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Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 2:59 pm


Chapter One

Of all the people I liked the least, Jared Gart was at the bottom of my list. He was the one that went out of his way to make life miserable for me. He tripped me in the halls, he bumped me so I fell on the sidewalk, and when I used to cry, he would always laugh. It had been like that ever since I'd met him back in the third grade. I don't know why he doesn't like me; maybe I looked at him funny. But for some reason, whenever he's around my life suddenly gets worse. Of course, I can't accuse him of anything. I don't have any proof. Not to mention he's a teacher's pet. He makes me want to scream, or else sink through a hole to middle of the Earth. And I can't do either, the latter because there aren't any holes that deep, and the former because of my pride. Me and my stupid pride.
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 7:03 am


Very short (I'm assuming there's more), but it seems like a solid exposition to me. I especially like how you emphasize "pride" by repeating the sentence; five words, but it does give a little more of a peek into the character personality. I like it so far smile

Sachi_x
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Domerin Thompson

PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 6:51 pm


...It is short so I can't really think much of it.
PostPosted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 2:11 pm


Yeah, I didn't have much time to write it (the librarian was hovering over me), but I wanted to get something down. There will be more, lots more. All my stories are set up to be long.

Adding:

What really makes me mad, though, is that I can't do anything about it. I try to ignore him, but that just doesn't seem to work. I hate how every else always thinks he's so great. They have no idea how he really is. Come to think of it, I'm not sure I do either. Especially since that one time, the time he-

I'm getting ahead of myself. Of course you won't know about that. It isn't something that I generally write down. But I suppose I have to put it in, to show the two sides of him that I've seen.

It was last spring, in seventh grade. Our school always goes to an island for the last weekend of the school year, and this year was so warm we all decided to go swimming. I love to swim, and I'm pretty good at it, too. I feel so at home in the water.

As always, I was the first in the water. The sky was full of dark clouds. I'd been swimming there forever, so I didn't think anything about it. I didn't think that I wasn't supposed to go so far out. I didn't even listen when the teachers started yelling. Everyone was always yelling at the beach; I just didn't pay attention to it.

When I saw the wave, it was too late to get away. I was a good swimmer, but this wasn't something I should have been out in. The wave crashed over my head. I held my breath automatically until I surfaced again. I had turned away from the shore, so I looked behind me. The teachers were sending the others inside, but they were all watching anxiously.

I was afraid, I admit it. I thought I was going to die right there. I wasn't afraid of dying; I was afraid because there was so much that I hadn't done yet, that I would never experience. But I consoled myself with the fact that at least was going to die in the water I loved so much.

That was why I was so surprised when a hand gripped my arm just above my elbow. I looked and saw black hair plastered to a white face. Brown eyes flashed dangerously, and the lips were pressed into a thin line. Jared Gart had swum out to save me. I wished I would've died right there.

He pulled me under the water, where it was calmer, and towed me along until our heads broke above the water and we were walking on the sandy shore. Teachers surrounded us and threw dry towels over our shoulders. They led us back to the hotel where we always stayed, and had a doctor look at us both. Then they sent us back to our rooms.

I swear, it was the most embarrassing moment of my life. I couldn't believe he had rescued me. He had willingly risked his own life for mine. It almost made me sick. After that, I could hardly look at him. But I couldn't help wonder, why? Why would he care if I lived or died? After all, he'd never cared before. I was angry, disappointed, relieved, and scared, all at the same time. It just had to be Jared Gart, didn't it? It couldn't have been anyone else?

One thought crossed my mind before I fell alseep that night. I didn't know he could swim so well.

Cherished Strawberries

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Domerin Thompson

PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2007 10:55 pm


Okay so far ... keep going? (You've gotten me interested.)
PostPosted: Tue May 01, 2007 6:23 pm


((Yay! I'm just making this up out of nothing. I've never written anything like this in my life. I have limited time to write, so this will take a while to get anywhere. I apologize.))


When I awoke the next day, I felt terrible. I was sore all over, my lungs hurt terribly, like I couldn't get enough air, and there was a hideous, purple buise on my right arm where Jared had grabbed me. I hadn't given my roommate Sarah any time to interrogate me (which is what she would have done), so I knew that I wouldn't have any peace until I gave her all the details.

