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The random, generally-but not always-happy thoughts of a hyper anime radio ninja cat-girl/lint ball.
Whee, read me yes yes. Reeaad. You know you want to. Fine, be that way. Don't read. See if I care. *curls up in a corner and cries*
UGH!
Today was sucktacular.

That means it rocked. And sucked butt. At the same time.

As far as the rockage goes...I got new stuff today! Girly stuff. biggrin

Eye shadow and mascara, from Avon. And stuff from Victoria's Secret...bras and panties (lol) and YUMMY lip gloss. <33

The suckage...

I've been bingeing all day. After breakfast, I pulled out a bag of Baked Lays, thinking, "oh, these aren't so bad, even if I eat a lot it won't hurt me!" I ate half the bag. Then I went to my room and was all like "foodfoodfood, moremoremore, morefoodmorefoodmorefood!!!" I finished my choco King Tut pop thing, my Pucca, ate some Pocky, then pulled out my box of GoGo grahams and started--rather literally--stuffing my face. I wasn't hungry...just craving food. I kept stuffing the chocolate graham cookies into my mouth, more and more, until I could hardly even taste them. I was really thirsty, but I kept eating.

Then I stopped, went downstairs and got a drink, came back up and ate the cookie that was on my dresser...then started crying. Just...kind of out of nowhere. I've never cried before like that because of my eating...but I was really mad at myself for completely losing control like that.

If I had waited 20 minutes after eating those chips, none of that would have happened, because that's about when we left for the mall.

After I got home I ate two tacos from Chipotle's, and half of my Mrs. Field's cookie sandwich. I wasn't that hungry to begin with.

I went upstairs and got depressed again...texted on my cell...went downstairs to do the dishes. While I was down there I started craving more sugar, so I ate half of what was left of the cookie thing.

Then I was really, really full. Why do I keep eating like this?

I really, really, really think I have a problem. If I told my mom, would she believe me? Or just tell me that I should try harder...to think more while I'm eating?

But I do...I think "if you always eat like this, you're gonna get fat. You should stop eating, you know you'll regret it later."

But I can't.

Blahblahblahlongentry.





 
 
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