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 Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 11:11 am
Well I've got some songs that I have written...I think that they are ok but if you want to critisize it,be my guest!
Here is the first one: (No title Yet)
I'm so scared cause along with this infection I will fear rejection.
She is all I ever wanted, and I'm not the one, the only one.
Through sheets you will teach and I will learn. I
've always wanted you to know.
Don't care even if these sheets did burn.
I'm scared, full of fear, but aware and so, you need to know.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
you can hide between the covers and taste the bitterness you've given to me.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together and say this is how we've wanted to be.
I can't stand, since the birth of this inception we've been deemed a collection.
You don't have to go on girl, cause I can feed your appetite.
Why can't you conceive this? All she's got is all I need.
All that she wants and all that she needs she can't give to me.
All that I've got is all that she needs.
All that she wants and all that she needs.
You can't taste these lips for free.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together cuz I'm sick of being placed right on the shelf.
Just finishing the second one so i will post up in a few minutes after I edit it 3nodding
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Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 12:51 pm
caricature of intimacy Well I've got some songs that I have written...I think that they are ok but if you want to critisize it,be my guest!
Here is the first one: (No title Yet)
I'm so scared cause along with this infection I will fear rejection.
She is all I ever wanted, and I'm not the one, the only one.
Through sheets you will teach and I will learn. I
've always wanted you to know.
Don't care even if these sheets did burn.
I'm scared, full of fear, but aware and so, you need to know.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
you can hide between the covers and taste the bitterness you've given to me.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together and say this is how we've wanted to be.
I can't stand, since the birth of this inception we've been deemed a collection.
You don't have to go on girl, cause I can feed your appetite.
Why can't you conceive this? All she's got is all I need.
All that she wants and all that she needs she can't give to me.
All that I've got is all that she needs.
All that she wants and all that she needs.
You can't taste these lips for free.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together cuz I'm sick of being placed right on the shelf.
Just finishing the second one so i will post up in a few minutes after I edit it 3nodding It's not bad, but I didn't feel much of a rhythm to it. Maybe it needs to be typed in clearer verses for people to understand it more.
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Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 12:55 pm
Here is my first compleet song. i don't care what the rules say. Rip it to shreads if you want. How else will I know what to fix?
Title: It Was Better
Forgive my staring but it’s no surprise,
I got lost in those lovely stars you call eyes.
So many feelings, how can things go wrong,
When you love some one who was there all along.
Speak to my heart my unknowing muse,
There are so many different paths to chose,
I watch you from a distance afraid to say why,
And maybe it is better this way.
You walk with the grace of the wind it’s self,
But do I tell you or leave my thoughts on a shelf.
I see you each night in the back of my mind,
While searching for the answer I hope to find.
Speak to my heart my unknowing muse,
There are so many different paths to chose,
I dream of your face, I think of your grace,
Yet maybe it is better this way.
Now that I have at last found my voice, if I could only take back what’s been said,
For now you leave my in a dark void, and my prison…inside my own head.
In another time it could have been, but now who will ever know?
And all that is left for me to do is to sit, and watch…you…go.
Speak to my heart my unknowing muse,
So many different paths to chose,
You were my whole life, but now you’re my strife,
But maybe it’s better this way.
Yes now that you are gone my unknowing muse,
There are so few less paths now for me to chose,
I still think of your face, and of my disgrace,
But maybe it’s better this way.
Oh how…I wish things could still be…that way.
You heard me pals. Be as cruel as you like.
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Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 10:07 pm
caricature of intimacy Well I've got some songs that I have written...I think that they are ok but if you want to critisize it,be my guest!
Here is the first one: (No title Yet)
I'm so scared cause along with this infection I will fear rejection.
She is all I ever wanted, and I'm not the one, the only one.
Through sheets you will teach and I will learn. I
've always wanted you to know.
Don't care even if these sheets did burn.
I'm scared, full of fear, but aware and so, you need to know.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
you can hide between the covers and taste the bitterness you've given to me.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together and say this is how we've wanted to be.
I can't stand, since the birth of this inception we've been deemed a collection.
You don't have to go on girl, cause I can feed your appetite.
