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What if I don't want a header?! D: <
Hello, Judges. :3
And welcome to a simple journal entry for Task 18 in The Apple Basket.
I'm using a mule's journal rather than my own because it'd just be a whole lot easier.
Please don't mind the pink, it's like a theme for this mule. I'll leave the stories in black so they're easier on your eyes.

A simple note though, I will not be telling the names of the author for judgment purposes.
Names will be released when all scores are in. (It helps rule out some personal feelings toward a person.)
Rather than saying names, when you send me a PM on Zantarni (Hino Daruma), please provide the entry number.
An example of a PM you could send is below.
I'd ask you to give me a score from 1 to 10. 1 being the worst, 10 being the best.


Example
Hey, Hino! Here are my ratings.
Entry 1:
5 / 10

Entry 2:
3 / 10

Entry 3:
10 / 10


Entries are listed below in the comments.
Again, I'd like for you to PM me your ratings, not comment here.

Requirements for entries:
- You do not have to have the best writing ability in the world. You just have to try.
- It has to be a short story. (I don't want to read a novel. o.O)
- Has to be appropriate.
- It can be about an RP character of yours if you'd like.
- DO NOT copy another story from someone else, or their characters! ((I reserve the right to disqualify you from SEVERAL tasks if you do so.))
- We are looking for several judges. Judges can not win the orb because they can not judge and write the stories. (It'd make it unfair.) ((Judging system still being worked out. .-. )
- If you have previous work, share some with us so we know your skill level.
- If you finish early, you may PM me a link to your story. You can put it in the other forums if you'd like, or on another site so your competition is less likely to see it. (If you're paranoid that they'll take your ideas or something)
- All entries MUST be in by or before 5:00pm on Friday. (I may wait another hour or two)
- Please post here saying you're going to take part. And have fun with it! :3






User Comments: [4] [add]
Pink Toe Socks
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Apr 18, 2008 @ 11:16pm
Entry 1

The Dragon’s Folly

The Tiger pounced on the helpless doe and devoured her slowly. As the doe breathed her last breath she said, “Please, please care for my young.” Her eyes misted over and the Tiger finished eating her.

The Tiger was angry that the doe had said that, because according to the jungle law he had to care for the young.

He looked around and quickly found the young gazelles, they weren’t hard to find. They were white all over with very green eyes. Strange, he thought.

They were both male, “Boys come here.”
They looked at the Tiger, then at each other, but they walked over reluctantly.

From atop a high peak a Dragon had seen what had happened. This will be very amusing he thought, with a tricksters smile on his face.

As the weeks passed, the Tiger found it easier to care for the young, but it still annoyed him that he could only hunt at night. He had taught them what areas to stay away from, secret hiding places and that they should never leave their resting place without his knowledge.

Every day the Dragon watched and every day it was harder to stay on the peak.

After three months of living with the Tiger, the Gazelles had become stronger and wiser.
As they walked through the jungle they felt that they were being watched. They stood still and listened, they didn’t here anything.

The Dragon came out of the trees and startled the Gazelles as they tried to run away. He said, “Why do you listen to the Tiger? He killed your mother.” He watched with fascination as the Gazelles only stared at him. “If you bring the Tiger to me I’ll bring your mother back.” He grinned.

The Gazelles were not sure what to do. They knew that the dead could not be brought back and they knew that in the jungle it was common for the strong to eat the weak. They stared at the Dragon and looked away. One of them said, “Go away Dragon and leave as be.” The other said, “The dead cannot be brought back, we are not fooling young anymore, as for us listening to the Tiger…He has cared for us very well, and if it were not for him, we would have not lasted a day in the jungle.” They turned and walked away.

The Dragon became angry and flew away. He found the Tiger and landed in front of him. “Why do you take care of those Gazelles?” He really didn’t understand why.

The Tiger said, “Their mother asked me to care for them when she died, and I must follow the jungle’s laws.”

“Give me the Gazelles and you’ll be free of them” he said with sad eyes.

“I will not! They are my pupils and I have grown to love them.” The Tiger sighed and looked at the Dragon with tired eyes. “Go away Dragon.”

The Dragon became sad and left.

The Tiger and Gazelles did not see the Dragon for many months.

As the Dragon stayed on the peak, he watched the odd family and he became even sadder. Suddenly he got an idea.

The Tiger was at the watering hole taking a drink and suddenly he was hit from above. He screamed in pain and looked into the air horrified as the Dragon’s claws picked him up and took to the air. The Dragon let go of the Tiger and watched as the Tiger died. He thought, now the Gazelles will come with me.

The Gazelles were going to the watering hole to meet the Tiger when they heard a horrible scream. They ran to the watering hole and found the Tiger lying motionless on the ground, there was blood underneath his back and head. The Gazelles came closer and saw that the Tiger was still breathing.

“It was the Dragon.” He said with pain in his voice, “Please help me up and take me home.”

The Gazelles were crying, buy they did as they were told. When they arrived the Tiger told them that they should not leave or try to find the Dragon.

They looked at each other with sad eyes and agreed that they would not go after the Dragon, even though he deserved to die.

When the Tiger heard them say that, he became very sad and angry and he said, “You will not take revenge against anyone, do you understand?” “I have not taught you to these things.”

The gazelles looked down and reluctantly agreed that they would do nothing.

The Dragon was angry that the Tiger had not died and saddened that the Gazelles new that it was him who had hurt the Tiger. From the grief of knowing that the Gazelles would never come, the Dragon never left the peak again.


commentCommented on: Fri Apr 18, 2008 @ 11:19pm
Entry 2

(Not finished, No title)



*The grave was very deep and the torches made the shadows dance wildly*

Ricardo began to tremble so hard that he did not notice the nine hooded figures closing in on him.

