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 Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 3:03 pm
Hallie strolled along lazily, heading back to her friends Reno and Jaylin. She had spent the morning running around the lands and had even caught herself some nice deer for breakfast. Now, with her belly full, she felt she'd join her friends again or maybe take a nap somewhere in the shade. Today was just a relaxing day for her.
And what a day it was. So far she hadn't been bothered by her most recent vision. She hadn't even thought much about it, which was even better than not being bothered by it. Perhaps, she thought now, that vision had been a mistake. Maybe she had just ate something bad that day and so was dreaming up crazy things. She'd never really be a mother, would she? She hoped not, for she felt that she wouldn't be a good mother.
But there was no need to worry about that now. She was enjoying herself, enjoying the warm rays from the sun beating down upon her dirtied coat. There was no room for worries today. No bad feelings, just pure relaxation.
Sighing contentedly, the seeress continued on. And even as she had convinced herself that she needn't worry about her vision, she couldn't help but think about it constantly. She had told Reno about it, but not Jaylin. And Reno had sort of freaked on her, saying she was scared and that she'd make a good mother anyways. He'd also gotten sad over the fact that he had no one to love, which saddened her heart more than anything. Jaylin had Aka, Hallie had (sort of) Darius, and Reno? No one. She'd have to help him.
But despite all of the things Reno had said, she'd realized something: she was afraid. Just of what, she wasn't sure yet, but she'd figure it out sooner or later. There were a few options, but none she wanted to explore further than just mentioning them. Did that mean she was scared of them all?
Shaking her head, the female sighed again, this time in despair. Today wasn't so joyful after all.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 3:14 pm
Finally!
He'd managed to slip away from his family unnoticed. It had been after Tor had fallen off the semi-high rock, tumbling dangerously and landing in a heap. Everyone had rushed in hurriedly, crying their despair. Darius had moved himself to where he could see the family, but they couldn't see him. It allowed him to make sure that Tor was okay before slipping away from it all.
Tor would be fine, he knew it. The kid was clumsy, but very resilient. He always seemed to bounce back without a single scratch. How he did that, his older brother wasn't sure, but it was best not to question things.
And Dar had no problems with that. He wasn't interested in family politics anymore. All he cared was that they were healthy and alive. Beyond that, he didn't care to go further. He spent his days away from the family, brooding or simply thinking, which often times led to him brooding. It felt like his heart had been torn out of his chest and eaten right before his eyes, and yet he was still alive. He felt nothing anymore, and he probably wouldn't ever again.
Unless she came back. He knew it, without even thinking, that everything would return to normal if only she'd come back for him. So every day he waited, thinking and brooding to pass the time. But she hadn't come. Not in the days before and probably not today either. And for once, he didn't feel like waiting.
Rising to his paws, he stretched shortly then padded away. Where he was going, he wasn't sure, but a rumble from his stomach reminded him that he should probably find some breakfast for himself. And that was another thing: he was thinner now. It wasn't that he was skinny or didn't eat much, it was that he was lean. It was all that stress that came from worrying over her. He found it hard to maintain a high weight. Before, he'd always been slightly chubby, either with his most recent meal or with muscle from chasing women around so much. But now... it was all different.
And nothing would snap back until she was with him again.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 3:29 pm
Hallie had to stop for a moment. She had eaten too much, and now her belly was bothering her with all of its aching. She growled to it, though it wouldn't do her much good, and sat down, tail wrapping around her legs. Why were things this way? Why couldn't she have just accepted him and then let things fall into place? She couldn't understand why she'd had to be so stubborn.
Her stomach aching a little more, she willed herself to sink down to the ground, her paws curled neatly beneath her. Ears folded back against her skull in slight pain as she lowered her head to the ground, resting it on one outstretched paw. Her eyes lay open for a moment or two before slowly falling closed.
And it was with that warm sensation in the belly that one always got after eating a nice, full meal that the seeress allowed herself to slip away into sleep.
It was some time later that she came back around, the ache in her belly gone without a trace. Maybe there had been some bad piece within the meat that she had ingested. Whatever it was, though, she was glad to be rid of it now. She smiled slightly, and curled into herself comfortably.
