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 Posted: Tue Mar 20, 2007 6:07 pm
I often find myself getting lost in a sad place because of my home life. My step-father, drinks Budweiser & Icehouse from the time he get's up in the morning till the time he passes out at night. I'm so tired of him...I know there is a such thing as responsibility...but really, do I have to get up at 12:40 on a school night just to get him a can of beer?! He overexurts me with retarded things. So I LIVE in my bedroom...I'm serious if I had a friggin' refrigerator I would be set.
All I EVER seem to do is go home - go straight to my room and until I need to attend to his every little whim then go back into my room. It's my sanctuary...my dwelling place. It's the only place where I can be alone. I don't DARE to go outside because he ridicules me and to give you an example, I was outside in the living room watching tv for 5 min and he kept staring at me, I asked him why he was and he said I looked like s**t. I walked back into my room...where I am HOURS everyday and he told me not to walk away when he's talking to me. I said he hurt me verbally and I wanted nothing more of him. Being the drunk a*****e that he was he lectured me on respect. What a ******** hypocrite!
He always verbally and mentally hurts me and I take it personally seeming that I hear it everyday, and my mom works nights, so I don't really get to see her. I go to school and come back at 3:45 staying in my room until 11:30 PM.
I'm so sick of it...
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 12:29 pm
Are you old enough to move out or live in your own?
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2007 7:22 pm
sadly no, I'm only 13 (soon to be 14 in a matter of 4 weeks) so I can't go anywhere.
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Posted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 11:30 am
Does your mom know what's going on? Have you told her any of what you told us?
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Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2007 10:07 pm
Nikolita Does your mom know what's going on? Have you told her any of what you told us? Your mom DEFINITELY needs to know. Believe it or not, this is a form of child abuse. A drunken guardian is a useless guardian. His verbal abuse is making you hide in your room all day, which isn't healthy for you. And making you get him beer in the middle of the night? Give me a ******** break! He is a loser, and you are not his slave girl. Talk to your mom, and if she won't do anything, talk to your school counselors.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 6:46 am
That story was just horrible, I could barely image how it must be. You need to tell someone for sure, first your mom, if that doesn't work. Child Services might be able to help, but that may just be the limit.
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Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 5:17 am
It will be hard, but I would talk to a teacher or a guidance councselor that you are comfortable with. I used go live in a home where I wasn't loved and where I stayed holed up all the time, hardly ever going anywhere besides home and school, so I understand where you're coming from. Just minus the alcohol. I do hope you get help hun. smile
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Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 12:42 am
yeah, if your mother doesn't try to put a stop to it then tell a guidance counselor. i lived like you sort of and i just didn't want to tell a counselor even though thats what everyone said. i told them "its not that easy" when realy it would of been easier. i got some kind of cabin fever type thing and had a mental breakdown in the middle of school. i wish i would of taken the alternative route.
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Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 9:24 pm
if you need to get out of the house, I'd suggest staying at friends houses.
I know that when my friends have problems at home, I try to have them over as much as possible.
tell a friend that you hate being at home, and see if you can hang out.
sleep over sometimes, and try to get out.
since you're young, there aren't many options for you.
Maybe if you're out more, your step-father will get used to getting along without you, and won't make you work on his every whim.
but definetly tell your mom. Just get her alone one day, and say "Mom, [whatever you refer to your step-dad as] has really been upsetting me lately. He makes me get up at 12:40 on school nights to get him a beer, I don't understand why he can't get it himself?"
If you start like that, it might help your mom realise there might be a problem.
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2007 8:44 am
My mother already knows...she's not able to really do much about it. She has a night shift from 2 in the afternoon to 1 am. That sucks...really.
I turned 14 though, and I plan to get my permit. I don't know what that'll do...but I hope It's some way of an escape route...it's not getting worse. It's the same...but doing the same thing...over...and over...UGH. It really aggravates your nerves.
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Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 6:07 pm
It doesn't matter what hours your mother works. This is the man she brought into your life to be your provider and protector. She needs to MAKE the time to fix this. Even if she gets home at 1 am and wakes his a** up, or hey, talks to him before she goes to work, she needs to step up to the plate and take some responsibility in this and discuss it with your step-father.
You can always go speak to a school counselor about it, and they may talk to your mother and inform her that social services will be called if the situation doesn't change.
You don't deserve this, and it's truly a form of abuse.
Try getting involved in some after-school activities so you don't go home as soon, and when you do get home, do your homework and tell your stepdad he can serve himself because you're taking care of your own education.
If he wakes you up in the night, tell him to get the hell out of your room. If he can walk into your room, he can walk to the fridge to get a beer. Better yet, lock your door, and if it doesn't lock, put a chair under the doorknob to wedge it shut.
Good luck, and keep us updated.
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Posted: Tue Apr 24, 2007 1:47 am
I agree, there is a lot your mother could do about the situation. She could talk to him, give him an ultimatum, leave him. I mean, really, who is she putting first? You or herself? He doesn't sound like he contributes a hell of a lot to the household apart from drinking away all the money so it's not like she needs him in order to survive.
He is abusing you. It is emotional abuse. The reason being because he is unpredictable and irrational in addition to the verbal abuse.
If your mum cares about you as her child, she will do something about this "man." As far as I am concerned, if my fiance was like that, he would be out the door sooner than you can blink. You don't have people like that around your kids. And then to say "there's not a lot I can do about it" is just pathetic.
It's one thing to have bad judgement and low self-esteem when it's just yourself but not when kids are involved.
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