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 Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 10:30 am
She wriggled her nose and that was the only sign the female was alive. She was lying on her back, forepaws tucked against her chest with the dappled sun on her belly.
She was lying in the clearing of the densite, preparing herself to give a lesson. She had to do well to prove herself to Ola! To prove herself to everyone! She knew she could do it and she knew deep down that this was an important step in her life.
However, until Azmaria arrived there was nothing for the little white female to do but wait. Wait and watch the clouds float by her head. Firstly she would tell Azmaria how well she had done, then she would explain more about The Trinity and the Holy wolves, it was important Az understood that first.
The rest could come later.
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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 10:41 am
Azmaria had enjoyed the new moon ceremony. It had gone well and surprisingly, she had managed not to fumble up her role in the ceremony which was a perk. Overall the wolfess could see herself falling into routine with this pack soon enough and with that routine would come a sense of belonging and home. For now though she had a great deal to learn and by the height of the sun she should be meeting with Lewana.
Slipping out of the forest the bordered the clearning around the den, Azmaria's eyes quickly found the white femme that was to be her tutor. It was odd really, to think of one younger than she teaching her but Lewana was well knowledged in the pack so she would be one of the best to learn from.
Moving across the clearing at a fairly brisk pace with her tail wagging, Azmaria once again pushed the boundaries of her tolerance of pain. Only a wince showed the wolfesses discomfort but she pressed on until she was a mere yard away from Lewana. It was a giant leap, yes, but Azmaria felt most comfortable around the white she-wolf so Lewana was the one whom Azmaria tested her boundaries around the most. Tail wagging to hide her discomfort, Azmaria looked at Lewana expectantly. "I am ready when you Lewana." She cocked her head to the sid eplayfully.
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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 10:47 am
Oh, Azie! Lewana rolled from her back and pulled herself up onto her paws, shaking any dirt that might linger on that pristine pelt. You sure were quiet! I never even heard you coming. It's a good job Ola wasn't around to see that or she'd have nipped at my ears. She lowered them as if the old wolf might still be around. Then she suddenly remembered why Azmaria was here.
Oh! That's right. It's teaching time, I almost forgot! She would have blushed if it had been possible.
I think you're a natural at this, you did so well at the ceremony! Ola was very pleased with how it went. She said that there will be more new faces on the way, who knows! Maybe this pack can be on its way to being great again! Cerridwen will be so happy. She shook her head and sat, curling her tail up and over her forepaws.
Well, anyway, today I'll teach you about The Trinity and the rules for a holy wolf like us. She beamed with pride. I'll try to explain it so that it's not all jibberish, but tell me if you get confused. I'm not so good at explaining things sometimes.
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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 10:54 am
Azmaria chuckled. "Ola expects so much from you but you're still very much a pup yet. Don't worry, you'll eventually start getting what Ola wants and it'll become second nature to you. Having other sneak up on you isn't hard especially if you're enjoying yourself." She winked before lowering her hindquarters to the ground to sit.
"I won't lie. I was very nervous about the ceremony." She said with slightly lowered ears. "But like you said, it did go over well. I am glad Ola approved."
As Lewana continued Azmaria nodded. Her ears were foreward and ready to catch everything that Lewana said. She didn't want to miss one detail. "Well I am all ears and ready to go. I just hope I can learn it all. It seems, from what I saw and heard, that there are quite a few things that I need to learn."
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Posted: Thu May 24, 2007 12:31 pm
She wagged her tail and nodded. I wish I weren't a pup anymore! Then she tipped her head thoughtfully. Actually I'm glad I'm not all grown up yet. Then with a nod the little wolf turned her pink nose up towards Azmaria and cleared her throat.
Okay, I'll talk to you about the Maiden first, since I know most about her. She laughed and then looked a little embarrased. Maiden's are born usually to the Holy Mother, though in truth they can be produced from anyone within the pack, holy wolf or not. They are usually plain in appearance, white or light grey. Their colour is important because it symbolises purity and innocence. However, before Cerridwen chooses the Maiden, the pup is asked whether it is what they desire. I said yes because I wanted to be a part of Cerridwen...but sadly when I was a baby I had know idea what it would be like to...to not have a mate, to not be touched by anyone.
