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 Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 10:22 pm
Ah, the bliss of the countryside; no matter how much one could complain about the relative dullness of the seemingly unending flow of trees and meadowlands, there was a certain freedom, a certain...serenity, to be found when out alone and simply enjoying the company of one's thoughts.
Of course, this didn't mean that Guilian wouldn't mind SHARING those thoughts...it was all about who with.
Being a father was a different thing from being a prospective father, that much was certain. His children were certainly a charming trio, and Izusa wasn't QUITE as hostile...sort of. But she still maintained some ridiculous ideals.
Today was the first time he'd gotten a chance to be out and about since the foals had been born, and he, for one, was enjoying it. Once again he was free and unfettered...just as it should be.
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Posted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 8:31 pm
The purple mare was frolicking. That's right, she was actually frolicking. Of coursre, that wasn't anything new for the fractious mare. She was quite a playful lady, given the right circumstances. Currently her playmates were a bunch of squirrels.
The game currently was a cross between tag and dodge-cone. A squirrel would scurry down a tree trunk and chitter scoldingly at her. With a whicker and a pivot of her hooves, she'd point her nose at it and dart forwards. The squirrel would of course scramble back up to safety while another squirrel elsewhere would dash down to scold her. She'd spin and dart the new direction, all in a swirl of appealingly tangled curls. But meanwhile, their cohorts would intermittently hurl pinecones from the trees above, which she would have to lithely avoid while making for the next squirrel-bait.
All in all she found it a very invigorating and amusing game. Noone got hurt, but it was wonderful exercise, keeping her lucious body fit and muscular. The only time anyone regretted playing the game is if she tripped, or if she wasn't fast enough to avoid the missles.
Today she was at her finest, mock-snapping at a few tails she got terribly close to, and easily weaving herself away from the thrown cones. But mid-game, a flash of brilliant color caught her eye, and she turned to see what was passing with such a flashy hide. She focused on the splash of red and discovered to her delight that it was her old buddy, Guilian! She stopped dead, staring with appreciation as a breeze rippled his black-tipped curls and his muscles flexed beneath his shining skin.
THUNK! THUNK! A pinecone plummeted to smack her noggin, and immediately another one stung her rump. With a startled squeal, she pinned her ears and tucked her hind legs, snaking out her head to snap her teeth menacingly at her former playmates. "That HURT!" she snorted irately. Her tail swished in her mild temper, but in the space of a few moments her anger ran out, though she still snorted warning at the scurrying rodents. "That's enough of THAT game, I assure you," she spoke to them directly, ears only slightly turned back in displeasure.
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Posted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 10:28 am
Much as his target goal was freedom, it was freedom from family that he was after, the freedom of a single stallion out doing what he wanted, when he wanted. For that reason, Luca's sudden exclamation, coming out of nowhere as it did, was merely a surprise and not a source of dismay.
On the contrary, he was delighted with the knowledge that Luca was about; ever since their last encounter's somewhat rough ending, he had wanted to talk to the sultry mare, to apologize for putting her in a situation to earn Izusa's wrath. Just because he himself was willing to play with fire...didn't mean that everyone else did.
So it was with a willing step that he moved in Luca's direction, an amused smile playing on his lips. "My goodness, Luca-Chica, if I didn't know better I'd say you'd lost your touch!"
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Posted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 6:24 pm
Her ears pricked forward immediately upon hearing the smooth, beguiling voice of the red stallion. Ah, now here was company she could have fun with! But one ear flicked back as she recalled the last time they'd met. She hadn't minded so very much... the kalona did have a stronger claim on him than she did. She would have to tread lightly if he had chosen himself a mate. While she didn't mind his attentions, his being mated put an entirely different spin on things.
Thus it was with a slihglty cool tone that she replied, "Which touch would it be that I lost, Guilian dear?" Her tail swished in a very faint warning. "For I've certainly lost your touch." She couldn't help it. She pouted at him, bobbing her head low and letting her thick curls fall across both eyes fetchingly while huffing gently. "After all, you are another mare's territory now."
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Posted: Tue Mar 20, 2007 3:46 pm
Laughing, Guilian sauntered up to Luca, black eyes dancing with amusement. "I was referring to your touch when it comes to dealing with obnoxious situations, Chica; if memory serves, you're a dapper hand at laughing such things off."
His tone was teasing as he came to a stop beside the mare, though his expression was more than a bit skeptical upon hearing her last words. "Another mare's territory, am I?" Moving a bit closer, he nuzzled a bit at Luca's neck, the touch light but definitely sensual. "Can't say I agree on that one, Chica, for all I know where you're coming from. As always...I merely belong to myself."
