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New story coming soon
  'Bout Damn Time
  Will this one get updated?
  ******** you MARCUS!!! ~Maniacle laughter~
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SESauvie

Girl-Crazy Businesswoman

PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:05 pm


Chapter Archive


Chapter 11: Mind Games


Walking around the Cult Headquarters as if nothing ever happened, Fish was looking for someone… anyone, the halls were empty, and the rooms were empty. Everything was empty. “What in the hell is going on here?” Fish said, in a confused fashion, but got no reply from anyone to his obvious dismay and utter confusion. Walking in the hall that lead to the infirmary, he slowly and suddenly began to open his mouth with a booming yell the words “Skitty!, Draken, Trenn… anyone!” but to no success he then tried yelling many other cultie names at random for any possible success “LF, Masamune?!” but still nothing came back. As he neared the infirmary he heard noises coming from the room “Maybe someone is in there, noises can’t be made by nothing” he said wishfully and as he opened the door all he saw was a curtain where the beds usually were.

Now feeling a devastating chill down his spine he neared the curtain slowly building up the courage to open it and with a quick breath he grabbed it and swung it open. As he progressively started to realize what was being seen he started to feel his voice leave him, he felt is entire body shake as he noticed a blanket. What really caught his attention though was the small screen to his right nothing special anywhere else, but when you see a blanket and a monitor that only has one singular line on it in a hospital room your mind races. If any normal person was in this situation there mind would send them away from it, but Fish’s mind, no it had other ideas. “Please no…” he said as he slowly began to raise the blanket, his thoughts were rushing with one thought “Not her, not her, not her, not her” and as he lifted the corner what he saw was simply bizarre. Lying there in the bed without any traces of life was Fish himself just… staring straight up into the eyes of himself, Fish though was seemingly unaffected by this, he started walking to the door and started Laughing before saying “Okay who is ******** with me, I am not dead yet” in an absolutely cocky voice to match his smile.

Still smiling Fish started to loose his footing and fell, and as he did, everything went white with the exception of himself and two silhouettes. Noticing them Fish had one thing on his mind… “Great more nut jobs… I don’t suppose you could tell me where I am, or who you are ?” The eyes of the smaller silhouette started glowing red out of no where and he stated “Nice guess” with a quick chuckle afterward, His outline for a person was outlandishly simple, he almost seemed to be a ball of energy with eyes, as for the other he was the outline of a man who appeared to have four sheaths on his back all containing swords. “What do you want” Fish yelled aimlessly and it was met by an immediate response “Nothing regarding you, you’re nothing of importance at the moment. You are wondering why we messed with your head for sure, and I will admit that it was only for the fun of striking fear into the powerful leader of the cult” the man said with the red eyed man adding “So long”. Trying to let out any speech Fish just slowly deteriorated into the background with so much as a whimper.

Twenty nine hours after being stung by the armoured space pirate a great yell was heard all around the entire HQ Gonbe Screaming “Fish is waking up! He is waking up!” With that all of the culties that were in the station started running to the origin of the scream, poor Geno got run over by a rushing mob of hurrying culties. Because of Gonbe and her locking the door nobody was allowed entry of the room. Trying to regain his vision as he was doing this he asked Gonbe “what hit me?” as Gonbe was smiling in relief she said “You are not going to like the irony, but you were poisoned by a Meta pirate” opening his eyes wide he said “damn it I was bested in my own name category” looking very annoyed. “Where is Skitty by the way?” were the first words that came out of his mouth after wiping the look off of his face. Gonbe with a look of neutrality let out “She had gotten so mentally exhausted that she decided to take a breather by going back home for a little while, now are you okay?” Fish looking at the hoard of people on the other side of the door he said “Yeah” with a smile and got up out of the bed, unfortunately he fell right onto his face and with a laugh he worded “heh, sorry my legs are asleep”
PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:14 pm


Pretty good so far.

LifelessFawkes


Tatsuman

Dapper Genius

PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:14 pm


How many Cult stories are we up to now? xd
Anyway, it's a nice start. I don't have any name suggestions though.
PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:19 pm


its cool.

