Why am I so uncreative at the moment? I feel like I'm drained and without any life, but it's not because I've just written a book. I haven't just completed a thesis on cellular macrobiology. I haven't just finished redesigning the health care system in Guyana. I haven't done ANYTHING and I feel tried... worn out... completely without creative juices.
Is it because I'm NOT doing it that I am uncreative? The heart is a muscle we must use to keep it working. We love all the time so we are able to love when the time comes that we need to. Has my hiatus from creativity brought with it permanent disability? Am I going to become like all those people out there (non-Gaians) who aren't creative, and who think Idol, or Funniest Home Videos are the pinnacle of entertainment and wit?
Maybe the fact that I even realise this means I won't become like that, but then, maybe that is the greatest tragedy, that I can see what I once was, and that I can no longer reach up to the places I wanted to surpass, let alone beyond them.
If I can't be creative I don't know if my life is worth continuing, although there are some things I have in my life right now that mean I shall never leave it willingly, not while she remains.
I will write, I suppose, squeezing every last drop of creative juice from the dry, hard sponge that my soul had become, hoping to find, perhaps, a reservoir, as yet untapped, that may quench my thirst for creativity once again.
Thanks for reading.
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A Rant, all the way from RaikoLand...
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RaikoLives
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User Comments: [4] [add]
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karatechamp Community Member 
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RaikoLives
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karatechamp Community Member
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User Comments: [4] [add]
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I know exactly what you're talking about, though. I get that sometimes. Then, out of the blue, I find myself absently doodling on a notebook, then sketching a little character with a funny face, then I create an entire comic strip! It definitely comes and goes, and there's no way of knowing when it'll come back once it's left. It just springs on you one day, and you find yourself wondering why you didn't think of that before.
It's quite annoying, yes? But don't worry. I PROMISE, it'll come back 3nodding . It's definitely NOT one of those "use it or lose it" things. In fact, when you go a long time without being creative, when you finally bounce back you'll see you've, somehow, gotten better. It seems abnormal and erratic, but creativity ISN'T normal. You don't see a dog sitting around thinking of new ways to decorate the kitchen. You don't see a frog writing poems on a sunny day.
There I go again, changing the subject, razz . Do my ramblings always come down to how humans aren't normal creatures but are, in fact, an insane speicies? I apologize, this isn't about my opinions.
However, I DO think there is one opinion that matters most and is above all the best opinion there is and every will be. I love you, and you are a fantastic, creative person and I wouldn't want you any other way, ^_^. Pleasant somethings, love. *smooches joo*