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I'm sick of it. I'm sick of being bitched at, of not taking myself seriously, of letting so many things slide. I've changed once more and again I don't like who I've become. It's time to quit trying to do whatever it is I think I'm doing. It's time to go back to when I dressed comfortably, actually enjoyed going to school, and knew the world could be mine if I chose it to be. I miss Tatsu and Young Syra. I miss the party time-me, the fun-me, the outgoing-me.
Yeah, I had my issues, but I never let them rule me as I do now. Instead I used my learned experience from them to help others. I was happier then, even if I wasn't content. Actually, I'm not sure if I'll ever be content. I'm always changing, revising, re-creating...it's a never ending cycle with me. But it's really annoying when change sneaks up on me. ><
Everyone will be happier, especially me. I am who I am, and I've got to stop hiding it and ignoring it. Now I know that alot of this pain and heartache I feel is because of this betrayal to myself. Which brings me back to my masochism. It's stopping today. No more hurting myself in any way. I hope you're all ready for this and can handle it. ^_^
Come Forth, Me!
 Selenael · Wed Nov 30, 2005 @ 09:55pm · 0 Comments |