She moved on then, steering away from the subject of mates. To stay pure I cannot be touched by any wolf other than holy wolves. If I am touched by an outsider then I am condemned a sinner and am forced to bathe in Amen until I am declared 'pure' enough. The Maiden is very much alone in that sense, having a den to herself and never being able to share one with another. Then her voice grew quiet and sad. However, the Maiden is also the only wolf of the Trinity who can out-grow her position. When I am deemed too old I will step down and become a Priestess just like you.
Then she turned to more joyous things. But you might think being the Maiden is a bad thing. Sometimes it is, sometimes I am terribly lonely and I lay in my den at night thinking my heart will break. But there is something else inside me, something which brings me incredible joy. She paused and there was a deep and genuine love in her eyes.
Lady Cerridwen.
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 8:19 am
Asking a pup to make a decision such as becoming the maiden when they hadno inkling of what the title entailed was not a fair way of finding one. In truth, Azmaria was sure that any pup who had ever looked upon the maiden with awe would jump at the chance to become one. Sadly, Azmaria knew that was part of the pack traditions that would never change afterall, if a wolfess knew the limits of being a maiden would they all opt to take up the position.
Looking at Lewana glow at the mention of Cerridwen Az had no doubt that the answer to that question was no.
"IS there a certain age in which a maiden outgrows her rank or is it determined by Carridwen?" Lewana tipped her head slightly as she asked.
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Posted: Sun May 27, 2007 8:44 am
Lewana nodded. Yes, a Maiden remains in her rank whilst she is able to produce pups. When I fail to come into heat I am deemed too old. You see, resisting temptation is proof of your loyalty to being pure. But when we are no longer able to have pups there is no temptation anymore. She didn't like the idea of never having pups but she knew it wasn't necessary. With the alphas here to raise new pups there was no need for her to add to the numbers.
The Maiden, as you've probably guessed, represents the new, the young and the innocent. Her time is when the sky is dark with a new moon. That is why I led the ceremony that time. At other times one of the other trinity lead.
She wagged her tail. During the moon ceremonies, Cerridwen leaves the heavens to descend on us. The Trinity are vessels, our souls enhanced to capture the very essence of Cerridwen herself. When we perform the ceremony, she will merge with us as one and speak through us to talk to the pack. She smiled. That was her favourite part. Being one with a Goddess was what made it all worth it.
She could feel the love of Cerridwen floating all around and see it reflected in the eyes of all who looked on.
There was a unity here unlike any other.
It was faith.
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Posted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 5:21 pm
Azmaria nodded. She couldn't imagine not being able to look foreward to the prospect of having amate and eventually a litter of pups. That was one of the few things that she looked foreward to. Mother had always seemed happy having all of her pups around so Azmaria wanted her own sometime. But to have pups, Az needed to find a mate. First things first afterall. One day maybe her mate-to-be will walk into her life. Still...poor Lewana. The small femme couldn't hide the sorrow from her eyes as she spoke of never having pups but Azmaria knew not to push the subject. Instead a little push for a change of subjec tmight help.
"I take it from what I gathered around the pack that each of the trinity leads the ceremony during their respective time of the moon's phases. When does Ola and your mother lead the ceremony and what is the purpose of the priests and priestesses? I know that we sometimes participate in the ceremonies but what is our purpose all around?" Azmaria tilted her head slightly as she questioned the younger female.
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Posted: Mon Jun 04, 2007 12:37 am
She nodded. Glad that Azmaria was asking questions. Sheliked being able to answer them, it mad her feel a lot more intelligent than she actually was. Yes, I'm of the new moon. Of new life and such, as I've said. She smiled. Ola, being the crone, represents the waning moon. She represents everything that I don't...in a way, though our meanings are surely linked. Ola represents death but not in the horrible sense. In fact the death she represents for us is much more hopeful than other wolves deem it. Because her death also represents a new, a moving from one onto another. Itis a new beginning but in a new world. In that way it's only a false death.
Ola represented much hope for the rest of the pack. It was probably why she was also quite a loving, grandmotherly figure to many. She was not harsh and cruel death that many thought it to be. So in our ways we both represent a new beginning.
She nodded then and turned to her mother, Claire. Hers was possibly the most wonderful of all the Trinity wolves, for she was able to take a mate and to love. In fact, it was encouraged.
