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 Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 5:10 pm
Only Nerpin and Rynn please! Thanks!
Ianios landed on the park bench in the middle of the small park near Nerpin's dorm. He hoped Arith would arrive soon. He had so much to talk to her about...namely Celaien. He looked around, hoping to spy the white feien. He was so upset, so torn over Cel's becoming a gemstone. And Arith was one he trusted. He didn't think any of the others would understand.
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 5:54 pm
Waltzing through the park, Arith came fully ready to tackle anything related to height. That is.. for climbing anyways. With her cloak draped over her not-so-perfect wings - she looked around for the feien who had asked of her recently, hoping to spot the taller feien.
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 6:05 pm
Ianios blinked, seeing Arith headed his way. But she was walking? Why? "Arith!" he cried, waving to her. He flew down, landing on the ground.
He rushed over, hugging her tightly. "Thank you for coming...I needed to talk to someone so bad..."
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 6:29 pm
A loud seething sound came between the younger feien's teeth as Ianios attempted to seek comfort with her. Any other given day she would have accepted it, but tonight was an exception.
The poor feien stiffened up and did an elegant dance, quickly exiting the tight hug that Ianios had jumped on her, frowning softly a bit, but allowing that to slip quietly, opening the cape slightly to check the damage made to her allready wrecked feathered plumes. Looking to Ianios carefully, she sighed lightly and shook her head, giving him a worried glance - her pain wasn't as important right now as his problem at hand, and tilted her head softly.
"I heard something wrong had come down the last few days, and it seems to have taken a toll on you. So what's been up dear Ia?" She inquired, curious and slightly worried about the dishevelled look on him.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 3:26 pm
Ianios heard the hissing sound from Arith, and when she pulled back, he looked her over. Had he hurt her? He hadn't meant too. Lord...that's all he was good for. He hurt others, now he was broken himself. He sighed, sitting down under the bench.
The night air was cool, stirring his hair. It felt nice, almost like Cel was ruffling it. He looked to her, willing himself not to cry. Everything was reminding him of his beloved Celaien.
"Celaien died...that's his gemstone in the window at the shop..." he finally said, feeling totally broken.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 4:03 pm
Seeing the reaction on poor Ianios' face as she slowly had backed away startled Arith a bit. Looking down at the long cloak around her shoulders, she just whispered a "Don't worry, you didn't hurt my intentionally. It's complicated, sorry Ia." with a shuffle of her feet. She felt bad about aching at a time of need, but she lifted her head again to view the younger feien as he muttered his morose.
"I had heard that we lost a feien in the neighbourhood, but I truely did not expect it to be Celaien..." she stated as she slowly put a hand on the shoulder of the younger - yet taller - green hued feien. "Sounds like your taking it really badly dear.."
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 4:15 pm
Ianios looked up at Arith, blinking. "How would you feel if it had been someone you loved deeply?" he snapped. "It wasn't a fling with him...it had deepen since I let him decide. We enjoyed each other's company, just being together, not talking was so nice..." He sighed, bringing his knees up, holding them and dropping his head.
"None of you know what it's like...to lose someone you love..." He groaned, rocking slightly as if in pain. "Slight chance of getting him back, but that's up to the gods, if there is any..."
The tears flowed freely again. He had sought comfort but it seemed like a bad idea now. Aria did all she could, but it wasn't enough. Would there ever be?
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 4:40 pm
Arith looked away briefly as the younger feien had a minor explosion in her direction, a result of the honest and harmless statement. She gave a grave sigh, attempting to forget about the gap of time she had to endure between seeing the feien closest to her, and decided to sit next to Ianios.
"It's not as uncommon as you think, my dear Ia - missing the one who you cherish the most." she stated as she draped the long cloak off her back, exposing her damaged and distressed wings, with feathers missing everywhere. Wincing slightly, she lifted them to a point before sitting down, draping the cloak on her wings and back again, giving a sigh as she looked over to him once more.
"I know a few feien who have lost what they once loved dear, your not the only one. But your situation really sounds like it aches deep inside." she stated as-a-matter-of-factly, but her emerald eyes said more as she took some of her cloak to wipe his face of tears. "You need.. maybe to get out into the world.. take a small 'finding yourself' journey - away from the feien - like Shux did. You may feel at ease when you come back - with or without Cel..." she trailed off, before finishing, putting the cloak down,"He was your one and only, possibly, but because he's gone - does not mean that he isn't watching over you anymore hun.. even without the gem. You may even find someone again.. you shouldn't just forget about love and caring for others.. would Cel want that?" she posed to him, feeling for him deeply.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 5:20 pm
"I know...but how many have seen their loved ones after they've died?" Ianios asked honestly. He looked over to Arith, his sapphire eyes searching her face. "Others can miss their loved ones, but they can go back and see them...I go to see Cel...and find..." He trailed off, rubbing his fists into his eyes.
