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Am I still a virgin?
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Angel_Nyx

PostPosted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 10:32 pm
I feel like the dirtiest slut right now. I may have just had sex with my ex-boyfriend. And I've sworn to be a virgin until I get married.

My boyfriend of two years and I broke up a few weeks ago, agreeing to just be friends. But everytime I'm with him alone he starts getting, well, seductive. Far more so than when we were dating. In fact we've gone much farther physically since we broke up than we ever had before when we were dating. I guess I'm just easy, or maybe incredibly lusty, I don't know.

But regardless, the bottom line is that I was on top of him, we were naked, and he claims he got inside me by an inch before he realized he was about to ejaculate and he pulled out. We both feel like trash, me beacause I even let this happen, him because he still wanted to go further and he hates himself for it. Thankfully, he's leaving for army boot camp in a few weeks, and I hopefully won't have to worry about this ever again.

Can this truly be considered sex? Am I still anywhere near being a virgin?How did I go from a perfect little on-fire Christian girl to a slut like this? What good Christian guy is ever going to want to marry me after I tell them this? Will God really forgive me for this?

Please you guys, give me your honest oppinions about everything I've just said, not what I want to hear. Any advice and prayers are welcome.  
PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 12:40 am
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.  

SinfulGuillotine

Perfect Trash


Angel_Nyx

PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 7:49 am
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.

Thank you so much, you have no idea how good it is to hear somebody say that. I'm just glad that I can come here and talk to people about this. Thank you.  
PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 8:07 am
I think you're not a virgin, but it doesn't matter as long as you and God forgive you ^_^
Well it does, but not a whole lot, you know? XD  

Shadowfire7157


Angel_Nyx

PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 10:26 am
Shadowfire7157
I think you're not a virgin, but it doesn't matter as long as you and God forgive you ^_^
Well it does, but not a whole lot, you know? XD

Thank you for your honest input, I appreciate it.  
PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 1:09 pm
Ask for forgivness..
Thats all I can say.  

dirtdevilgrunt13


Spazzed_out_Basil

PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 7:49 pm
Don't let sin get you down, it's just the Devil trying to suck you in even further. The best thing to do is to put your trust in the Lord and put your problems in his hands. Some of the problems we humans have can only be solved by God, after all he made us, so HE knows how we work. After something like that I understand you felt dirty, the only thing to do is to forget the past and move on with your life. Look at some of the famous people in the bible, like the lady in Luke 7: 36-50

Quote:
And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee's house, and sat down to meat. And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster box of ointment, and stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment. Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner. And Jesus answering said unto him, Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on.
There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owed five hundred pence, and the other fifty. And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most? Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. And he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged. And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head. Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet. My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment. Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little. And he said unto her, Thy sins are forgiven. And they that sat at meat with him began to say within themselves, Who is this that forgiveth sins also? And he said to the woman, Thy faith hath saved thee; go in peace.


So be like the woman who loved the Lord so much and was so true in her want to be forgiven that she humbled herself before HIM.

-God Bless!  
PostPosted: Sat Jun 16, 2007 8:42 pm
Spazzed_out_Basil
Don't let sin get you down, it's just the Devil trying to suck you in even further. The best thing to do is to put your trust in the Lord and put your problems in his hands. Some of the problems we humans have can only be solved by God, after all he made us, so HE knows how we work. After something like that I understand you felt dirty, the only thing to do is to forget the past and move on with your life. Look at some of the famous people in the bible, like the lady in Luke 7: 36-50

Quote:
And one of the Pharisees desired him that he would eat with him. And he went into the Pharisee's house, and sat down to meat. And, behold, a woman in the city, which was a sinner, when she knew that Jesus sat at meat in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster box of ointment, and stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet, and anointed them with the ointment. Now when the Pharisee which had bidden him saw it, he spake within himself, saying, This man, if he were a prophet, would have known who and what manner of woman this is that toucheth him: for she is a sinner. And Jesus answering said unto him, Simon, I have somewhat to say unto thee. And he saith, Master, say on.
There was a certain creditor which had two debtors: the one owed five hundred pence, and the other fifty. And when they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both. Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most? Simon answered and said, I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most. And he said unto him, Thou hast rightly judged. And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head. Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet. My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment. Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little. And he said unto her, Thy sins are forgiven. And they that sat at meat with him began to say within themselves, Who is this that forgiveth sins also? And he said to the woman, Thy faith hath saved thee; go in peace.