Sarah was the Seventh-Grade Gossip, not my friend. That was her title. One of the boys started it, and it just seemed to stick. She hadn't seemed to get mad when we called her that; I think she liked it. But it definately summed her up pretty well. (She hasn't changed at all this year, except now she's the Every-Grade Gossip.) I wanted to avoid her...badly.

I deliberately went for breakfast early, because Sarah is a known heavy-sleeper. She doesn't wake up any time before eight. Knowing she would seek me out like a bloodhound, I decided to make the most of my freedom. I went to the beach and sat on an outcropping of rock to watch the sun climb higher in the sky.

After a while, I saw Sarah come out of the hotel. She was wearing a bright red bikini and had her blonde hair tied up in pigtails. She turned her head every which way, looking for me. I got up as slowly as I could and inched backwards towards a low cliff several feet behind me. I edged up against the cool, slippery rocks and felt my left hand back into emptiness.

I glanced to my left and stared. There was a low opening in the rocks. It was just in range of the waves, and I knew that I couldn't hide there for too long. It was dangerous; the water would fill it up, and I didn't know if there was any other way in, or how deep into the cliff it went. I sighed. I liked caves. I decided that I would come back when the tide was ebbing, so I would have time to explore. Resigned, I straightened up and went to face the Every-Grade Gossip. I knew I was in for a long talk by the set of her face. Her eyes locked onto me as I climbed over the rocks and onto the sand.

I walked forward and greeted her, a little too half-heartedly than she would have liked. I gave a deep, inward sigh, and went off to give up all of the answers I had. Which weren't many. Either way, the truth would be greatly embellished until I had fallen overboard while sailboating, and Jared fought off Great White sharks, killer whales, eels, and a jellyfish or two to save me from drowning. Then she would say he nursed me back to health, hovering worriedly over me until the teachers yelled at him to go away. Then she would add a few kisses here and there, maybe some roses or dinner for two.

My mind reeled with all of the possibilities. I nearly keeled over right there. Silently, I prayed that just this once, Sarah would keep the facts I gave her from the romance she wanted to describe. It was a vain hope, and I knew it even then.

Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2007 1:48 pm


I'm interested as well smile I like how your writing style is simple and concise, but balanced well with the rate at which you reveal plot.
PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2007 3:43 pm


((I've had practice, is all. And a very picky English teacher. I just put down the logical turn of events. Okay, first dialogue. And her name is now Katy, because I said.))

Lunch was a nightmare, as usual. People kept staring at me and whispering. I saw Sarah, and she waved--waved--at me. I could barely find a place to sit down. Finally, I stole a chair another table wasn't using and pulled it over to where my two friends, Emma and Lilian, were sitting. We talked for a while.

"Are you okay?" was the first thing Emma said. "We saw you go out yesterday, but then the teachers made us go inside. What happened?"

I sighed.

"Oh," said Lilian. "You got caught by the Seventh-Grade Gossip, huh?"

"Yeah," I said. "Before she ruins my reputation, though, I'll have to tell you guys what really happened."

"So we can spread the truth, not nasty lies," Emma said.

So I told them.

"Strike that," Lilian said. "We cannot spread the truth, not when it sounds like that, but nor will we spread that romance junk Sarah comes up with."

"We'll come up with something," Emma said. "You'll be the victim, and Gart will be the terrible villain. Like in horror stories."

"Nothing too drastic, Em, Lil," I said. "I only want him to leave me alone. And get Sarah off my back."

So we worked it out. I was no longer a damsel in distress, though I came close with Lilian's original story. There was no kissing or romance involved. Here's the story that my two best friends in the whole world started spreading that very day.

"Poor Katy. It was terrible. She went out to swim yesterday, remember? It was going to rain, so the teachers all sent us in, right? But Katy couldn't hear because of the water. So along comes Mister Teacher's Pet, Jared Gart, and he swims out like some sort of shark or something, and he grabs her arm and pulls her back with a death grip on her arm. She's all bruised up. She insisted she could swim just fine; after all, our Katy is captain of the swim team. But he just shakes his head and squeezes her arm tighter. Then, when they reach the shore, all the teachers go fussing over him, congratulating the 'little hero.' Ugh, it makes me sick. He gets through life on his looks, and he expects people to admire him. The nerve! Can you imagine?"

