Welcome to Gaia! ::

i was in life issues when someone told me about this guild and thought i could get more info here heart

this is what i wrote:
this is a mule because i have Rl friends on gaia who don't know i'm gay...well no one but my dog knows i'm gay

i am a junior in high school right now and 16 years old, anyways i'm feeling like its time i let some people know that i am gay, but want to get some feedback from teens about how they did it, who they told first, that sort of thing. i hate the gay stereotype tho and don't want that. i feel like a normal teen, not an interior decorator, or that gay theatre guy. (not in theatre, but help with some set stuff) i hate it when people say things like, "hey do you know ___insert name___?", o yea that gay guy i know him. being gay is one part of my life and right now something no one knows about me, and for a lot of people have no business knowing. (straits don't come up to me telling me that they are heterosexuals so why should i?)

i've done the whole strait thing, had a few girlfriends, gone to dances, (went to prom my sophomore year ) without any luck, but it was fun. i don't think i want to date guys in high school just because of the stigma and there isn't a big gay group at my school that i know of. i just don't know if i can deal with the whole gay thing in high school right now, but a part of me really wants to tell my best friend (a girl), but once i say those two words (i'm gay) i can't turn back and do the fake strait thing anymore. i want to have some of those memories. i don't know i'm rambling and confused. any help here or any links to gay teen sites (not porn or hookup sites) would be loved. thanks

there is a thread here about the sites, vague posted it i think, and as for the stereotypes, you don't have to fit into them, I am a fairly non-fem, most people wouldn't know by looking at me, I do however have fun with fashion and interior decorating. And as for there being a group, gays in high school, from my experience, typically do not hang out in one group, they usually are spread out, some know of others, some know none. I knew of a few...

The lack of unified gay groups is where all the communities are heading. We're too diverse to be completely unified by just our orientation, hence the creation of a GLBT culture.

I agree, you shouldn't let the stereotypes govern you. True, I'm an aspiring artist, and perhaps me being gay had some hand in that, but I'm just following where I lead myself. Identifying who you are does not require a great party thrown in the honour of flaunting sexual orientation and you don't have to stand on street corners shouting it to the world. What matters is that the people close to you know and understand, or even on a more basic level, deal with it as something that is non-issue to yourself. You shouldn't feel forced to do anything, just be who you are. Shouldn't that be good enough for everyone?

If you're looking for coming out stories there one or two threads floating around here somewhere. 3nodding

i think she is...we've known each other since preschool (not always friends, but you get the idea) and we've talked about homosexuality before. (right about when all the gay marrage hype was going on) i think shes on a ledge tho, she seems to change her mind on it often, but she is in drama (lead role in the upcoming play, Lady Macbeth, i'm so proud of her) and is around a few gay guys, she even went to the first GSA meeting this year. i'm more worried about her friend and my friend who is a guy. they dated broke up but he still loves her and has a funny was of brainwashing her, he'll be a good polition some day. he's anti gay eveything and i think it has rubbed off on her stare
really tho i'm not to scared telling her, just the fact that i can never go back. another funny thing about it is she told me this guy i've thought was cute was bi and i've been thinking about him a lot heart , but she has a crush on him sweatdrop . i'm more scared of that, but i don't think i'll date in high school

@Keithing- thank you i fully agree. i myself hope to have a job in art someday (probably not, i'm not that great)

thanks Asthmaboy heart

Well. I've been fortunate that I personally have received little backlash from my coming out. There were a few people, but for the most part I'm a well liked person and people have defended me when I am attacked verbally.

But I do report any direct harassment to the principal if it occurs and ASAP.

Being gay isn't about limp-wrists or a lithp or being a flaming bonfire of gaydom like Jack Macfarland (God bless his little gay bum for being so ridiculous.)

It's about you, a boy, being attracted to and someday falling in love with another boy. I myself fit the stereotypes in ways that often give people the sense that they know what I'm like, so it shocks them when I talk about my father and me going to practice shooting or that my aspiration in life is not to become a designer or a porn star but to become a nurse and a father.

Also, it is very, very lonely being openly gay in most high schools. You will be markedly different, because not only will you feel different inside but everyone will be able to put a name to that and people WILL treat you differently because of it. Some people will fear you, others will scorn and jeer at you, but I find that many decent people will respect you for your honesty. Some people will think you are really brave for coming out, and you will gain their admiration.

At my old school, I had lots of respect from guys because girls were always coming up to me and hugging me and hanging on me because everyone knew I wasn't about to try and grope them. xd It was really shocking when I learned this, and it has amused me since.

So, in short, there are good things about coming out and there are bad things. When I came out, it was an act of desperation. I couldn't stand being in the closet any longer, it was killing me inside. I feel that if I hadn't come out, I wouldn't be the person I am today - A person I'm rather fond of.

So if you feel like that, ask your best friend if she'd be your best friend even if you were gay. If she says no, and asks why just say "Oh, because I was thinking about it and I'd still be your friend if you were." or the like - make up your own reason if it sounds plausible. But if you feel like you've got to let someone know, then let someone know in the safest way you can possibly arrange.

Welcome, I'm the Captain of this guild, I hope you'll enjoy your time here.
We actually hav e acouple threads about coming out already, so you might look for those and read through them.
I'll tell you this: I just got sick of pretending and said "to Hell with it". I came out and never looked back. And no one was ever dumb enough to ******** with me. I really couldn't care less if the cowards said things behind my back. The freedom was incredible.

People tend to overcomplicat things like this, come out, you'll get s**t for it, but if people have problemwith it ******** them