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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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 Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 12:08 am
Post any joke you find or know
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Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 1:28 pm
Yay! I have a corny joke to share! domokun
What did Delaware?
She wore a brand New Jersey!
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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 3:11 pm
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 8:04 am
Ha!
I know it was. Truly shameful. gonk redface
Should we keep this G-rated or can we got up to like Pg13 or something?
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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 2:43 pm
Bishiekisser Ha!
I know it was. Truly shameful. gonk redface
Should we keep this G-rated or can we got up to like Pg13 or something?
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Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2007 6:22 pm
Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney. "Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!" "Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are ye callin' from?"
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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 4:28 pm
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Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 7:44 pm
Blondes and Their Logic
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........ and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.......... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida...?????"
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor" She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!" "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2007 2:16 pm
nameiwantedwastaken Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney. "Did you see the paper?" asked Gallagher. "They say I died!!" "Yes, I saw it!" replied Finney. "Where are ye callin' from?" that was a funny one. lol Here's mine: a girl gets a call from the cops and tells her that they found her drivers license. While the girl was going up there she just realized that she doesn't know exactly where the police station is. So she drives around the area looking for the police station, she sees fire trucks, mail trucks and ambulences. Finally she sees a cop empting out his car. She drive up to him and asks "Is this the police station?" The police officer looks at her with disbelief. With a smerk on his face he looks at the girl and says. "No maim this is a donute rally. (just so you know this really happend lol *no me one of my friends*)
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Posted: Sat Apr 28, 2007 10:21 am
True story:
A comedian was in Mississippi performing, when someone in the audience yelled "hey, stop making fun of us, we ain't stupid" to which the comedian replied that he was only going off the facts that Mississippi was 50th in the nation for education value. To this the same audience member yelled back, "At least we ain't last!"
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nameiwantedwastaken Captain
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Posted: Sat May 26, 2007 7:18 am
This is mine---> There's 2 muffins in side and oven the first muffin turns to the second muffin and says...
muffin 1:hey dude it's hot in here
Then the second muffin turns to the first muffin and yells...
muffin 2 surprised _O HOLEY CRUD A TALKING MUFFIN!!!
whee
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Posted: Thu Jun 28, 2007 8:41 am
he he... these jokes are pretty good! rofl
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Posted: Sun Jul 01, 2007 10:56 am
Four men got together to play golf one sunny morning. As they were heading out to the course, one of them was detained by a phone call.The other three were discussing their children while walking to the first tee.
"My son," said one proudly, "has made quite a name for himself in the home building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful, in fact in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."
The second man, not to be outdone, boasts how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a friend two brand new cars as a gift."
The third man brags that his son has worked his way up through a stock brokerage firm, and has become so successful that in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.
As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, the three smugly tell him that they have been discussing how successful their progeny are, and ask what line of work his son is in.
"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased how my son has turned out," he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay."
As the other three recoil in horror, he continues, "but on the bright side, he must be good at what he does, because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two new cars, and a big stock portfolio."
rofl
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Posted: Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:54 pm
These jokes are great!! rofl
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