It went on like that for a while. Every time it was retold, another bit got twisted more and more. No romance, but now Jared seemed like a demon-thing from the depths of hell. I liked it.

Oh, how I love Emma and Lilian. They've always stood by me. They stuck with me when Jared starting picking on me. They're tough girls, like me, so when he didn't quit, they started pushing his friends around. I made them quit, but they really hold a grudge. That's what I get for being friends with Emma the Goth and Punk Lilian. My parents thought I was crazy, but I still think it was a good idea to be their friend. After all, now we have our own personal bodyguards: each other.

And boy did I need them. Because after dinner, when the "truth" had reached every ear, I saw three people coming towards me, three people I least wanted to see: Principal Jords, my homeroom teacher Mrs. Heln, and, you guessed it, Jared Gart. My worst nightmare.

((Man, I like ending my writing like this. whee ))

Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Sat May 19, 2007 5:32 pm


Dun dun dun... I want to see what they say whee Big, scary, dramatic endings are always fun :3
PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2007 9:22 am


Agreed ... ((To interested in the story to point out writing mistakes, if any.))

Domerin Thompson


Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Thu May 31, 2007 12:49 pm


((Crud, I've been off way too long. And I do need to go back and fix my last post. Stupid mistakes everywhere, now that I re-read it. Back to the story.))

In the room Principal Emily Jords and Mrs. Heln shared, I was stared down. Mrs. Heln was tapping her purple, four-inch heeled foot impatiently, and Principal Jord had crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at me. Jared Gart was looking angrily out the window. His black hair, cut longer than most boys at my school, flopped in his face so I could barely see his eyes in the window's reflection. I swallowed to clear the lump in my throat, and looked back at the two women. Principal Jords spoke first.

"Katherine, there is a nasty rumor going around, invovling both you and Mr. Gart," she said. I winced inwardly as she used my full name. "The tale that reached my ears was that when you went out into the water yesterday, Mr. Gart here viciously swam out to attack you. Students are saying that Mr. Gart is the same as a monster, the way he continuously torments you. Now, Katherine, I would like to know, who started this rumor?"

My heart was beating hard, and my brain was working very quickly. Lying would get me into trouble, I knew that. But telling the truth would be just as bad. Because Emma and Lilian were the ones who actually started telling the lies (and because they were already on bad terms with just about everyone), they would get in trouble as well. Three weeks' detention, maybe more since it was Jared. After all, she called him 'Mr. Gart.'

They were staring at me, openly angry now. Even Jared had shifted his eyes to see my reflection on the window, wanting to hear what I had to say. I opened my mouth to speak, not knowing what I would say. Suddenly, I knew what to do. It was obviously not the best idea in the world, but I knew I had to do it.

"I did."

Mrs. Heln stopped tapping her foot, Principal Jords' arms uncrossed, and Jared turned to stare, bewilderment pasted to each of their faces. I kept my face completely devoid of any emotion. I focused my eyes on the wall behind my two teachers. They looked at each other, then at me.

"Katy, why?" Mrs. Heln asked. "What has Jared done to you to make you say such things about him? For crying out loud, he saved your life yesterday!"

She stopped short there, and everyone looked at her in shock. It was true but no one had said it out loud. I was completely dumbfounded. What was I supposed to say? Because he's always picking on me, for no reason at all? Because Sarah would've turned the whole thing into a romance if I hadn't? Because all the teachers love him like some sort of god? Because I'm never good enough for him? Because if I had the choice of dying at sea or having him save me, I don't know what I would choose? Because all I think of is him...?

"I only said he swam out to get me and pulled me back without my permission," I said. "I have a reputation as captain of the swim team to uphold. People just started to add to it, I don't know who."

They stared at me. I could tell Jared wasn't convinced, but it didn't matter. All I had to do was get the teachers on my side. Then I'd be safe.

"Very well, Katherine," Principal Jords said. "You should know by now that spreading rumors is a terrible business. It'll get you in trouble. Even if you only spread a little rumor, it grows. So, despite your intentions, you will be given detention. You will help the school custodians every day from four to six, until I tell you you may stop. Whether your punishment will continue into the summer is my decision. You and Mr. Gart are dismissed."
PostPosted: Wed Jun 06, 2007 2:06 pm


I don't know who wanted to get out of that room faster: me or Jared. I couldn't tell. We both had to walk out after I apologized to Jared, and I went first. I swear, right then, I never wanted to see his face again. I could have just cried and cried, I was so humiliated. But of course, I couldn't. He was watching.

