I'm pissed off right now. My mother's promised to take me to Hot Topic about eight times. Each time, she's broken that promise. She always claims she's either tired or just doesn't want to leave the house. If she's tired, I can understand it. She's been under a lot of stress lately. But still, it's no reason to break a promise. She always gets onto me, stressing the fact that I should keep my promises. And, I do. The only time I've ever broken a promise is when I was in a gang. But, at that time, I wasn't thinking that what I was doing was the wrong thing. I was thinking that it was a way to become a part of a family - even if it weren't a blood family. I was terribly wrong in thinking that. I know that know. And, I've turned my life around. Granted, the past still haunts me. But, the past is something that haunts everyone. It's something that we should get over. But, yet, we can't. We went to my counsolers' office today for one of my appointments. Mrs. Sainker pissed my mother off. She defended me when my mother was complaining about what I wear, and about the fact that I'm Goth. Honestly, I agree with what Mrs. Sainker said. Because I know for a fact that I am being myself. I'm not copying anyone. I'm not making myself out to be someone I'm not. I can't bring myself to do any of that anyhow. It simply isn't me. Afterwards, I asked my mother - very politely, may I add - if we could still go to Hot Topic. She snapped at me. Now, I'm not someone who shows tears in front of people. It's only happened twice. But, still, I came very close to crying there. Now, for those of you who know me well enough, you can probably imagine how much I wanted a punching bag at that moment...Thankfully, I've got one here at home.
They want me to keep from getting depressed..How can I if they always break their promises and keep me in the dark all the time? It's impossible. Even for someone who's been as emotionally hurt as I have.
Eternal_Hell3073 · Fri Aug 05, 2005 @ 01:15am · 2 Comments |