"I love it when you smile," a voice whispered, not close but not very far away either. It startled the female dead still, and she stayed put for a moment, hoping that it was just part of her dreams still lingering within her mind. They had a tendency to do that. Yet as the seconds ticked by, she got the feeling that there was someone else with her. Not daring to open her eyes, she instead opened her mind, reaching out for that other being. And when she found him...
"DARIUS!"
She had leapt to her feet, eyes wide open and fur on end. She didn't look happy to see him. "What the HELL are you doing here?" she growled.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 3:38 pm
And just as he was thinking of giving up on ever seeing her again, there she was, right in front of him. He didn't know how he had become so lucky as to find her, soundly asleep so that she couldn't run away at the first sign of him. He had simply been walking along, not really going in any specific direction. It was too good to be true.
Yet it was. True, that is. She was right there in front of him, in the flesh and as real as the next wolf. Only she was more important to him than the next wolf. He loved her, oh so much. If only he could prove that to her, he thought sourly.
So that was how he had come upon her, and he had come to sit down on his haunches, waiting as he had waited to many days before. Only this time she would come back to him. She'd wake up and she'd be right there with him. Well, maybe not right there. He'd made sure to put a little bit of distance between him and her, both because he feared she'd strike out at him if he was close enough and also because he didn't want to scare her by being so close when she woke up.
He waited like that, content. He'd found her, she was coming back to him. And finally she was waking up. He could tell, because her breathing changed and she was stirring now. And she smiled.
"I love it when you smile," he whispered, although he hadn't intended to say it out loud. Big mistake. In the next few moments he could hear his heart beat in his ear, loud as ever. She was waiting until she could figure out who had spoken before she'd reveal that she really was awake.
"What the HELL are you doing here?"
What a fool he'd been to think that she'd be happy to see him. Had he forgotten how she had blatantly ignored him even after his love for her had become public?
"Hallie... I--" he stammered, before cutting himself short. Before he had a whole line of things to say to her, but now they all crumpled away uselessly. The way she was looking at him, with that angry gleam in her eyes that could melt a wolf with a single glance, it just gave away that she hated him. Really hated him.
So he lowered his head and tucked his tail. He was completely deflated.
"I wanted to see you," he managed to say.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 5:42 pm
Hallie narrowed her eyes. How had she not seen this coming? She was a seer and yet she had been unable to predict this. If only she hadn't been so relaxed, she might have figured out that he was in the area and that he was searching for her. She could have avoided this whole thing and she wouldn't have to break his heart. Again.
"I don't want you here," she said harshly, backing up a step. "You know that. Didn't you learn last time? Darius, go home."
And she could have stopped there. She could have simply turned around and walked away and he wouldn't have followed her. She knew because she had read his mind. And it was because she had read his mind that she couldn't bring herself to leave him again. Because in his mind he was crying.
The female dared a look at the one that loved her and her heart nearly broke itself. His eyes were watering and it would take a fool to miss the sadness in his eyes, the true depression that came from losing his only love. It glued her paws to the spot, and she couldn't help but soften her features and look at him sadly.
"Darius," she spoke again, softly this time. "You know this will never work." Pushing him away, that was the tactic she was using now. She was unable to run from him, so she'd have to make him run from her. But it pained her to do so. She loved him, she knew she did, but for some reason she was afraid to commit herself to him.
"Don't let yourself go through the pain again."
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 5:54 pm
Darius stood stalk still. He didn't move a muscle in his entire body, and it seemed almost that his heart had even stopped. But he was still breathing, slowly. He knew this would happen. He had hoped that she would be happy to see him, that she had changed his mind and had realized that she did in fact love him. But it was still the same. He had hoped, but nothing had changed.
He should have known.
"I know," he said quietly, almost too quietly for her to hear, in response to her saying that she didn't want him here. Of course. She couldn't stand him, he knew that. But still, there was that sliver of hope...
"I don't want to go home, Hallie," he said, his voice breaking on her name. "I can't stand to stick around my family, not while I know things are like this between us." He stopped to gather himself up again. His courage was about to fail him, but he wasn't finished yet. He had to say this to her! "There's so much love between them, but none between us. It makes me sick, looking at them being so lovey dovey with one another."