I walked fast, since we weren't allowed to run in the building. I was already at the staircase, my foot on the first step, when I heard Jared call me back. I didn't move for a second. I was sorely tempted to just run up the stairs to Emma and Lilian's room, where they would no doubt be waiting for me. Instead, I turned slowly to facce him.

"Why did you lie?" he asked.

His voice was unemotional but not cold, as I had expected. I shrugged.

"Who said I lied?" I asked. He knew I'd lied. He knew I knew he knew I'd lied. But he was still letting me say it. I silently cursed him to the lowest depths of hell.

For a split second, I saw intense hatred on his face, and I thought he was about to hit me. Then he smiled. He smiled. At me.

"Even you wouldn't have come up with something like that on your own," he said coolly. "So, was it those two girls you always hang out with? The goth and the punk?"

"Emma and Lilian had nothing to do with it," I said heatedly. I regreted it instantly. My temper had always gotten the best of me. But I couldn't tell the truth; who knows if he would go tattle to Principal Jords? I couldn't trust him. I wouldn't trust him.

"Suit yourself," he said. "But I'd watch out. Accidents can happen anywhere."

Then he was gone, quietly descending the stairs to the boys' floor. I sagged, then straightened as I walked up the stairs. Maybe he was just giving a friendly warning. 'Accidents can happen anywhere.' Right. Like that was a friendly warning. He was out to get me, I just knew it. As I entered the deserted hall of the girls' floor, I bypassed Emma and Lilian's room and went straight to my own. I ignored Sarah's disgustingly cheerful inquiries about where I had been, changed clothes, and went straight to bed feeling very, very sick.

Cherished Strawberries

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Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 26, 2007 2:28 pm


((This probably won't be very good, since the original post I was going to put up got lost...a.k.a. the computer died. I'm sorry about not knowing much about the tides and everything.))

The next morning, I woke up hot and sticky. I looked over at the room's thermostat. Ugh. Sarah had been messing with it; it now read 80 degrees. Sarah is a heat freak; she can't be anywhere under 75 degrees without making a fuss. Winter is a real problem for her. I threw off my comforter, turned the thermostat down to 70, and dressed in shorts, sandals, and a tank top before going down for breakfast. I saw a lot of my classmates glance at me as I walked by. When they noticed me watching, they immediately looked anywhere else. I got my breakfast and ate quickly, returning to my room as Sarah was coming down. I passed by without seeming to see her, though she was trying to get my attention.

Up in my room, I thought of everything I could do to be alone. There was no place that wasn't supervised by at least one teacher, and kids were everywhere. No, that wasn't entirely true. There was one place, one that I was pretty sure no one knew about: the cave I'd found. Yeah, that would be a good hideout. I'd decided. I grabbed whatever I thought I'd need (flashlight, batteries, candles and matches in case the flashlight went out, bright chalk and flourescant paint, a bag of chips and a sandwich for lunch, rope, and a pair of hiking boots) and shoved it in my backpack. I thought about telling Emma and Lilian about where I was headed, so they wouldn't worry, but decided against it. They would just think I wanted to be alone in my room. They'd be right, too, although I wouldn't be in my room. Cautiously, I headed out to the cave.

Let me tell you, a cave is a wonderful thing. It was about 65 degrees in there, and the temperature never changed all year. I knew that much about caves. There was a smooth little path for me to take, always on a gradual incline. Despite the fact that I was walking leisurely along a single path, I marked my way by drawing little arrows with the paint and chalk I'd brought. Shining my flashlight along the walls, I saw several bats. I doubted that they liked my flashlight, so I took care not to shine it directly on them for a while. When I started to get hungry, I guaged it was around lunchtime and people would have started to wonder where I was. I turned back, going faster than I had on my way in.

