hum,... yah i know im on gaia again stare stare i just cant do my HWs ... so here it is blaugh
Homework Policy
Here is an explanation of our homework policy :
Students should not spend more than 90 minutes per night. The time should be budgeted in the following manner:
* 15 minutes looking for assignment
* 11 minues calling a friend for the assignment
* 23 minutes explaining to parents why the teacher is mean and just does not like children
* 8 minutes in the bathroom
* 10 minutes getting a snack
* 7 minutes checking the TV Guide
* 6 minutes telling parents that the teacher never explained the homework
* 10 minutes sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom to do the assignment
Long Term Assignments:
These are given the night before they are due. This explains the name "long term." It is a long term commitment to time that begins at 9:30 PM and ends at 11:50 PM. It is important that the whole family is involved in the project. It is imperative that at least one family member race to WalMart for posterboard, and that one family member ends up in tears (does not have to be the student).
One parent needs to stay up and complete the project. The other parent needs to call the school and leave a message that the student is out sick.
It is not necessary to have the student's name on the assignment.
rofl rofl rofl
"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet.
"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the teacher with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."
heart heart heart
The teacher brings a statue of Venus into class and asks, "What do you like best about it, class? Let's start with you, Robert."
"The artwork," says Robert.
"Very good. And you, Peter?"
"Her tits!" says Peter.
"Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall," responds the teacher with disgust. "And you, Johnny?"
"I'm leaving, teacher, I'm leaving..."
lol lol lol
"The problems for the exam will be similar to those discussed in class. Of course, the numbers will be different. But not all of them..... Pi will still be 3.14159..."
lol lol lol
When you walk into the classroom and say good morning...
When they say good morning back, it's Freshmen.
When they put their newspapers down and open their books, it's Sophomores.
When they look up so they can see the instructor over the tops of the newspapers, it's juniors.
When they put their feet up on the desks and keep reading, it's seniors.
When they write it down, it's graduate students.
heart heart heart
The teacher is droning away in the classroom when he notices a student sleeping way up in the back row. The teacher shouts to the sleeping student's neighbor, "Hey wake that student up!"
The neighbor yells back, "You put him to sleep, you wake him up!"
heart heart heart
The ways to grade the final exams
Dept of Statistics:
All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve.
Dept of Psychology:
Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind.
Dept of History:
All students get the same grade they got last year.
Dept of Religion:
Grade is determined by God.
Dept of Philosophy:
What is a grade?
Law School:
Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A.
Dept of Logic:
If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A else the student will not receive an A.
Dept of Computer Science:
Random number generator determines grade.
Music Department:
Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note (+ and - would be sharp and flat respectively).
Dept of Physical Education:
Everybody gets an A.
heart heart heart
No Homework Excuses
"I lost it fighting this kid that said you weren't the best teacher in school" cool i call that a**-kissing lol
"Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked" lol
"I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to your already heavy workload" another a**-kissing lol
"My little sister ate it" =_=;; IT HAPPENS!!!!! I SWEAR!!!!! my cat destroyed it once too stare no one wanted to believe me.... things like that really do happen....
o8luna8o Community Member 
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Community Member