He looked away, his mind tickling inside his skull. His heart beat faster, the pulse clear in his ears. She was looking at him, staring him down. But what was that look in her eyes? He was afraid to look and find out, afraid of what he'd find there.
When she said that it would never work, he lifted his gaze to her and stared hard. "Why not?" he asked, making her wince. "Why not, Hallie? I'd go through a thousand deaths if it meant I'd get to see you, if it meant I'd get to talk to you. Just once. I love you Hallie, and no amount of pain or crushing is ever going to change that."
The male stopped for a moment, wondering if he should continue.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 7:31 pm
"I know."
Those two words ripped through her heart like a sharp spear. He knew that she didn't want him here, and yet he had still come looking for her. He had still sought her out just to see her. And this was how she treated him? He went through all of this pain to see her, and yet she still ignored him and told him to go back. Such a demon, she was.
But she still couldn't make herself leave. Hallie didn't have the will anymore to pull herself away. She was stuck, and there was no escape for her. She'd have to face this, here and now, or it would never end. It would be one twisting spiral, but this spiral would have no end. It would just be a vortex of torture, continuing forever. She had to deal with this now. Not later, not in a while, now.
"Then go some place else, Darius. Geez, you're fully grown. You can't move away from your family?" She didn't know why she had even asked that. It was obvious to her, to anyone. Darius' family was different. The kids just didn't grow up and move away. They were emotionally attached to their parents and it wasn't so easy moving away. The family members truly loved one another.
His family was full of lovers, not fighters. And he seemed genuinely offended that she had asked him what she had. She looked away, ashamed.
"I don't know why you keep persisting, Darius, even when I push you away every time. It's not normal. You know, any other wolf would have just moved on and found someone else." She paused for a moment to think over this.
"Why me?"
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 7:48 pm
Darius looked down at his paws again. She knew what his family was like and she knew that he couldn't just up and leave them one day. He couldn't do that to them. He especially couldn't do that to his mother. It'd break her heart. Just as Hallie was breaking his now.
"You know I can't, Hallie," he said, his voice hard. "You know how it is with them, how it is with my mother. You know I can't leave her. Besides, that's not who I am. If you made any effort to get to know me, the real me, you'd understand that I don't just abandon. I don't just up and leave one day without a trace. When I plan to leave, you'll know."
And he sat back upon his haunches, looking away as she had done. Only he wasn't ashamed. He was angry. With her and with himself. Angry with himself because he couldn't believe he'd let things go on like this for this long. He was angry with her because she was being so stubborn. Just like a female!
"You don't know why?" he repeated, rising to his paws and raising his voice. "You don't know why I keep coming back? Hallie, I thought you could read into me better than that. You know why I keep coming back. I love you Hallie. Why can't to see that?"
He shook his head. "Because you are everything I've ever wanted. You aren't like other females." When she gave him a look, he gave one right back. "I'm not being cliche, whether it sounds like it or not." And he really did sound cliche. But that wasn't the point. "You are the most amazing wolf I have ever met. You've changed me, you've changed my life."
The male paused to think for a moment. "My father once told me that before he met my mother, he didn't know what life was. He was angry and very bitter, but she turned him around and she made him into a different wolf, a better wolf. You are like my mother. You've completely changed me. You know that when I was younger I chased girls around. But now I realize that that wasn't what I was meant to do. I was meant to love you, protect you."
He shook his head. "But you don't want that, do you?"
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 8:39 pm
It was Hallie's turn to look away again. He knew that she was asking simply for the sake of asking and not because she actually wanted to know. She felt ashamed for committing such an act when it was pointless anyways and he knew it was all bluffing. So why did she continue to do it? She was afraid, still, that was why.
"Of course," she said softly, as if that would make up for everything, if she just recognized that she had known it all along. But it didn't feel good, admitting to that, because she knew that he was scolding her for it. Maybe not out loud, but certainly within his mind.
As he went in to the reasons why he kept coming back, her ears folded farther and farther until finally they were flat against her skull. When he said that he loved her, for the umpteenth time already, she frowned and lowered her head slightly, ashamed again. He was not a seer, yet he was reading straight into her. It upset her and unsettled her, and she didn't know if she quite liked the scrutiny.