And that was enough, wasn't it?
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 3:26 pm
She wasn't going to be distracted so easily this time, though, sweet as his caresses may be. She laid her ears back faintly and gave a soft squeal to remind him to please keep to the current discussion and not interrupt it with his philanderings. "It seems that the last I heard, a mare did indeed claim you as hers, with good reason."
She sidled to look him in the eyes, her own pale blue eyes thoughtful and judging. "After all, it was your foals she was carrying, and I'd think by now they would have been born." She gave a snort and tossed her head, a motion to show how free she was of such things, compared to him. "Don't you have duties to her and the foals to be accomplishing, buddy boy?"
She snorted again and champed her teeth lightly, bending to paw a furrow in the soft ground. She wasn't comfortable with this. She felt trapped, for she had every intentino of honoring the other mare's rightful claim to him, but he was telling her differently. Whom should she believe? It made her irritable to be caught in such an odd situation, and swished her tail furiously back and forth a few times before again meeting his eyes.
"You put me in a questionable situation. So please, be honest. Aren't you beholden to her and the foals?" Yes, as women usually will do, it was a trap. A trick question, for if he wasn't, then what kind of stallion was he to love and leave? And if he was, what was he doing here, seducing her? She held his gaze this time, waiting for his answer.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 3:52 pm
Perhaps other males would have blushed, felt ashamed, or otherwise felt on the rocks at being asked a direct question like that. However, Guilian was no ordinary stallion; rather than reacting in the stereotypical fashion, he actually laughed. However, at the same time he took a step back, giving Luca a thoroughly amused look.
"Fie, Chica, for you to think so cruelly of me. Have I truly made that sort of impression on you? Well, let me see if I can't set the record straight."
With that, he adopted a stance of complete casuality, as though he HADN'T just been putting the moves on ANYONE, least of all the mare he was currently talking to. But then, he wasn't gripped with need as he had previously been, either...which made it easier to think straight.
"Let me see, which shall I address first? Well, to start off with, it is true that the foals are born, Chica; two handsome young boys and one delightful little filly. All three are currently in their baskets, but I don't doubt that they will be making an appearance soon."
Tossing back his mane, the stallion strolled a few steps to the side, then turned and looked directly at the mare. "As to the facts, let me lay it bare for you, Chica."
"I have never once knowingly led a mare to believe I was looking for commitment. Even in the case of innocents, I have always been honest about what I am, though the exact method of informing varies from mare to mare. Ultimately, though, I let everyone know that I am ultimately an affair, not a relationship. However, sometimes, despite my best intentions, mares see things differently."
Sighing, he paced a few more steps, no longer looking at Luca but gazing into the distance. "Izusa-Chica is one of the anomalies. You might not believe it to look at her or to hear her, but when I met her she was an insecure, lonely mare. She had no idea of her own worth or that she could be desirable to stallions; I was able to prove differently." Here a smug, purely sensual smile crossed the stallion's lips, but it was short-lived.
"Never before has any mare conceived by me. I had no idea that she would be the first to break the trend. However, she did indeed conceive, and one only has to look at the foals to know that they are indeed mine. However, in spite of my admissions, in spite of my tellings, in spite of her finding me with you, she has difficulties accepting the fact that I am NOT sexually committed to her. You should understand where I am coming from there, Luca-Chica, and I don't doubt that she will in time. But in the meantime...."
"I am not turning my back on either Izusa or my foals, Chica. I was on my own as a foal, I do plan on my own children being the same. I plan on being an active part of their lives, raising them and helping with their support. That does NOT mean I am committed to their mother, though, nor does it mean I ever will be. One can be responsible without being tied down."
Then he was turning, looking at Luca with raised brows. "Does that clear things up at all?"
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:29 pm
She pursed her lips as she listened and let him pace as he needed to. By the time he was finished, her eyes and turned intward, not seeing him look back at her, but dwelling on his philosophy on life. She understood it... yes, she certainly did. But hearing it said it so many words, laid bare to examination, she had to wonder suddenly. Was it enough? Was it enough for her to dally with stallions and then set them free... set herself free, morelike.
But now she looked forward in time, to her own future. Dismayed, she saw herself alone, bereft of lasting love, though not friendless by any means. Still, mothers would avoid her and her loose ways, while enjoying the company of dedicated stallions. She tended to laugh off such dedication, but seeing Guilian so easily set aside a mare who apprently felt she needed him... it frightened her, down deep.
Her eyes refocused on him, and for a moment that fright and desolation of her own future shone clearly through. But his eyes, so calm in their dismissal of commitment, caused her to immediately shutter her eyes, cutting off the window to her inner thoughts. He would never be the sort to understand... to sympathise... to care about her doubts and her future.
