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I am not myself. Not to the public. They do not know me at all. Its all a lie. I am lying to them. I do not act like I used to act, I do not like what I use to like. I am a different me. Its not that I have changed, I know that the old me is here. I see her in the things I do alone. But I have put a mask on my outside persona. I keep my true feeling inside of me and voice only ones I deem necessary to say. I do not want you to know me. I have opened up to people before. I got hurt by them. So I am now closed to you all. I will not let you read my book. I will not let you see my weaknesses. I will not go talk to you outside of school. I do not care to socialize with you outside of the bubble of school. You are only my friend for the purpose of me not looking like a god damn loner all the time. I do not want to see you out of those 6 hours, 5 days a week, 9 months a year. Stop trying to figure out my past, stop trying to get me to go to the park with you. I will only go if I see a way for me to benefit. Just hanging out wont, getting something to eat payed by you will. Just leave me alone. I am only am concerned with surviving the rest of my school years. 3 Years. Then I am done with you. Then I will never talk to you again, or at least not until a reunion. You will have me on your msn, and you will never say hi, you will keep me until you forget who that was. You will delete me.

Just let me sleep.