Would she ever know how much it hurt? How it felt to have your heart torn from your chest, the ache that hurt so much, that you'd do anything to end it? Somehow he doubted it. Her cloak was soft as she wiped away tears, and he could briefly see her wings. She was molting, something thankfully he never had to go through. He was sorry she was, she had pretty wings. Pretty wings like Celaien had.
Thinking of the heat Feien made him sigh again. Arith's words rang in his head. A 'finding himself' journey. He wouldn't even know where to begin. As for finding himself without Cel...he didn't know if he could bare that. It wouldn't be right, like he had forgotten him. He never wanted to forget him, he couldn't dishonor his memory like that.
But Cel wouldn't want him not to care for others, it was his very nature. But as for finding love...Ian had no idea if he could again. Would Cel even want him too? Fresh tears rolled down his cheeks again, his mind mulling over such. It hurt to think on Cel, and he didn't want to forget him. But loving another was such a big step. He didn't know if he'd ever be able too.
"I guess not, but Arith..." He trailed off, using his hands to wipe his face of the tears before they dripped off his chin. "I don't know if I could love another." At least he was honest. It would be dishonoring his memory, in Ian's eyes.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 6:06 pm
Arith gave a tiny chuckle at the younger feien's statement "It's been said that some do see the spiritual remains of the ones they really loved, but that's not really possible" she stated, shaking the thought away as she heard the next sentance "I doubt it's possible sometimes, like forbidden loves and whatnot."
Looking over to him, she shook her head softly at the pitiful view she had of him. Here was a strong feien - or as strong as she could remember - broken down to a curled up wreck, due to the loss of a loved one. This was her first time in the situation, but she was determined to help him if she could. No one should think wrongly about themself. "I think.. even though your probably thinking against it, you should take the break I instigated dear Ianios.. the loss of Cel has taken quite a toll on you, and I think you need a break from the commune." she started, looking at the sidewalk from the spot that the two feien were residing in.
"I don't mean to sound harsh or forceful, but I'm saying this as a friend. I know you hurt so much because of Cel's passing - but I think it would be more of an insult for you to stop loving and caring about feien in the future like you did Cel." she started, offering her cloak once more towards him, smiling a bit as she looked off again, "You loved Cel, and he died due to reasons not pertaining to you. Now you obviously hurt deep down inside.. but I think Cel would feel right if you found someone who made you happy.. once more. It would be saddening to his soul if you just sulked about a lost love, and shut yourself off completely dear. It would just be wrong to deny future possibilities.." She finished, with a nod. No one should deny love, even if it wronged them once prior.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 6:32 pm
Ian nodded. What she said made sense. A lot of sense. Celaien wouldn't want him to hurt forever, he realized. But a break...he wouldn't even know where to go. And how would he find himself? Could he force himself to stay away?
He leaned on Arith when she offered the cloak. He listened to her words, weighting them inside. Part of him knew she was right, but the other half felt like he'd betray Cel if he ever found another to love. Would Celaien want him to love again? Would it make him happy? Or jealous? Death had cheated them out of each other, their future.
Ianios' head hurt, trying to figure out what Cel would have wanted. Ian knew if he had passed, he would want Cel to move on, find another to love, to cherish. And slowly Ian was realizing Cel would have wanted the same. He had let Ian go to decide between him and Nero. And he had come back to Celaien.
"I guess you're right..." Ianios looked to his friend, trying to smile slightly for her. "But Arith, I don't want to forget Cel...ever..."
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 6:50 pm
Arith have a half smile as she nodded, looking up at the darkened overcast sky, the same sky that's been around the city for the last few days. Hearing the statement from Ianios, she shook her head, and was reminded of something that the real Nerpin had told her during the summer when they went to see him and his girl.
"A wise man told me once, that you never can forget your first love." she started, looking to him, carefully, "It's almost impossible - you can try, but your mind always rewinds to the first person you cherished as something higher than a friend.." she then have a breathed chuckle "Of course that wise man was happy his first ex was gone.. but that's not what's important.. what's important is Cel will ALWAYS have a place deep in your heart - even if you find someone who you cherish, even if it's more than Cel." She finished, nodding sagely.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:10 pm
Ianios nodded. Of course what her wise man said made sense. He knew Cel would remain in his heart. "Thank you, Arith," He said softly, slipping his arm under her cloak, under her wings to hug her gently. "I knew you'd help me." He blushed slightly. "Sorry about snapping at you..."
He hadn't meant too, but at the time it felt right. And he hoped she knew it was in the heat of the moment that caused him to do it. He smiled at her. "It's getting late, perhaps we should head home."
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:19 pm
Giving the younger feien a light pat on the head, she stood up, looking out athe the long walk she was about to take, nodding to him. "It would be a wise plan - seeming as I have to walk all the way back to my house.. which may take me awhile."
Looking down at him, she nodded and gave a minut wave "Don't forget what I said Ia.. I'll see ya around" and she was off.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:22 pm
Ianios watched Arith go, getting up himself. He wished her a safe journal home, then turning, flew home himself, thoughts of the whole conversion flowing through his mind.
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