I feel so sick to my stomach...... and I want to cry but i'm trying to hold it back..........
I don't understand why I feel this way. Maybe it's just a combination of every little thing that hurts me in my life, but... if so it's stupid. I wish it would just go away. No matter what I do i'm never happy. I thought if I got a boyfriend I would be happy, I did, I wasn't, I broke up with him, whatever. I thought if I was skinnier i'd be happy, I lost weight I got skinnier, i'm not happy... Maybe I just need the physical contact with someone......
So I guess that's next....... but if i'm not happy after this... i'm going to give up and just assume that it's pretty much impossible..
I should just kill myself so I don't have to feel like this anymore. So I don't have to feel at all, ever again.
MissSDD · Fri Jan 14, 2005 @ 03:22pm · 0 Comments |