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I got this from one of my many sites that I visit. I didn't write it, and it's purely for entertainment. In no way was it created to offend or harm anything or anyone. Pretty much, It's a joke. Laugh at it.


THE MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE BIBLE

x. Gerard Way puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

x. Mikey Way can slam revolving doors.

x. The chief export of The Frank Iero is pain.

x. Mikey Way counted to infinity.........twice.

x. Frank Iero can divide by zero.

x. The grass is always greener on the other side. Unless Gerard Way has been there, then it's soaked with tears and blood.

x. Frank Iero once visited The Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

x. Gerard Way sleeps with a night light. Not because Gerard Way is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Gerard Way.

x. Mikey Way is the reason Waldo is hiding.

x. A Tsunami is water running away from Bob Bryar.

x. Bob Bryar does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

x. Mikey Way can speak braille.

x. Frank Iero jacks off to Monster Trucks.

x. Jeeves asks Ray Toro.

x. Geico saved 15% a year by switching to Gerard Way.

x. Ray Toro went back in time and stopped the JFK assination by catching the bullet in mid air. JFK's head just exploded in sheer amazement.

x. Gerard Way has to sort his laundry in to three loads: darks, whites, and bloodstains.

x. The most effective form of suicide known to man is to type "Frank Iero" into Google and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky!"

x. Jesus walked on water. Gerard Way walked on Jesus.

x. When Frank Iero gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

x. Gerard Way doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says "Now."

x. Mikey Way is like a Tsunami, if you can see him coming it's already too late.

x. Bob Bryar ate The State Puff Marshmallow Man.

x. Ray Toro didn't vote for Pedro. He deported him.

x. When god said, "Let there be light", Gerard Way said, "Say please."

*Frank Iero ordered a Big Mac from Burger King...And Got one.

*Guns don't kill people, Mikey Way kills people.

*Gerard Way doesn't sleep, he waits.

*There is no chin under Bob Bryar's beard, only a third fist.

*When the boogeyman goes to sleep he checks his closet for Ray Toro

*There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Frank Iero has allowed to live.

*Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Mikey Way.

*When Gerard Way does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

*Bob Bryar is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

*Ray Toro’s hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

*Frank Iero doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

*Mikey Way gave Mona Lisa that smile.

*Gerard Way does not get frostbite. Gerard Way bites frost.

*Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Bobtatorship.

*Ray Toro once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

*When Frank Iero falls in water, Frank Iero doesn't get wet. Water gets Frank Iero.

*Mikey Way's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

*When Gerard Way has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

*Bob Bryar doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

*Ray Toro CAN believe it's not butter.

*A picture is worth a thousand words. A Frank Iero is worth 1 billion words.

*Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Mikey Way calls this "a slow Tuesday."