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Join Me in My Struggle For Life
All I Wanted Was You(Feb 05 2010)
I like you more yesterday, but I'm not saying that i love you less now. I never asked for you completely. All I wanted was for you to stay. You can hurt me in any way you want to, I will let you, just don't leave me. I know that what I'm doing now is stupid, it is foolish, and I know it is selfish. Things change and I guess people do change too. I hope that you are not one of those who will soon go apart from me. But I guess you are. And if that day comes, my world will fall apart. I learned to live my life with you. My world revolved only around you. Everything I am now is because of you. And what I do best is to love you. I cant imagine my future if you are not included there. Whenever we fight, I go crazy. And whenever you leave me, I go weak. As if a part of me was taken away. I will never leave you, and I don't want you to leave me too. I know, i feel, that you don't love me now the way you loved me before. But, can you at least pretend? I will continue living in my fantasy if its the only way I can have you. But, lets go back to reality. I am not against skateboarding. All I wanted was a little part of your time. I'm not being selfish, I'm just being ignored. But since you are the one who said that I am a hindrance to your game...I decided to learn how to live without you. From this day on, I will try to not be dependent on you. But I'm not saying I will learn to not love you. I am just preparing for the day that you will leave me. I can feel a separation coming on. I want you to be happy. But for you to be happy, you have to be free. You don't need me in your life. You don't want me there either. I wanted our relationship to last, but I guess it won't. I really don't know that is with you that I'm crazy like this. I know I've said this a million times before...I'll never let this go. But just like in the song..."I'll never let this go, but now I feel like I don't know you." Yes, I don't know you anymore. It seems that, you are not the same person I feel for. Yet, I'm still in love with you. My friends pity me. That I am stuck in such a bittersweet romance. But I am not stuck, this is exactly where I want to be. Skating can be the sports of your life, but it can never be your life. Soon you will have to grow up, and throw up all your childish dreams.You will realize that there is more to life than your own happiness. That, not only yourself matters, not only your opinion will need to be heard. That not all things that toy do, which makes you happy, will do good to others too. You will have to take care of others, value them, and consider them with every decision you will make. Life is not just about having fun. And when that time comes, that you're already a grown man:honest, caring, respectful and mature. I hope I'm still by your side to say "I am proud of you..I've always been". But if I'm not the girl whose by your side at that time, I'll still be proud of you. I am even willing to wait for an eternity if it is just time that you need to love me again. I am just a little girl, unwanted and unloved, a little girl who doesn't know her place in this world, a little girl that only wants to love you, and to be lobed by you.


Sacrifices has been made, too much time was wasted, gallons of tears already fell from my eyes.And too much love from myself was given to you. If more time is what you need for you to be proud of me. I'm willing to wait. Even if it takes forever.I love you so much, with my whole heart. So I'll stay here and wait for you.





nAmi03
Community Member
nAmi03
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