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 Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 9:14 pm
My husband and I were talking the other night about having another baby, we don't really have the finances, but we can't afford the birth control anymore either. He doesn't really want another baby just to have another, but instead to keep Alora from getting spoiled. I kind of like the idea of having another one, it's just hard to see myself sharing time with another baby. I've heard so many say that it's a lot harder, and I've seen how hard it can be. We've already agreed that we are going to wait at least another 6 months before we try to get pregnant. Any advice on how a 2nd child changes things?
I'll be updating every so often.
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Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 3:53 am
As the older of two siblings, I was old enough to see how my mum coped. Though there's five years between me and my brother, he seemed a lot easier than I was as a child. (That changed when he turned five and really found his voice though >.<) A lot of people also say if you had an easy first child, the second one is going to be a nightmare, and vice versa. Maybe in some cases but not in all.
Then there's my sister. She has five children now, her eldest is ten this month and there's only 2 years between her eldest and her second child. She coped pretty well, but, there is only 11 months between her second and third, and she did struggle. We had her second eldest with us for a week or two so she could bond with her newborn and it did help.
I see it as it's all on the parents and the children. Some can cope really well, some don't, whether there's 11 months difference or 11 years (as an exagerated example).
Me and my fiance were considering having a go at trying for another child, but we've decided to wait a little bit. Things haven't been that great between us lately so we're working on that, plus working on his health and past problems. Plus Kyra is a terrible little two year old (well, she's got a month till she's two but she's hit that stage already!) so we don't feel we can cope with another one for a while.
I would suggest, while you're considering another baby, to sort out finances. That's also another reason we're waiting a while to try for another. If you can sort out your current finances to be able to afford a new baby, all well. Otherwise it would be considering boosting finances in one way or another.
Other than that, I wish you all the best and good luck smile
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Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 4:31 pm
I don't know how old Alora is but i thought sharing with you me and my boyfriends plans would help you out in this situation. Well our plan is that we will have our second child when our first one is 7 or older. We believe that having two children will be easier if one of them helps out with the other. That way, our first will feel like he is still an important part of the family and we would have a little helper with another baby. Also, when our oldest is a teenager and starting to rebel and roam away from home, we still have another child that needs us and always wants us around. That would make it better for us to handle our first's teenage years. Hope this helped out with your decision. smile heart
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Posted: Sun May 20, 2007 11:27 pm
My fiancee and i were planing on having another baby fairly soon after we were married because our daughter is nearly 4 now but we were a little surprised last march when i found out I was pregnant again an even more surprised with the twin thing but we do want some more children in a few more years but we don't truly have a fiance problem i have a trust fund from my godmother and jays a mechanic and he makes a good living off that
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2007 10:05 am
My husband doesn't want there to be more than a 4 year difference, he wants to make sure then get along.
Chasidy- Alora is going to be a year old June 5th, the only thing bad about having kids that far apart is that they don't tend to get along.
Lux- Mind if I ask how many kids you want in the long run?
I fear that I'm no longer going to be able to afford my birth control anymore, the insurance won't cover it for another 90 days..And it would still cost $50 after it covers it. I also have to wait at least a year until my insurance will cover the pregnancy, so all of this leaves me no where. What good is insurance if you can't get anything still.
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2007 9:39 pm
I'm sorry you won't be able to afford your BC much longer. Hopefully you'll get things figured out soon. Me and my husband are going through similar problems. Neither one of us have insurance, Aeryn does just not us, and my IUD has been causing me EVIL cramps and Pelvic inflamation and infections. We can't really afford BC. I though DO want to get pregnant a couple months after Aeryn turns one in July. He doesn't though.
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Posted: Fri May 25, 2007 10:50 pm
I feel so...I don't know..I've read that after you're on the shot for a while that you're pretty much sterile for 9-12 months..But I don't feel protected like I did when I was on the shot..(I was suppose to get it last Monday).
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Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2007 11:09 am
This is my experience with siblings.
My sister and I were born 18 months appart. I was a happy child from all accounts untill that screaming blob of flesh came home and stole all my mom's attention from me. I turned from a happy little girl to a miserable, introverted child, who's only goal was to make my sister's life a living hell. Which I still do to this day.
Now we'll head over to Ken's family, 4 boys, with 4 years between the eldest & 2nd eldest, 2 years between the 2nd and Kenn, and another 2 years between Kenn and his younger brother. Dan, the eldest, lived to make Nick's life miserable, up untill Kenn was born... then once Kenn was old enough, he conscripted Kenn into the eternal torment of poor little Nick. And when Tim was born and grew up a bit they all turned on him, and decided he was their new target.
So basically, what I'm trying to say, is the age of the sibblings doesn't really mean much... 2 years or 8 years apart, you can never garentee that your children will get along.
I personally plan on waiting till Keiara's atleast in school all day before considering having a 2nd. I refuse to deal with two sets of diapers at once. Not to mention it'll be easier to devide my attention between two completely dependent rugrats when they're not together at all times.
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Posted: Sat Aug 18, 2007 11:24 pm
i want 5 kids my finacee wants 4
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