Why can't you conceive this? All she's got is all I need.
All that she wants and all that she needs she can't give to me.
All that I've got is all that she needs.
All that she wants and all that she needs.
You can't taste these lips for free.
I don't wanna be your lover, I just wanna be myself,
why can't we just be together cuz I'm sick of being placed right on the shelf.
Just finishing the second one so i will post up in a few minutes after I edit it 3nodding This is a great start, with brilliant lines. I would seperate it into stanzas, just so the ryhthm is clearer.
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Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 10:11 pm
Chounan of the Storm Here is my first compleet song. i don't care what the rules say. Rip it to shreads if you want. How else will I know what to fix? Title: It Was Better Forgive my staring but it’s no surprise, I got lost in those lovely stars you call eyes. So many feelings, how can things go wrong, When you love some one who was there all along. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, There are so many different paths to chose, I watch you from a distance afraid to say why, And maybe it is better this way. You walk with the grace of the wind it’s self, But do I tell you or leave my thoughts on a shelf. I see you each night in the back of my mind, While searching for the answer I hope to find. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, There are so many different paths to chose, I dream of your face, I think of your grace, Yet maybe it is better this way. Now that I have at last found my voice, if I could only take back what’s been said, For now you leave my in a dark void, and my prison…inside my own head. In another time it could have been, but now who will ever know? And all that is left for me to do is to sit, and watch…you…go. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, So many different paths to chose, You were my whole life, but now you’re my strife, But maybe it’s better this way. Yes now that you are gone my unknowing muse, There are so few less paths now for me to chose, I still think of your face, and of my disgrace, But maybe it’s better this way. Oh how…I wish things could still be…that way. You heard me pals. Be as cruel as you like. Third hit power ballad!! Okay. It's good, but it tends to get choppy in places, especially the 2nd stanza. (and it's choose, not chose, sorry, that drove me nuts throughout) Watch your rythmn, and don't cram too many unneeded syllables, it'll throw off the song.
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Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 5:11 pm
IMMORTALwhen you see the invisable your life is not the same and you wish that you can tame your mind and stop doing tricks the only way u can do any thing is if your a mortal. feeling the future feeling the past and u wish u can't cast the spell 2 kill. feeling alone your parents die your unusual. people freak out and scream when they look into your eyes your very wise as smart as can be drinkin fancy tea. killing people who give u a fee u hate your life pickin up a knife everytime you feel lonely and stab yourself. u think that people like you but...... ur wrong they hate you they state that your freaky. not able to talk 2 someone who doesn't run away every damn day. its the same thing over and over again I hate this PAIN!. you have no idea wat i feel! its scary that you don't know half of the scaredness. its so FREAKY!.......(guitar solo).........the fact is I HATE MY LIIIIIIIIIIIFE!
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Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 10:47 pm
Death Version IMMORTALwhen you see the invisable your life is not the same and you wish that you can tame your mind and stop doing tricks the only way u can do any thing is if your a mortal. feeling the future feeling the past and u wish u can't cast the spell 2 kill. feeling alone your parents die your unusual. people freak out and scream when they look into your eyes your very wise as smart as can be drinkin fancy tea. killing people who give u a fee u hate your life pickin up a knife everytime you feel lonely and stab yourself. u think that people like you but...... ur wrong they hate you they state that your freaky. not able to talk 2 someone who doesn't run away every damn day. its the same thing over and over again I hate this PAIN!. you have no idea wat i feel! its scary that you don't know half of the scaredness. its so FREAKY!.......(guitar solo).........the fact is I HATE MY LIIIIIIIIIIIFE!
Just a suggestion.
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Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 11:01 pm
Well heres another one...I think sweatdrop Kinda emo.