She heaved a sigh and shrugged her shoulders, mane sliding across them in a silky whisper. "If you say so, Guilian." She meant it to be playful an careless, but it came out as a dull sigh. Realizing this, she knew she'd need to explain a bit further, so he didn't think he had two females trying to bind him. "I understand your perspective all too well, as I'm sure you know." Stallions talked, after all... they knew an easy catch and shared the knowledge. Somehow it was losing its thrill for her.
"And besides," she added with a more successful attempt at being light-hearted. "Who would want to be tied to that belligerent nag anyway?" Despite her sincere amusement at her own image of Izusa, her smile was touched with sadness.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:42 pm
In one sense, it was a delightful thing to be told by a mare that she understood. However, Guilian was no untried youth, accepting a mare's words at face value. In his lifetime, he'd had to read actions, faces, suggestions and innuendo. And it didn't take a skilled stallion or even a knowledgable one to tell when something is wrong.
The resigned tone to her sigh and the sadness in her smile were enough to set off alarm bells for the stallion, and he couldn't disregard that upset. Frowning slightly, Guilian stepped back over to the mare, draping a wing over her back and holding her against his side. "Chica...what is it that troubles you about what I said? Do you feel I have mislead you?"
Just because he lived a rather hedonistic lifestyle didn't mean he couldn't care about other things, after all. And strange as it might seem, he actually felt for his mare companions beyond mere lust.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:53 pm
Willingly she leaned against his side, tucking her nose under his jaw and taking comfort in his outstretched wing. She heaved a soft sigh and was honest with him. "I am having trouble seeing myself this way years hence." She paused and let another breath out in a soft huff of sadness. "I live as you do. I ask for nothing in return from those stallions I am with. But what does it leave me in the end?"
Her hide twitched, as if irritated or cold. Her eyes were faraway before she closed them against the future she still saw so clearly. "It will leave me alone in my old age, that's what. Left adrift among families and bonded couples, who are able to give each other strength when times are tough."
She opened her eyes again and tilted her head to look up at him. "My life has been nothing but sunshine and pleasure. But I must admit that it cannot go on forever. And when the day comes when only a mate would stand by me in times of trouble, what am I to do? I will endure the trials on my own." She tucked her chin and leaned her head against his neck again. "And I don't think I am strong enough for that. It would be like a butterfly in a snowstorm."
It did not seem to her that he was being duplicitous, caring but not commiting. She truly accepted him for how he was, and would never ask for anything more than he offered. It did not cross her mind to ask for more, to seek beyond that which he willingly gave. His comfort was welcome, to be sure, but she would not have expected it, nor mourned the lack of it. It wasn't his responsibility to look after her, after all. It was noone's responsibility at all.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:08 pm
Tilting his head to one side, Guilian gently rested his cheek on Luca's head, the gesture simple and purely considerate; for an outsider witnessing the interaction between the two, it might be hard to believe that the two Soqs were a pair known in their own ways for being utterly commited rakehells. However, there were times when other feelings were evident and even expressible.
Like right now. Listening to Luca talk, Guilian couldn't help the slight twinge of sadness that crossed his face. Settlement, provision, family...all these things sounded familiar, as indeed they were. He'd heard them all before after all...it seemed as though mares often worried about such things.
It wasn't that he'd never thought of old age. However, when he thought of old age it was with the smug knowledge of a well-earned retirement. He planned on enjoying the relationships he'd built as a young stallion (with less of a sexual element), but otherwise not really changing things.
It didn't seem as though Luca shared that view, though, and for a brief bit that saddened him.
"You know, Chica, just because you don't have a mate doesn't mean you are doomed to be alone. There is always the possibility of children, of strong friendships, of other connections that last past one's prime..."
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:21 pm
She leaned so she could look soberly into his eyes again. "Do relationships really mean that little to you, in the end? Do you not long for someone who matches you perfectly... who understands everything you say, the reasons why you do what you do?" She shook her head with a noisy breath blown out her nostrils and stomped a single hoof.
"Dalliance is all well and good, while I am young. But what stallion wants a mare so often enjoyed by other stallions?" Pain welled in her voice at that, though she spoke softly. "When age comes upon me, and my colors fade to a more mellow shade, what will draw the stallions to me? Why would they care by then, settled with their meek mares to bear them foals?" She shook her head, her curls tangling with his.
