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There`s a chair in my room. I swear. I know when you look around, you don`t see anything, but I tell you, right there, next to your foot, there is a chair.
Watch, I can sit on it. Do you honestly think I`m floating in mid-air?
s**t, you do, don`t you?
No! Put away that camera. I`m trying to prove that there`s a chair here, not that I can float in mid-air.
No, I am not admitting I can float in mid-air.
Wait a second--stop that! You can`t just try and distract me like that. I`m indistractable, do you see? See this indistractable skill. That`s not very nice, trying to distract people. Hasn`t your mother ever told you that?
No? Really, I think she should. It`s a law...or something. Call her.
Haha! You fell for that, you loser. Now I have your precious camera. And now I can delete that photo. Cue evil laughing.
Oh, you want your camera back? Too bad. There`s a chair in my room. Believe me, damn it.
Wait, how do I delete photos on this stupid piece of junk?!
Stop laughing at me! It`s not funny.
Why are you laughing even harder?
It`s not.
Funny, I mean.
Stop it.
Stop it.
Oh come on. I`ll give you your stupid camera back if you stop laughing at me, and promise to delete that photo.
Pinkie promise?
Okay, I choose to believe you. If I see any pictures of me floating in mid-air, I`m blaming you.
No, I am not admitting there is no chair in my room.
Yes, whatever I say. Now you`ve got it right.
Anyways, there`s a chair in my room.
I know I said that. But you don`t believe me, so I`m repeating it. Maybe if I repeat it enough, you`ll believe me. I heard that works.
Where did I hear that? I don`t know...places. Maybe from the chair.
Yes, I know chairs can`t talk. But I`m trying to prove a point here. There`s a chair in my room.
Put down the phone. It`s not funny.
You think you`re such a comedian, calling a asylum.
Ha ha. So funny.
Okay, that`s enough with the joking.
Stop it now.
I`m serious.
Oh, you have a secret you want to tell me? Why should I listen to you? You don`t listen to me.
Okay, so technically you listen to me, but you don`t believe me.
Fine, tell me the stupid secret. Stop pouting.
...No. I don`t believe you.
You`re real, damn it.
I`m not insane.
Yes, I...think I`m sure.
Stop it. Please.
Stop it.
I can feel you.
I`m not insane, and there really is a chair in my room.
No, wait, please don`t leave me.
No one else talks to me. Heck, no one else even visits me.
Sometimes I bang on the walls, hoping to annoy someone into visiting. But the walls are too spongy...they make no noise.
And it just ends up making my head hurt, because my hands are restricted by my jacket. But it`s very high fashion, and, to tell you the truth, it`s too tight for me to take off.
...Oh, you left.
I didn`t even notice.
I think I`ll sit on the chair again.
It is real. Really.
I don`t know why no one believes me.
Mascara Maniac · Sun Jul 10, 2011 @ 07:07am · 0 Comments |
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