Tag...?
I had to get out...I had to get away...I had to find a peace of mind...the shadows of the night offered that to me. Seeing the antique lit streetlamps shine like matchsticks lighting the streets made it feel as though I were were in a limbo everything just surreal as anytime after such when you think about nothing but the whirlwinds of life. But it was strange because this night seemed to be so peacful...It was like an escape from reality yet a new understanding to what MY reality was...and is. What I've thought, done, the things I say, they all reflect on a part of who I am as well as the things I don't say. And in that aspect its hard to find out whether or not you really are what you think you are. Seening these lights, made me feel at peace and a rush at the same time. I start walking briskly through, in and out the obleque shadows of the night and the darkness looming in the shadows casted by the streetlamps. Everything...so vivid...so clear...I see the pond and its huge water lit fountain smack dab in the middle of the lake. Like a beacon, I was drawn to it the moment I saw it. Picking up an even quicker pace, I haul it to move like all hell towards it like its a sense of hope, listening only to the music from my music player pounding in my eardrums...who knew the song Chasing Cars could be so moving? I stop right in front of the pond, looking out to the fountain light, seeing the old trail I had walked so many times past in my years during times of torment, wonder, thrills, and peace. Looking at the darkened path hidden dark and shrouding figures of blackened trees in the night. I look up at the sky to see...everything is so clear...vividly clear, a painful sort of realization that I cannot seem to comprehend yet know I must. I walk on.
It is painful to realize what I realized all in that one moment, yet so wonderous to actually finally realize "this is what it meant...". The images, memories, thoughts, everything comes into play. It was all so compromisingly wonderful? Yet...not?
Walking on, I keep pace with the music that pounds my ears to the point of linebreaking base, mind set on the goal; the trail. Running now I hoof it to where I get to the wooden post that marks the start of the trail, debating whether or not to take it, on basic whim looking at the haunted water tower to the east, or west? I couldnt tell it was night and I had never bothered to pay which direction it was ever but looking at the darkened titanic figure in the dark. Realizing that it was nothing in comparison to the sky surrounding it, I walk on. Sooo many strange realizations hit me in that one moment. That I was actually alive and able to sense what others might not sense or I might just be delusional, but whatever it was, it was amazing. I felt...free.
More free than I had felt in a LONG time. I embraced it in time and in also in perfect synchronization to the song...the one that kept repeating over and over again. I felt it more in that one moment than I had in a long time, something that made sense, yet not, clarification, crystal clear...I was a numbskull...that was my realization. Strange you might say? But of course just how it is, nothing in life ever makes sense unless you look at things differently but look at things too differently and too vastly, you may just wind up getting even more confused than before without even truly finding any answers to what your looking for.
Running/walking steadily forward on the windy darkway lit path-everything in my line of sight seemed to be outlined almost perfectly, though Im supposedly "blind"- and went along the way until out of the darkness I see a shadow moving closer and closer to my general direction. I didnt feel any sense of fear, just wariness and stopped moving to get a better sense of what it might be. It was...a man walking his two pomeranian puppies out on a late night stroll. Staying away and nodding as he went past, I just laughed out loud, not knowing how loud I might be because of the music blasting but didn't care. Going along my merry little way, I just felt all at that moment...that I was being watched. Whether I was or not I didn't care, I was unafraid yet cautious lighter ready in hand. What good that would do me.
Something completed me at that moment just walking across the creek bridge was something on its own like a new discovery, like I was running with the shadows of the night...repetitive of me to say I know but thats what they were the things in my head that made me feel so aware of my surroundings.
CrushCrushCrush by Paramore was playing by the time I finished crossing the bridge to the other last wooden post, marking the end of the trail, but not the end of my walk. I walked past a house that had its windows wide open, tv glaring from the inside. Wonder what they would have thought if they had seen the dark hooded figure walking past their window towards the light...before taking off her hood at the lampost to paus the music, to hear reality...nothing but a faint ringing and haunted clarity that felt so right. After several moments...time to move on.
Playing the music again, CrushCrushCrush playing on my brain, I wheel it speedwalking towards home with a different sort of vigor, the fighting kind, the kind that won't allow you to back down no matter what comes your way. Funny how things can work like that.
Looking up towards the sky again I see the stars peeking through the darkest clouds and the ones illuminated by the city lights. Few in between but grateful for the ones that shone. Heeling it I walked towards the next upcoming light, the one where my friend Ashe had thought she had seen the ghost of a child from two Halloweens past. Looking that light in front of the driveway of the house, I didnt see, but felt an eerie familiarity...and ran for it...to that light. Nothing but reassurance broke through as I touched that lamp. Grinning to myself I move on and run the long way home, the whole time thinking "wow I am a numbskull" whilst grinning like the dork I knew all too well that I was.
Moving past the last light, I turn the corner each light like a hovering halo blur as they moved past, making my mad dash home end in a goofy stupor...walking the last block still listening to CrushCrushCrush. Everything comes at me again in that second and my focus points me towards the next light...there's a metallic marking making itself known in the almost unnrealistic light. I grin again touch it quickly and move on again; tag...I was home.
Uzumaki Strife Community Member 
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