Huh
Check it...uggh
Silence
Something about silence makes me sick
'Cause silence can be violent
Sorta like a slit wrist
If the vibe was suicide
Then you would push da button
But if ya bowin' down
Then let me do the cuttin'
Some speak the sounds
But speak in silent voices
Like radio is silent
Though it fills the air with noises
Its transmissions bring submission
As ya mold to the unreal
And mad boy grips the microphone
Wit' a fistful of steel
Yeah...and mad mad boy grips the microphone
Wit' a fistful of steel
'Cause I know the power of the question
Wit' a fistful of steel
And I won't stop 'cause I know the power of the question
It's time to flow like the fluid in ya veins
If ya will it, I will spill it
And ya out just as quick as ya came
Not a silent one
But a defiant one
Never a normal one
'Cause I'm the b*****d son
With the visions of the move
Vocals not to soothe
But to ignite and put in flight
My sense of militance
Groovin', playin' this game called survival
The status, the elite, the enemy, the rival
The silent sheep slippin', riffin', trippin'
Give ya a glimpse of the reality I'm grippin'
Steppin' into the jam and I'm slammin' like Shaquille
Mad boy grips the microphone
Wit' a fistful of steel
Yeah...and mad boy grips the microphone
Wit' a fistful of steel
'Cause I know the power of the question
Wit' a fistful of steel
And I won't stop 'cause I know the power of the question
Ahh s**t
And I won't stop 'cause I know the power of the question
And if the vibe was suicide
Then you would push da button
But if ya bowin' down
Then let me do the cuttin`
Yeah
Come on
A .44 full of bullets
Face full of pale
Eyes full of empty
A stare full of nails
The roulette ball rolls alone on the wheel
A mind full of fire
And a fistful of steel
And if the vibe was suicide
Then you would push da button
But if ya bowin' down
Then let me do the cuttin'
Yeah wit' a fistful of steel
Come on
Wit' a fistful of steel
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 4:17 pm
ELMO Elmo's got a gun Elmo's got a gun Big bird's on the run Ernie's dialin' 911 What made elmo snap, Was he tired of big birds crap? They said when Elmo was arrested They found Oscar headless in the trash I hear that Gordon's really runnin Now that elmos got a gun, The streets never gonna be the same. Elmo's got a gun Elmo's got a gun Grover's head has come undone Sesame street's not real fun - *GUNSHOT* You want me to walk around sesame street without a bulletproof vest?! Forget about it
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 4:23 pm
LOVE
Love is a magic that can be nice but its a new feelng to everyone u cant stop this kind of magic its killing me i cant stop myself Bleeding in my heart i CANT STOP MYSELF YAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! I wont waist myself on this magic i hate it i will stop and run away i have n choice I CANT STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOp i am crying. in this life i cant Win..........
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 7:07 pm
Chounan of the Storm Here is my first compleet song. i don't care what the rules say. Rip it to shreads if you want. How else will I know what to fix? Title: It Was Better Forgive my staring but it’s no surprise, I got lost in those lovely stars you call eyes. So many feelings, how can things go wrong, When you love some one who was there all along. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, There are so many different paths to chose, I watch you from a distance afraid to say why, And maybe it is better this way. You walk with the grace of the wind it’s self, But do I tell you or leave my thoughts on a shelf. I see you each night in the back of my mind, While searching for the answer I hope to find. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, There are so many different paths to chose, I dream of your face, I think of your grace, Yet maybe it is better this way. Now that I have at last found my voice, if I could only take back what’s been said, For now you leave my in a dark void, and my prison…inside my own head. In another time it could have been, but now who will ever know? And all that is left for me to do is to sit, and watch…you…go. Speak to my heart my unknowing muse, So many different paths to chose, You were my whole life, but now you’re my strife, But maybe it’s better this way. Yes now that you are gone my unknowing muse, There are so few less paths now for me to chose, I still think of your face, and of my disgrace, But maybe it’s better this way. Oh how…I wish things could still be…that way. You heard me pals. Be as cruel as you like.
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Posted: Mon May 28, 2007 5:17 am
my first complete song.
We take sour sips from life's lush lips
And we shake, shake, shake the hips in relationships
Stomp out this disaster town
You'll put your eyes to the sun and say, "I know
you're only blinding to keep back what the clouds are hiding."
And we might've started singing just a little soon
We're throwing stones at a glass moon
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning, whoa-oh
We keep the beat with your blistered feet
And we bullet the words at the mockingbirds singing
Slept through the weekend and dreaming
Of sinking with the melody off the cliffs of eternity
Got postcards from my pharmacist saying: "How've you been?"
