the fear is pointless. Life is change. To live, to be human is to be part of an ever-moving, chaotic process of growth. And that's okay. So long as there are friends to grin at, family to love, and people to hug along the way, the uncertainty is bearable. It's the only way.
Silva N. Leona · Fri Jan 18, 2008 @ 07:14pm · 0 Comments |
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Right, so I guess I'm officially an alumni. ..... Doesn't feel that different. I wasn't really expecting it to be, which is probably why I didn't get ridiculously excited for graduation. I was actually more excited for grad night. Now THAT was awesome. whee Fie on the broken wave pool though. xp
Yet, even though I wasn't expecting anything, I somehow get the feeling I should be feeling something. But I don't. Heck, the separation, sorrow, etc., should be kicking right now, shouldn't it? B/c knowing me, it will. I mean, you don't just leave a place where you spent 4 years of your life w/o so much as a tear, right? Well, that only applies to people who don't inherently dislike our school with a passion, I suppose.
Meh. Back to that bloody focus program. There's something about that application tat refuses to be finished, I swear. emo
Silva N. Leona · Sun May 27, 2007 @ 12:21am · 1 Comments |
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Happy Death-to-the-non-verdant-clothed! |
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Heaven forbid I actually call a holdiay by its name, y'know?
Not too much to say, I suppose. As usual, I should be reading my AP gov. Oh, and I didn't get that speech award. 1st place went to a girl who was definitely not that great and a guy who definitely deserved the position and more. That's how life goes though, and I didn't walk away empty-handed, so that was nice.
Oh, and I kind of need to go to college now. Like NOW. And I know in a couple of months I'm going to be all ' I WANNA GO BACK TO HS. WAH.' But that's another thing you can always count on in life: wanting to do anything, be anywhere than where you are right now. The joy of human nature.
Watched 300 yesterday. Not bad as movies go, and it will resonate with a lot of people since many of its themes tie back into the good ol' American ideals of freedom and equality. However, I will remain at least somewhat disturbed by any movie in which the males generally have bigger chests than the females. On that note, talk about a ridiculous amount of n****e nudity; males, females, and those that made ya wonder (I'm looking at you, Xerxes. confused ) In any case, a fun Friday afternoon with friends and acquaintances.
In conclusion: College letters should be coming in a week or so. AH.
Silva N. Leona · Sun Mar 18, 2007 @ 04:05am · 2 Comments |
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So, finally came back from the academic decathlon meet. Man. Can't believe its finally over. All that studying, and now it's done. I'll miss it for its own little sweet ways, but can't say I'll dislike the free time.
Only thing tugging at my heartstrings is that speech bit. xp Gah. Really. I've never wanted an award for a speech this bad. Not even at actual speech tournaments. I mean, even though some jerk took off with my schedule that had my speech in it while I was in the bathroom, it stayed in my head, and I NAILED THAT SUCKER. The judges even responded in all the right ways! Ditto for impromptu speech, and that's the most unprediictable. Started strong, heart-tugging, easily sympathizable content for the parent judges, ended strong. AT EXACTLY TWO MINUTES. Eat your heart out, time limits. But apparently, the speeches aren't supposed to be too dramatic. To which I say, bloody friggin' hell. They should be rewarding people for speeches with actual feeling. You know, being human and all, and being able to express yourself isn't a crime or anything. Gaaaaaah. Just one award in that category, I don't even care if its third. Puh-leez, God. crying If that could be part of your great, universal scheme, that would kick a** so hard.
Silva needs to stop thinking about Acadeca speeches now. emo
Silva N. Leona · Sun Feb 04, 2007 @ 03:48am · 1 Comments |
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happy holidays and all that... |
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Yep. Merry Christmas, etc. Having a lovely, low-key time with the family at home. However, installing the software for the new creative zen I got (yaaaay.) is being a bit of a b***h. Apparently my version of microsoft won't support it, so I've gotta install this other crud, and then I'm not sure what kind of downloading system to use. 00( Silva just wants to listen to music. Ah wells, at least I've got one rather than none. Hope everyone else is having a kick-a** holiday time. 3nodding
Silva N. Leona · Mon Dec 25, 2006 @ 10:39pm · 0 Comments |
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Yeah. Silva's back in America. AND SHE WANTS TO GO BACK TO JAPAN. (>.< wink Maybe because me returning means that school is starting again, whatever. Fact remains, it was a fantastic experience, I love all the counselors I met, and I'll never forget my campers. (^.^)
Just thinking of my last entry. I got my swimsuit tanned on me that day. My butt was a completely different shade than the rest of my body. And I had a pale stripe on my hip. Literally. Yeah, it was real hit in the hot springs we went to afterwards. Heh, you know I really like those Japanese baths. Never feel lonely, got those movable shower heads, and a nice soak in a hot bath afterwards. Yay for America's tiny, lonely showers. emo
Silva N. Leona · Wed Aug 16, 2006 @ 07:31am · 0 Comments |
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sigh. What is it about foreign countries that just ups the awesome factor on birthdays? Chilling on the beach of Iwojima today with some counselor buddies and my host family. Oh yeah. Going to come back several shades darker, but if I`m lucky I`ll be able to take several ganders of some nice Japanese six-packs. 003 mmmm. Wishing my American buds were here, and lots of love to them......
Silva N. Leona · Mon Jul 17, 2006 @ 01:34am · 0 Comments |
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XX3 WOOT. times 3, if you must. |
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so, again with the sporadic journalling. But hey, this time this is pretty darn important. Silva Leona is making one heckuva trip to Japan. yayzies all around. which is why this entry will end now. *needs to finish packing*
Silva N. Leona · Thu Jun 22, 2006 @ 02:47am · 0 Comments |
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