"No, do not placate me with tales of whimsy and easy solutions. I know my future, for it stares at me clearly, through your very own eyes. They may say they love me, but you and I, we know differently. It isn't true love. It isn't the real thing that remains, that lasts, even when the bloom of youth has withered and gone. No, they and you simply lust after my willing body." This wasn't said in an overly emotional tone, for she had accepted this fact. It was fine with her, for now. But it was the future that bothered her. "That is not enough, when I am old and the days are cold. Not enough at all." She let loose a deep sigh and leaned against him again, accepting the transitory comfort he offered, but feeling a deep echo of sadness that she would never be able to rely on anyone for such comfort.
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:33 pm
Smiling wryly, Guilian gently ran a wingtip along Luca's jaw. "I wish I could say something suitably comforting, Chica, but as I believe I have mentioned before, I don't believe that such 'love' truly exists. I love each mare I encounter, I enjoy my friendships with stallions and, yes, even the mares that I am techinically unsuccessful with. But do I beleive that somewhere out there is a mare who is 'destined' to be with me, and only me? No. Nor do I believe I could commit myself, even if such a mare DID exist."
In this one way, he could probably be sounted a cynic. Yet he'd never believed in the concept of love as an emotion, not even when he was young. Made it harder to relate, that was certain.
"And I think...that you are too hard on yourself, Chica. But if you feel that strongly...then you should do something about it, no? You can't change the past, but if you're worried about being old and alone, there's still time to do something about it."
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:46 pm
His way of thinking made things seem even lonelier. What hope was there for her if he was right? She'd bounce from stallion to stallion, only loved in the moment, and never in the long run. A single tear rolled down her cheek and she heaved a sigh.
But his words meant to comfort and encourage only made her feel uncharacteristically angry. Do something about it?! She snorted and stomped a hoof again, tossing her head to brush aside his stroking wing. "I should do something, should I? Take better care of myself, perhaps? Stay out of the stun to be sure my purple doesn't fade?" Her eyes lit with fire that helped banish the sensation of sadness and despair.
She stepped away from him, eyes flashing. "Or perhaps you mean I should hunt out some elderly stallion with bad hearing, who perhaps hasn't heard of Luca, the easy mare?" Her ears flicked backwards and her teeth bared. "Or is your idea that I find some homely stallion who couldn't stand up to a normal mare, someone who would just be happy to have a warm body next to him on cold nights, since noone ELSE will stay with him? Is that it?"
She was in a mighty froth now, pacing much more energetically than he had. "Just fling myself at some stallion in hopes he'll take pity on the loose lady who is all alone now?" Each hoof hit the ground with an indignant thud, and her tail swished mightily. So much for her being comforted.
"Well, Mr. Pessimist, you may not believe someone could care for you at all time and under any siutation, but i DO believe it is possible. One day you will wake up, wishing for a mare who could look after you when you are ill or injured, despite your mare-izing ways, and there will be noone there for you, because you didn't believe in it." She stood still now, challenging him with eyes and body language. "But you will realize it too late. Too late for any mare to care. Just like it's too late for me, even now." Her anger only dampened her sorrow, rather than entirely banishing it, but she fought it off, choosing instead to glare at the careless red stallion.
"Your affections are temporary, always. And I would never expect you to change. But you will regret it someday, Guilian. I promise you that. Because all the affections you have enjoyed will also be temporary. Someday you WILL be alone. And where will your pretty ideas of lust be then?"
And with that, she turned her back on him, trembling and heaving breaths that she hoped would press back the tears that threatened to fall. She would not break down in front of him!
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Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 5:58 pm
Guilian was often on the receiving end of female passions; however, those passions were usually not anger. It was a bit out of the ordinary, honestly...
And yet, at the same time it wasn't. He'd dealt with Izusa, after all, so comparitively this was nothing. Besides, he didn't doubt that Luca's anger wasn't aimed at him. Why would it, when he had done nothing unusual or atypical for him this whole meeting?
So he remained stoic, even in the fact of flat out beration. Once Luca had fallen silent, though, he stepped up yet again.
"Correct me if I'm wrong, Chica, but I don't believe I ever said any such thing. And you are doing yourself a disservice if you believe what you are saying yourself."
Tossing back his curls, he moved closer to Luca, though once again giving her her space. He simply wanted to be heard, to be understood, nothing more.
"If you believe in love, Chica, you should seek it out. And not out of pity or despair, either, but out of belief. Why do you short sell yourself so? You have been free with your favors, perhaps, but those stallions that would cast judgement for such would have no business calling themselves true males. You need to seek out those that will appreciate you for what you have to offer besides your body, Chica, if that is what you want. Why commite to an ideal if you won't commit all the way?"
The jabs at himself he ignored; it wasn't like he'd never been told he'd be old and alone before, and had it bugged him then? No. Did it bug him now? Still no.
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