My mother, Claire represents the full moon. She is fertility and the giver of life. She is wonderful! You'll love her. Then with a small nod she continued. It was clear she was enjoying the teacher role.
Your role in the pack is like this. If we were ill on the night of our moon ceremony and unable to take over, it would be one of the Thana or Thanu who owuld take over in our place. The other holy wolves are possible vessels in time when they are needed so long as they keep to the ways. As such, you will be cared forand protected in the pack. Like us, you will never be sent on duties that could do you harm, you especially Azmaria. Perhaps your role will bedifferent from the others because of your...gift. Perhaps not. That is up to Ola alone. For now, however, you may join in the occasional hunt, though never to give the killing blow. But you will never be put on patrol or sent out to track down sinners. You are far too important for that. However, unlike me, you are able to mate with any male in the pack, so long as the alphas deem it so. It is preferred that holy wolf mates with holy wolf but truly, if there is one warrior who you desireit will not be forbidden. She paused there.
Any questiosn so far?
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Posted: Tue Jun 05, 2007 12:53 pm
Azmaria tried to soak in all the information given to her. There was so much to learn and this was only the tip of the iceberg but she was dead determined to conquer this little challenge, along with another, larger one.
Questions? Oh yes, there were so many she could ask, but which one? Details weren't all that important right now. Instead Azmaria just wanted the basic gist of the pride's religion and standings before diving into the nitty-gritty but Azmaria's mind was beginning to change direction. Being with Lewana seemed to boost a sense of self assurance and determination. Maybe it was because the she-wolf was so faithful to her position in the pack and took things as they were, or maybe it was because of Cerridwen being channeled through the younger she-wolf either way, Azmaria was beginning to feel the need to try and conquer a rather particular demon.
With that state of mind, Azmaria took the initiative to move from her position which was a few feet from Lewana to sit directly next to the she-wolf. With such a close proximity Azmaria's mild headache blossomed into something much more. A mix of pain and...something else. A Type of tickling on her mind. She couldn't quite place it but it was something...something not all that unwanted. Looking to Lewana Azmaria ducked her head slightly. "I am sorry Lewana but...but I just feel like I have to do this now and I...I don't want to let that feeling pass me by. I fear that if I had let it go and not test my boundaries to their limits now that I would never get up the courage to do so later."
A small whimper escaped the femme as she closed her eyes and attempted to fight back the waves of pain that bombarded her. An inner monologue of self-assurance constantly played within her head as she kept the close proximity with Lewana, not daring to move away for fear she would never attempt this again.
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Posted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 12:24 am
Lewana loved teaching. It was good to have a responsibility for a change. Azmaria, too, seemed to be a great listener and she knew then that she would make a wonderful priestess. She had to admit that it took her by surprise when the wolfess came close. She didn't think she'd ever been so close to her friend.
Azie...I... But she stilled her voice. She wondered if this was something to do with her seer powers, the ones Ola had told her of. If it was then she might need to concentrate or something. But as she sat there, looking to her side nd into Azmaria's pain filled face she knew she couldn't just sit and do nothing.
She turned her head and licked the other femme's ears, just once. It's okay Azie. Though she couldn't help but think this might be a bad idea. She didn't want to be held responsible for hurting Azmaria. She didn't think she'd be able to live with herself if that was the case.
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Posted: Sat Jun 09, 2007 6:52 am
Azmaria fought with herself internally trying to ward off the pain that continued to filter into her poor mind. It was such an overwhelming experience and one that Azmaria's instincts wanted her to back down from. Backing down was not an option though and Azmaria knew it. this was her time. This was the time to test herself and try to conquer this horrible handicap of her. She wanted, no needed to get past this if not just for herself then for the whole pack. Azmaria knew that her true worth in the pack would never been found unless she pushed herself past this barrier. Not only she would benefit from this. If these pains could be overcome then everyone would be able to benefit from the powers she possessed and Azmaria would finally get her life back again.
The warring in her mind was very much a stalemate. Nothing got better but didn't proceed to get worse. Eyes shut as tightly as they could be, Azmaria focused on her plight. Why couldn't she overcome it though? Why couldn't she push the pain away and find this power that Ola spoke of? It had to be there, it just had to be, but where? The waves of pain that rolled in like the sea upon the beach were non-stop and were doing quite well of hiding those powers from her. Her inner self tried to reach out and grasp at anything that may help but nothing presented itself to her. What was she to do!?