We might've said goodbyes just a little soon
(Stomp out this disaster town)
Robbing lips, kissing banks under this moon
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning, ohh…
It was ice cream headaches and sweet avalanche
When the pearls in our shells got up to dance
You call me a bad tipper of the cradle
But I'm just tired yawns for fawns on hunter's lawns
We're the has-beens of husbands
Sharpening the knives of young wives
Take two years and call me when you're better
Take tears of mine, find yourself wetter
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning
Whoa oh, we're so miserable and stunning
Whoa oh, love songs for the genuinely cunning
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Posted: Mon May 28, 2007 5:21 am
Lemme tell ya now
I came to bring the pain
hardcore from the brain
Let's go inside my astral plane
Find out my mental
based on instrumental
Records hey so I can write monumental
Methods I'm not the king but retards is decaf
I stick'em full of cream check it
Just how deep can s**t get get deeper than your fists
And brothers is mad pissed accept it
In your cross colors clothes you crossed over
now ya totally crossed out and kriss kross
Who da boss niggaz get tossed to da side
I'm the dark side of the force of course
It's the method man from the wu-tang clan
I be hectic and comin' for the head piece protect it <******** it two tears in a bucket
Niggaz want the ruckas? so bust it at me son now bust it
Stylez I get buckwild method man on some s**t <******** niggaz foul son I'm sick insane crazy drivin' miss daisy
How the ******** am i? now I got mine I'm swazy
Is it real son lemme know it's real son if its really real son lemme know it's real
Load it up and kill one Load it up and kill one Load it up and kill one if it's really real
When I was a little stereo I used to be the champion
I always wonder when I would be the number one hey hey hey
And now you listen to me darcon darcon
And all you niggaz come to test me test me
I'm gonna lick out your brains
Mothers wanna hang with the meth bring the rope
cause the only way you hang is by the neck
***** pump off a set comin' through all your projects
Take it as a threat or better yet it is a promise
Comin' like a vet on some old vietnam s**t
You can bet your bottom dollar that I'm on it
And it'll get even worse word to god it's the wu
Comin' through takin' niggaz 'fore they're
Gone gone gone gone gone gone
movin' to your left
i came to represent and carve my name within your chest
you can come test realize it's no contest son
i'm the gun who won that old wild west
quick on the draw with my hands on the floor
lovin' all those goddamn monkey rhymes galore
check it 'cause i think not when it's hip hop like propa
rhymes be the proof when i'm drinkin' ninety proof vodka
no O.J no no straw
when you give it to me - yeah - give it to me raw i burn
give it to me raw i burn
chest hairs
i don't need no chemical blow to pull no ho - no
all i need is chemical bank to pay her up
is it real son lemme know it's real son if its really real son
lemme know it's
1 2 3 4
kill one - ******** it up and kill ******** it up and kill one
lemme know it's real
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Posted: Mon May 28, 2007 5:28 am
Why'd you go and break what's already broken
I try to take a breath but I'm already choking
How long till this goes away
I try to remember to forget you
But I break down every time I do
It's left me less than zero
Beat down and bruised
I can't see you with him
Why'd you go and break what's already broken
I try to take a breath but I'm already choking
Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him
How long till this goes away
I can't seem to get my heart over you
Cause you creep into everything I do
And now I'm dying to know
How he touches you
I can't see him with you
Why'd you go and break what's already broken
I try to take a breath but I'm already choking
Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him
How long till this goes away
How long till this goes away
She said she wants to be friends
I took a big step back
She said
She said
She said she's sorry
With one finger
I said ******** that
I can tell you're lying when your lips move
Cause of one lie it's not me it's you
It's left me less than zero
Beat down and bruised
I can't see him with you
Why'd you go and break what's already broken
I try to take a breath but I'm already choking
Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him
How long till this goes away
Why'd you go and break what's already broken
I try to take a breath but I'm already choking
Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him
How long till this goes away
How long till this goes away
She said she wants to be friends
I took a big step back
She said
She said
She said she's sorry
With one finger
With one finger
I say ******** that
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