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 Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 2:46 pm
If someone asks, 'Why are you mad at God?', the best answer is:
"Because he's supposed to be all good but he doesn't even have the common decency to exist."
Here's a few more:
People who follow Jesus are good, so you should follow Jesus.
"Chemotherapy can cure cancer, so everyone should have chemotherapy."
You say you don't believe that God exists, but the word "God" is meaningless if there is no such thing, so you are admitting that God exists even as you deny his existence.
"That reminds me, I don't believe you owe me $100."
There are so many wonderful things in the world, how can you say there is no God?
"It's really pretty easy: 'There is no god.' See?"
These are HILARIOUS. Some are probably not the nicest things to say should the question be asked of you, but they're SO FUNNY. I found 'em here:
http://www.iamanatheist.com/arguments.html
When you're done reading, click on the banner at the top of the screen. After it brings you to a new page, click on the link that says 'Atheists Rights and Responsibilities'.
IT'S FUNNY. 3nodding whee
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Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 7:24 pm
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Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 8:05 pm
I'd like to think I'm witty enough to come up with my own sarcastic retorts.
My favorite being Lewis Black's 'fossil' bit, but that doesn't prove I'm witty. sad
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Posted: Fri Jun 29, 2007 9:13 pm
Bahahaha... Thats silly. I loved that.
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 12:00 am
Those are pretty good but I kinda feel like some better responses can be made... to the Batcave!
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 2:24 pm
Good ammo.
Of course, you can always slap them with this sucka.
You're just an atheist because you don't want to believe in a higher being than yourself.
"Come to think of it, neither does God."
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 4:22 pm
That would actually be 'ma'am'. 3nodding
Thanks guys! I thought it was silly too. xD
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 6:23 pm
I know, I saw it in your sig.
Just being "old chap" and "pip pip."
n_n
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 6:38 pm
Theophrastus I know, I saw it in your sig. Just being "old chap" and "pip pip." n_n Yay! mrgreen
I've tried to be mysterious about my true gender, but I finally just decided to include it in meh siggy to make things easier.
But this is my side account, anyway. I don't think most of my friends even know about it. Therefore I can be all 'rawr' and inconspicuous. So my true gender is now known? Meaningless. For my identity shall forever remain buried beneath secret... and a rather large shovel-full of dirt. -dramatic pose-
xD
Need I mention that I'm having much too much fun with this?
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 7:24 pm
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 7:42 pm
OH NO! How did you find that picture of me?! That was never supposed to be posted on the internet!
xD
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 8:07 pm
I came up with a few.
Theist: The miracle of birth alone is proof of God's existence.
Atheist: You've obviously never seen a birth, then.
T: There are examples of God's love for humanity throughout history.
A: Such as the Inquisition?
T: Evolution is just a theory.
A: So is relativity. Are you calling Einstein stupid?
T: The Bible is the best-selling book of all time.
A: It's also been around 2,000 years longer than any competitor.
T: Mary had a virgin birth.
A: And a gullible husband.
T: If God doesn't exist, why is Christianity the most dominant religion in the world?
A: For the same reason the Pet Rock was such a huge hit.
T: Jesus died on the cross for your sins!
A: Send him a thank-you card for me.
T: If you don't accept Christ, you'll go to Hell.
A: If you don't leave me alone, I'll break your arm. How's THAT for an ultimatum?
T: Christ is the answer.
A: What was the question?
T: God's presence is self-evident, through the very fact that everything in the universe exists.
A: Then why are you explaining that to me?
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 8:22 pm
xDDDD
Those made me laugh.
Just as good as--if not better than--the ones on the site.
'The miracle of birth' really isn't all too pretty.
Yay for thank-you cards! rofl
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 8:39 pm
When Jesus was born, did he look like a slimy, green raisin with white goop dripping out of his holes like every other baby? Or was it also an immaculate delivery?
Who is the wetnurse of God? Who is the Christian Midwife? Why aren't they sainted?
Why does Joseph get NO credit for having to compete with God in the bedroom?
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Posted: Sat Jun 30, 2007 8:44 pm
That last one was hilarious. Poor Joseph. rofl
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