So be like the woman who loved the Lord so much and was so true in her want to be forgiven that she humbled herself before HIM.

-God Bless!


Thank you. That really says a lot to me. I guess I can see this in na positive light after all. That verse really spoke to me.  

Angel_Nyx


Sarcastic_Angel

PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 8:36 am
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.


I completely agree with the above. God will forgive you. He already has. He loves you for you, and whatever you do, he will still love you. And the same should go for your future husband. It shouldn't matter if you made a split second mistake. If you marry him, he should love you for you.

And stop worrying about it. You are forgiven. even if you aren't a virgin anymore, it doesn't matter. God loves you, and I know we all love you. And just so you know, I forgive you too. sometimes it helps to know a person on this world has forgiven you too.  
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:26 pm
Sarcastic_Angel
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.


I completely agree with the above. God will forgive you. He already has. He loves you for you, and whatever you do, he will still love you. And the same should go for your future husband. It shouldn't matter if you made a split second mistake. If you marry him, he should love you for you.

And stop worrying about it. You are forgiven. even if you aren't a virgin anymore, it doesn't matter. God loves you, and I know we all love you. And just so you know, I forgive you too. sometimes it helps to know a person on this world has forgiven you too.


Thank you, it's good to hear that I'm not some kind of slut. You guys have all been so kind. I'm so glad I could talk to you guys, I suppose it's easier to talk to someone you don't really know than to talk to your closest friends sometimes.  

Angel_Nyx


vampy dave

PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:30 pm
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.


Couldn't have said it any better. I know how you feel. A year ago, my ex raped me and continued to sexually abuse me for about a month after until I completely broke it off with him. I was in your position, except I knew I wasn't a virgin any longer. It's taken a long time to forgive myself (it still haunts me) but I know God forgave me. Just sit down, think it over, and pray. It'll do you a lot of good. Don't worry about whether or not you're a virgin. Honestly, as long as you're not having sex left and right, it doesn't really matter. And again, you're not having sex left and right, therefore, you are not a slut. Quit calling yourself that (took me a while to do that too). *hugs* We all make mistakes hun, but mistakes can be forgiven.

If you ever need to talk, rant, spill, whatever, just PM me. smile I'll be glad to help.  
PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 9:44 pm
mistressofthelost
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.


Couldn't have said it any better. I know how you feel. A year ago, my ex raped me and continued to sexually abuse me for about a month after until I completely broke it off with him. I was in your position, except I knew I wasn't a virgin any longer. It's taken a long time to forgive myself (it still haunts me) but I know God forgave me. Just sit down, think it over, and pray. It'll do you a lot of good. Don't worry about whether or not you're a virgin. Honestly, as long as you're not having sex left and right, it doesn't really matter. And again, you're not having sex left and right, therefore, you are not a slut. Quit calling yourself that (took me a while to do that too). *hugs* We all make mistakes hun, but mistakes can be forgiven.

If you ever need to talk, rant, spill, whatever, just PM me. smile I'll be glad to help.


Wow. *hugs* It really helps to know I'm not the only one on this site to have to deal with something like this. I feel kind of petty and whiny after hearing a story like that. Thank you, but be careful, I may take you up on that offer to rant (I'm afraid I tend to do that when I'm in extremely foul moods). After reading all these encouraging messages I have felt immensely better and have re-dedicated my life to Christ. You guys have no idea how much this has helped me, thank you.  

Angel_Nyx


vampy dave

PostPosted: Mon Jun 18, 2007 11:52 pm
Angel_Nyx
mistressofthelost
SinfulGuillotine
I think what's far more important than whether or not it was "real sex" or whether or not you're a "real virgin" anymore is seeking forgiveness, both from God and from yourself.

Of course God will forgive you. Nobody's perfect. We all make mistakes. We all sin. God knows this, He loves us in spite of it, and he'll forgive us. All we need do is ask sincerely.