Xilo The Odd


Meta_Fish
Captain

PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 7:18 pm


It's well written, the only real thing I could suggest is writing it in Microsoft Word, so that it checks all spellings and grammatical errors.
PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 7:21 pm


thanks I was hoping for a positive reception
@Fish yeah sorry about that I had to type it out quickly and forgot about Word having the help

SESauvie

Girl-Crazy Businesswoman


Seaphron

PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 7:26 pm


Meta Fish
It's well written, the only real thing I could suggest is writing it in Microsoft Word, so that it checks all spellings and grammatical errors.
3nodding More or less what I said.
PostPosted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 7:28 pm


Seaphron
Meta Fish
It's well written, the only real thing I could suggest is writing it in Microsoft Word, so that it checks all spellings and grammatical errors.
3nodding More or less what I said.
I tried to edit it as much as possible

SESauvie

Girl-Crazy Businesswoman


Koosei

PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:47 am


Quote:
and even in this time of trouble he had two headphones on to calm him down…..with metal.
xd lol

xd methinks someone is still occupied with Metroid. just a little bit, anyways. but, it's a very good start. suspense is always fun to start out with. good thing Fish come through though. ... confused Trenn taking over after Fish might be kinda scary.
PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:53 am


Koosei
Quote:
and even in this time of trouble he had two headphones on to calm him down…..with metal.
xd lol

xd methinks someone is still occupied with Metroid. just a little bit, anyways. but, it's a very good start. suspense is always fun to start out with. good thing Fish come through though. ... confused Trenn taking over after Fish might be kinda scary.
you are the forth person to point out that line, Thank you and Trenn taking over is a scary thought isnt it?
And to be fair this chapter was written out before my new found Metroid addiction, and Koosei you will like the place in the story that you appear in mrgreen

SESauvie

Girl-Crazy Businesswoman


Diana Godstone

PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:57 am


As Meta fish and Seaphron said but all in all a good start.Not sure of a name though. xd
PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:03 am


Sauvie
Koosei
Quote:
and even in this time of trouble he had two headphones on to calm him down…..with metal.
xd lol

xd methinks someone is still occupied with Metroid. just a little bit, anyways. but, it's a very good start. suspense is always fun to start out with. good thing Fish come through though. ... confused Trenn taking over after Fish might be kinda scary.
you are the forth person to point out that line, Thank you and Trenn taking over is a scary thought isnt it?
And to be fair this chapter was written out before my new found Metroid addiction, and Koosei you will like the place in the story that you appear in mrgreen
:Xd yeah. very scary thought.
surprised I will? biggrin *perks up* any chance of a hint?

Koosei


SESauvie

Girl-Crazy Businesswoman

PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:07 am


Koosei
Sauvie
Koosei
Quote:
and even in this time of trouble he had two headphones on to calm him down…..with metal.
xd lol

xd methinks someone is still occupied with Metroid. just a little bit, anyways. but, it's a very good start. suspense is always fun to start out with. good thing Fish come through though. ... confused Trenn taking over after Fish might be kinda scary.
you are the forth person to point out that line, Thank you and Trenn taking over is a scary thought isnt it?
And to be fair this chapter was written out before my new found Metroid addiction, and Koosei you will like the place in the story that you appear in mrgreen
:Xd yeah. very scary thought.
surprised I will? biggrin *perks up* any chance of a hint?
a hint.... Maybe allthough if my computer isnt being used I should have a new chapter up by friday or saterday
PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:09 am


Sauvie
Koosei
Sauvie
Koosei
Quote:
and even in this time of trouble he had two headphones on to calm him down…..with metal.
xd lol

xd methinks someone is still occupied with Metroid. just a little bit, anyways. but, it's a very good start. suspense is always fun to start out with. good thing Fish come through though. ... confused Trenn taking over after Fish might be kinda scary.
you are the forth person to point out that line, Thank you and Trenn taking over is a scary thought isnt it?
And to be fair this chapter was written out before my new found Metroid addiction, and Koosei you will like the place in the story that you appear in mrgreen
:Xd yeah. very scary thought.
surprised I will? biggrin *perks up* any chance of a hint?
a hint.... Maybe allthough if my computer isnt being used I should have a new chapter up by friday or saterday
biggrin awesome

Koosei


Silver Skull

PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:24 am


Nice start.
I'm liking all of the characters up to now, except that Masamune guy he's a jerk. wink
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