The first cut
wasn't the deepest.
no, not at all.
It was like all the others,
A subtle rend of anxious skin,
a gentle pulse of crimson,
just enough to hush the demons
shrieking in my brain.
But this time they wouldn't
shut up. Just kept up
howling like mama,
when she was in a bad way.
Worst thing was, the older
I got, the more I began to see
how much I resembled Mama,
falling in and out of the blue,
then lifting up into the white.
That day I actually
thought about howling.
So I gave myself to the knife,
asked it to bite a little deeper.
THe hot scarlet rush felt so delicious
I couldn't stop there.
The blade might have reached
bone, but my little
brother, Bryan,
Barged into the bathroom,
found me leaning against
Grandma's new porcelain
tub, turning its unstained
white pink.
You should
have heard
him scream.
wasn't the deepest.
no, not at all.
It was like all the others,
A subtle rend of anxious skin,
a gentle pulse of crimson,
just enough to hush the demons
shrieking in my brain.
But this time they wouldn't
shut up. Just kept up
howling like mama,
when she was in a bad way.
Worst thing was, the older
I got, the more I began to see
how much I resembled Mama,
falling in and out of the blue,
then lifting up into the white.
That day I actually
thought about howling.
So I gave myself to the knife,
asked it to bite a little deeper.
THe hot scarlet rush felt so delicious
I couldn't stop there.
The blade might have reached
bone, but my little
brother, Bryan,
Barged into the bathroom,
found me leaning against
Grandma's new porcelain
tub, turning its unstained
white pink.
You should
have heard
him scream.