He cleared his eyes and looked around. There were people surrounding him.

Ricardo had accidentally found a grave full of fresh body parts and decapitated animals surrounded it. He couldn’t believe that someone would do something so horrible to another human being.

He looked once more at the hooded figures, “Did you do this?” He pointed his flash light at the grave as he spoke to them, they just stood there silently.

One of the figures stepped away from the circle and approached Ricardo. Ricardo scuttled away from the grave and tried to escape from them but as soon as he found an exit, they pushed him away.

“Let me out now!” He shouted, as the figures grabbed him and pushed him into the grave.

“No! You can’t do this to me”, trying to climb out desperately, “Please, please just let me go”, he cried out.

The figures took liquor from their robes out and sprayed Ricardo with it as he screamed and tried to get out.

Ricardo watched, horrified as the figures threw the torches into the grave one by one. He screamed as the flames came for him and tried to climb out again, only to be kicked back in. The flames reached him.

The figures watched him scream and try to stop the flames from consuming him. After thirty minutes Ricardo stopped screaming and moving. The figures watched until the fire died out and then filled the grave back.

As the sun was coming out the figures made a circle around the grave and turned to stone.



Pink Toe Socks
Community Member
Pink Toe Socks
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Apr 18, 2008 @ 11:21pm
Entry 3

(No title)

March 24th, 1830

I am finally home with mother and father, and very grateful that they finally let me out of the asylum. I have convinced them that I no longer hear voices or see visions. It helped that I no longer talked to myself when the nurses were around. Those ignorant fools tied me up every night, afraid that I would get up in the middle of the night and harm them. Ha, if only they knew that I am more than capable to untie myself and do more than harm them. They thought I was crazy, until one by one the doctors and nurses started to see things and hear things, when no one was around. You know what they called me at the hospital? They called me Cain’s Daughter, ha ha the fools, actually its very funny. I rather like it, I did not tell them though, I just smiled and looked away when they called me that.

It is very late and I am tired.

March 30th, 1830

I am sorry that I have not written in a while, but father and mother have not left me alone since I came home. They ask me if it is true that I have stopped hearing and seeing things, every time they have a chance. I tell them yes, but the truth is that the voices and visions have become stronger and it is getting harder to control them.

April 3rd, 1830

When I wake in the morning, there is dirt on my hands and night gown. I do not know how it gets there. Also my visions have become stronger. For the past four days, I have had the same dream:

I am walking alone inside a cave with beautiful glowing crystals. As I walk deeper into the cave the crystals glow brighter and make a soothing humming noise.
I walk deeper and I find a very handsome boy atop an alter.
*just thinking of him makes me blush*
*He has beautiful glowing brown skin, that radiates a white light, his lips are a pinkish brown and his eyes….well I can never remember his eyes or what he is wearing.*
He turns and looks at me and he smiles…he offers me his hand and he helps me onto the altar. He is speaking to me in a worried tone, but I cannot understand him…he holds me in his arms and kisses my eyelids, then he looks at me, but he is crying…now I am being pulled out of the cave and I am crying because I do not want to leave him.

That is when I wake up and I hear someone calling my name from outside.

April 5th, 1830

I am very excited. My father is taking me to an island where there are glowing crystals just like in my dream. Maybe my dream is real.

April 6th, 1830

I had the same dream, but there were more people I did not know, and the boy was really scared and he would not let anyone near me. The people were carrying crosses and spraying us with holly water. I hope that these are not things to come.

April 7th, 1830

We have arrived at Beam Island, It’s beauty is breathtaking, there are many colorful flowers and plants that I have never seen and the people look similar to the boy in my dream. They seem very friendly and they seem to know my father very well. Also they ask me if I remember them, I tell them that I do not. I tell them that I have never been on this island and they look at me like I am crazy.

April 8th, 1830

I saw the boy from my dream today, and his eyes are amber, the villagers stay away from him, they say that he is a witch. They are very superstitious. When he saw me he was very surprised, that his eyes misted over, he ran to me and held me in his warm arms. Afterwards he apologized, my face was very red. When he saw the villagers he looked worried and quickly left for the beach.

April 9th, 1830

I asked my father why the people kept asking me if I remembered them, He told me that when I was nine, I had been here, and that I had been playing with a young boy that lead me to a cave with glowing crystals. For a week we played in the cave, and everyday I told him that we had been playing with other children. He said that one day he came to the cave with us to watch us play. He became very scared when he saw that we were playing with floating crystals and that they were humming. He told us to stop playing or that we would be in trouble with the villagers. When we were leaving the cave, there was a tremor and I was buried under many rocks and that I had died and that the boy had brought me back to like with one of the crystals. The next day my father brought me home and he found out that I did not remember anything.

April 10th, 1830

I spoke with the boy today, his name is Imael, he has no last name.

April 11th, 1830

I have decided to go to the cave, I will leave everyone is asleep.

April 12th, 1830


Imael and I are leaving for the cave tonight.

*To be Continued*


commentCommented on: Sun Apr 20, 2008 @ 04:02am
Scores
Entry 1:
Author: Camila de Lioncourt
Overall Score: 5.75 / 10

Entry 2:
Author: Dark Zodiac Ninja
Overall Score: 6.75 / 10

Entry 3:
Author: Olympia of the Mist
Overall Score: 7.00 / 10



Hino Daruma
Community Member
User Comments: [4] [add]
 
 
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