The bad thing about caves is that you get so caught up in the beauty and wonder of it that you forget to watch where you're going. I had my flashlight's beam pointed on the gound, but it cast light up into the ceiling of rock above me. I'm a curious girl by nature, so my eyes were practically glued to that. Needless to say, it was a huge surprise when my feet slid out from under me, my bottom landing on slippery, wet rocks. The shock and pain made me go numb for a moment, and in that moment I let go of the flashlight. I scambled to grab for it as it slid into the water in font of me, but I was too slow. As the light flickered and then went out, I fumbled in my backpack for candles and matches. I lit a match and shakily held the flame to the candle wick. Before the match burned too low, I threw it into the water, feeling a grim cold settle over me as it hissed and smoked.

The tide had come in, and I was trapped. I mentioned that the trail I was on was going up, didn't I? Well, the problem with that was that my trail was now completely closed up with water. I didn't even know how far the trail was covered, so I wasn't about to risk trying to swim out. I didn't know if I could hold my breath for as long as I might have to. So I sat, ate half my sandwich, and waited. The tide would have to go out sooner or later. But everyone would start to worry before that happened. They'd have people searching the whole beach, the hotel, anywhere. But they wouldn't find me. Of course they wouldn't. The cave's entrance was blocked off by water. I was stuck.
PostPosted: Sat Aug 04, 2007 12:46 pm


((I did some research on the tides, so I might be a bit more accurate. If you see something wrong, please tell me, so I can change it.))

I don't know how long I was sitting there, shivering and trying to keep my candle from going out. It kept flickering and threatening to go out completely, and I was terrified that it would. I cried on and off, worrying. what if no one could find me? What if no one knew I was gone? What if they did, but didn't care? The thoughts running through my head were by no means comforting. I knew, somewhere in the back of my mind, that my fears were imagined, but the back of your head is a far away place when you're stuck in a cave.

A long while later, I realized that the water was a few inches further away from me. I was surprised for a moment, then shocked my own stupidity. Of course it was further away. The tide was ebbing. Granted, it would take about six hours to go out completely, but I only needed it to go out enough for me to get out of the cave. I settled myself to wait, trying to be brave.

It must have been at least an hour or two later that I saw a dark shadow in the water. I'd been following the tide closely, so I jumped back, terrified. What if it was some sort of giant fish or something? When a head of black hair broke the surface and a tall, thin body dragged itself up, I was very near tears. Then I realized what it was.

((I'll finish later. Blame my crappy sister and mother.))

Cherished Strawberries

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Cherished Strawberries

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 04, 2007 5:25 pm


As Jared lifted himself out of the water, I can honestly (though not proudly) say that I was happier to see him there than anyone else on the planet. He looked at me carefully, though I could tell he was more than a little angry and...relieved? I didn't think of all this until later. Right then, I had been afraid. I felt tears running down my cheeks as I flung myself into his arms and clung to him. he resisted me for a moment, then held me tightly, murmuring softly in my ears. I don't remember exactly what he said (something to reassure me), but he didn't push me away or yell at me, and that was all that mattered. After a little bit, I stopped crying, but I didn't let go, as embarrassed as I was. Finally, though, he spoke.

"No one could find you," he said. "So they sent everyone out as a search party. I figured you'd be out here, but you should have realized the tide would come in."

"I know," I said, and sniffed loudly. "I wasn't thinking straight."

"I was scared," he whispered. "We looked everywhere, but you'd disappeared."

Then he said it, those three words that I will never forget. And I said them back, and I meant them. Then he was kissing me, and I was kissing him back. Those words, I love you, changed our lives. I won't forget what they did. But I think I can forgive them. Someday.

"Come on," he said breathlessly. "We'll have to get back out soon, otherwise they'll report me missing, too. You only have to swim a few yards under water."

I nodded, and he helped me with my things. It would get wet, but there was no helping that. He went into the water first, but I wasn't far behind. We swam close together, and my head broke over the surface of the water only a few feet from his. Then we were walking back along the beach, my face red from shame and puffy from crying.

They all made a huge fuss over me, yelling at me, crying over me, patting me on the back, chewing me out. No one mentioned the fact that Jared had found me. No one seemed to care that he hadn't left my side. But I did. It meant more to me than the world. And that night, after everyone was in bed, I thought about him. If he loved me, why had he always made me cry? Why did it give him pleasure to see me in pain? Or had I imagined that part?
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