But forgiving yourself is usually a lot harder. As Christians, we tend to put a lot of emphasis on virginity when it comes to sexual matters. But remember that being a virgin does not define you. It's just a label for someone who hasn't had sex. You can be a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person who made a split-second mistake or got into a bad situation and whoops, you're not a virgin anymore. Does that make you any less of of a fabulous, beautiful, amazing person? Of course not. And God knows this, and He loves you because of it. You need to learn to forgive yourself and love yourself because you're a fabulous, amazing, beautiful person, not because you are or aren't a virgin.

As for finding a husband...if he cares so much about your virginity as to not marry you because of a mistake in your youth, then he's not worth marrying, plain and simple. A worthy man will love you for who you are, not for your unpenetrated v****a.


Couldn't have said it any better. I know how you feel. A year ago, my ex raped me and continued to sexually abuse me for about a month after until I completely broke it off with him. I was in your position, except I knew I wasn't a virgin any longer. It's taken a long time to forgive myself (it still haunts me) but I know God forgave me. Just sit down, think it over, and pray. It'll do you a lot of good. Don't worry about whether or not you're a virgin. Honestly, as long as you're not having sex left and right, it doesn't really matter. And again, you're not having sex left and right, therefore, you are not a slut. Quit calling yourself that (took me a while to do that too). *hugs* We all make mistakes hun, but mistakes can be forgiven.

If you ever need to talk, rant, spill, whatever, just PM me. smile I'll be glad to help.


Wow. *hugs* It really helps to know I'm not the only one on this site to have to deal with something like this. I feel kind of petty and whiny after hearing a story like that. Thank you, but be careful, I may take you up on that offer to rant (I'm afraid I tend to do that when I'm in extremely foul moods). After reading all these encouraging messages I have felt immensely better and have re-dedicated my life to Christ. You guys have no idea how much this has helped me, thank you.


Lol, don't feel petty or whiny. You have every right to express your feelings in whatever way they need to be expressed. And I really don't mind rants. I like being able to lend an ear to people who need it. I'm extremely glad you're feeling better. *big hugs*  
PostPosted: Wed Jun 20, 2007 3:02 pm
God will always forgive you of your sins.

Wheather you lost your viginity to this guy or not does not effect yhow much God loves you.

Just ask for forgivness and ask him to help you through this since it appears to be your weakness.  

sarah_star57


tep

Benevolent Prophet

PostPosted: Fri Jun 22, 2007 9:33 am
As long as you are sincerely sorry and ask for forgiveness, God WILL forgive you and if it helps, I even forgive you. I am not trying to brag, but I have been told many times that I am one of the greatest friends some people have/had. I am always forgiving and I always try my hardest to keep people happy. I am always here for anyone who needs to talk about anything, hence, if you need to talk about any of this, just go ahead and message me, I will listen and try to help you out in any way possible.

No, this does not make you a slut or anything else for that matter except human. Our being human makes us who we are. We make mistakes and sin against God, but as long as we are sincerely sorry and ask for forgiveness, we are given it. Our sins make us human. No one is perfect, for we all make mistakes. Some people find it hard to accept that we make mistakes, but it happens nonetheless.

As for your future husband, he should not care for what you have done in your past, but care who you are. I know I do. I forgive my friends for their mistakes, I even pray for them.

Quote:
Oh, I just want you all to know, and I have been meaning to tell you all this for quite a while, but have been forgeting to do so. Anyway, I don't care if you are Athiest or Agnostic or whatever, but I want you all to know that I pray for each and everyone of you every night that I can. I pray that you all sleep well and that nothing bad happens to any of you while you sleep. I will not stop this no matter how much you want me too. Why? Because I respect that you have your own religion and wishes, so you should respect mine.


I had posted this in one of my latest journal (blog) entries over on Red vs Blue. I got a lot of positive feedback about this. Why? Because it is entirely true. I pray for each and every one of my friends and family, even the people here in Firefall, even you. Why do I do this? Because I know God will protect us from the evil's of this world if we ask for it and some people don't ask for it, therefore ask for it for them.  
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*~Let the Fire Fall ~* A Christian Guild

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