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As I stood in my dark parlor naked looking at myself in the mirror contemplating suicide, a little mouse crept anlong the brownish blood covered floor of my parlor. I picked up the small critter by its tail, dangling it in front of my face. "You love him...dont you? You want him to save all the little children and kiss your gammy on the cheek, right?" As I questioned the rodent, a knock on the door grabbed my attention . I threw the mouse in a pot of boiling water that i always have on hand and made my way up to the main doors. I looked through the peep hole to lay eyes upon the unsuspected visitor. It was a young toad, maybe the age of 20. Who could this be? A fan? A reporter? I answered the door to greet the young man. "Mario!? Wheres Mario!? I must have his autograph! "This...ingrade yelled franticly. " Why would you want that foul representation of a man's autographe when you could have mine?" I said to him pleasantly. "Who are you?" he said in a tone so snarky that every moral shred of thought shrivled up inside me. My head jerked and a crooked grin sprouted upon my face. "He is in the basement youngman." I purseuded him. I lead him to the basement in wich my parlor was held secretly. He followed hastely yet looking around with awe at the palace in which his beloved hero mario resided in. "Mario is in his room behind this old book case, he hides out here to....strategize for bowsers plans, please...follow me." He did follow me into the parlor, the fool, the stupid sheep he is, just for a chance to meet...mario. "Stand right here please, ill go get mario so you can take a picture with him." I assured him as i went to my closet to put on my red shirt and one of marios old caps. I also grabbed my butterfly knife which I appropriately named "The Smile Maker". I walked out to meet the fan as his hero. "It is-a-me a mario!!!" I mimiced in my most broken english. I set up the camera to capture my work. "Ill -uh- stand -uh- behind you to make -uh- a bunny ears haha." I stood behind him unleashing the knife from my pockett, i held it to his neck."smile!" I said in my sqeakiest mario voice as i pressed the knife in to his throat and in a jagged cresent i carved his throat. "Im Luigi!!" I yelled as the young toad relinqueshed his last breath. I stuffed the corpes under the floor boards and sprinkled a dash of paprika on it. I then stripped down to put on a sundress I stole from my "girlfriend" Daisy and i slathered a half a stick of lipstick on my face. I begggan to sob gently like I always do after....my events.
Luigi
 LuckyLuigi · Thu Nov 15, 2007 @ 11:28pm · 5 Comments |