"I can see it just fine," she growled. "You've made it clear by saying it over and over. But words are only words and--"
She was about to go further, to start off on a rant against him, but then he went into an explanation of how she was unlike other females and how she had changed his life as his mother had changed his father's for the better. And it was with that whole explanation that she began to have a change of heart. Some other female might have thought that he was simply saying that for the sake of convincing her that he was for real. And, in the beginning, she did think that. But with her seer powers, she was able to look into his mind, to read deeper into his intentions.
And there was no evidence of lying or false words. He was telling the absolute truth, just as he felt it.
For a moment, she was speechless. He had completely humiliated her, talking like that and making her look like the villian. But now she was having a revelation. "In... In the beginning," she began, hesitating slightly. "I didn't think that I wanted a real relationship. I was a bit flirty myself, and I never saw myself settling down. Not with anyone. It just didn't seem like a possibility."
"But," she continued, taking in a breath, "you showed me otherwise. And I only pushed you away because... well, because I was really... scared." She sighed and curled into herself slightly. "I didn't think you were for real, and I didn't want to get crushed. I didn't want to have a broken heart, because I knew I'd never be able to recover from it..."
"I just... I don't know what else to say anymore."
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 8:52 pm
Darius shook his head, ready to simply turn away and leave her as she had left him before. But something kept him standing there in front of her. He didn't know what it was, but he suspected that something was about to happen, something that would change the situation completely, and perhaps change their relationship. So he waited as he had waited so many times before.
"If words are only words, then why are we still standing here? All we are doing is talking, and if you think that words don't mean that much then--"
But he stopped himself from going any further. He was heading down a dangerous road, and he knew that if he continued things wouldn't change for the better, they'd change for the worse. So he cut himself off and simply waited for her, for now she seemed ready to come around or at least to say something other than to tell him to go away. And he was right. So came her confession, that she was scared and that was why she had pushed him away so many times.
"You were... afraid?" he repeated, almost not believing her. He'd never thought of her as someone to be afraid. She always seemed confident and fearless, always in charge and knowing what she was doing whenever she did something. It was that alpha-quality that attracted him to her. But here she was, fragile and small and scared. And he wanted to protect her, more than anything else in the world.
"Hallie," he whispered, taking a hesitant step forward. "I had no idea. You broke my heart simply because you were afraid that it would happen to you if it didn't happen to me.." And suddenly he understood. They both understood. Hallie really did love him, she had only been afraid.
"Come here, love," he spoke softly, closing the distance between them. "You don't have to worry about that anymore. Lay down." So she did, and he lay down next to her, curling around her protectively as he had wanted to do so many times before. But only now did he have the chance, only now was she vulnerable enough to want the comfort. And he was glad to oblige.
"I will never leave you. Hallie, I love you so much. You don't have to worry with me. If anything is bothering you, you can always tell me. I will always be there for you," he whispered, nuzzling her neck fur and taking in her scent. "I love you..."
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Posted: Wed Jun 13, 2007 8:14 pm
Even as Darius realized--truly realized--that she loved him and that she wasn't simply playing mind games with him, she was still hesitant. His intentions were completely true and honorable, but she was still uncertain about it all. Attaching herself to one single wolf for her life, and to a wolf who had been a womanizer, no less, it was just a bit strange. And she was unsure of whether she could commit.
But as he drew closer and closer, soon close enough for his smell to overwhelm her senses, she felt herself melting into his embrace. She sank down to the ground as he told her to lay down, and she sighed in relief as he curled around her protectively. Though she could be a bit of a flirt at times, all she had ever really wanted was to have someone there for her, someone willing to protect her and watch over her.
No matter how confident she appeared on the outside, she was still just another female, wanting to be loved. And now she was.
"I'm so sorry Darius... I shouldn't have handled your feelings so carelessly. I wish I could take it back, I wish I could have told you that I love you so long ago." She was breathing heavily now, feeling terribly guilty about all that she had done to him. But he made a hushing noise and gently caressed the back of his neck with his muzzle. It soothed her, and she sank even further into him.
"I love you too," she whispered, allowing herself to relax within his embrace. "I love you so much. And it means so much to me to know that you will be there when I need you. I want you to know that I'll be there for you no matter what, as well. I will never leave you. Not anymore."
And that was how they had become lovers, true to each other and true to their hearts.
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