A sensation from outside her mind, pulled Azmaria away for a split second. The touch of another wolf. That was something she had not experienced in quite some time. It had to be Lewana, who else would it have been. The white she-wolf was the only one around unless Ola happened to...Ola...that's right! Hadn't Ola said something about embrassing the pain not fighting it?
With renewed hope Azmaria dived back into her mind and instead of errecting barriers to push away the pain she broke down the ones already in place and allowed the waves of pain to wash over her. Her body tensed as the pain flooded her mind but Azmaria didn't budge. No, she focused on willingly inviting the pain to encase her as she attempted to accept it and welcome it into her as part of her, part of the powers that she was to have. It wasn't an easy thing to do. Oh no, the aching wa near enough to make Azmaria finally give in and withdraw from herself but an inner concious didn't let her. There was a determination there that Azmaria just couldn't shove away and she proceeded to deal with the aches and pain as she tried various way to allow her body to cope with it.
Finally, a break way appeared. The pain receeded just as she opened herself up to the max. She left nothing in place that would inhibit the pain from flooding her completely. Instincts wanted her to throw up all barriers but the she-wolf fought that instinct tooth and nail as the waves continued to pound against her, but with each wave that rolled across her mind the next one was weaker.
After quite sometime of this Azmaria finally felt the last wave crash through and with it a strange outside sensation of worry bombarded her. Opening her eyes, the femme's taunt body sagged slightly from exhaustion but Azmaria didn't let that stop her. She instantly reached out and nuzzled Lewana, a few tears glistening in her eyes. She knew where that sense of worry was coming from. It was just too simple to deduct. "There's no need to worry Lewana, I am alright." She smiled at the young wolfess as she instinctively errected mental barriers to keep herself from sensing other thing suntil she managed to get her new found powers completely under control. Afterall, the last thing she wanted was to go insane from a bombardment of emotions and thoughts from other wolves.
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Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:20 am
Lewana had been worried. Exceptionally worried. She ahd looked into Azmaria' face and seen pain there. A pain that looked so horrible she feared that her friend might die. Okay it was a little over dramatic, but Lewana could bethe best worrier at times. Her ears were flattened back and her tail was curled up against her belly.
As she watched on the worried whine never left her throat and it soon became apparant that some sort of battle raged behind Azmaria's eyes. A battle Lewana would never understand.
Then suddeny she heard her friend's voice and after what had seemed like an eternity, the pain seemed to be over.
Azzie? Lewana's voice was a whisper. Then there was that smile and Lewana was convinced. Azmaria was better. In fact she looked better than ever.
With an overjoyed yip, the little wolf wagged her tail fiercely as she gathered her paws and arched her back into a playful bow. Oh Azzie, you're okay, you really are! She barked then and began her mad dashing, circling Azmaria as fast as possible.
I thought you wouldn't wake up! She exclaimed.
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Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 6:03 am
Azmaria, tired and much wanting a nap from her endevour could help but laugh at Lewana's antics. The little she-wolf certainly knew how to keep Azmaria laughing despite anything that may got on.
"Yes, I am fine, if not a bit tired. Who would have thought that working inside your own mind could be so draining." A gentle wag of her tail gently brushed the grass behind her as she sat there watching Lewana's puppish antics.
"I...I hope you don't mind that I did that to you. I mean, I was pretty sure nothing serious would happen to me besides a raging headache if things went wrong, but well, I didn't know for sure and I doubt Ola would have been happy if things did go wrong..." She sighed and shook her head. "Anyway, I don't know if I am up for much more teaching today Lew. I doubt I'll be able to retain anything you tell me at this point."
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Posted: Fri Jun 15, 2007 12:00 am
She paused to catch her breath, tongue lolling as she panted. I had faith in you. The little wolf bobbed her head. You did really well. I'm just so glad that things are okay. She tipped her ears forwards and smiled. Uh huh, you just go get some sleep, we can continue when you're better. I'm sure Ola won't mind since you tired yourself out for a good enough reason
Do you need help getting to your den, or will you be okay?
She wasn't exactly sure how she was going to help, not without a lot of bathing afterwards, but if that is what was needed Lewana would do it. Plus she felt a little stressed. A nice bath might do her good.
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