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 Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 9:15 pm
Okay first I would like to state that I am not actually male but this is my mule and so I can by boy clothes when I need 'em this is what this is here for. Second the reason my mule is in the guild is because my boyfriend for some reason wouldn't like the idea of me being in a sex/pregnancy guild.
Me and my boyfriend have been having emotional issues since we found out I was pregnant and even before we did. Now that I'm pregnant though it's alot worse. I'm I think in my 7th month. My boyfriend seems to put all his needs before mine. If he's mad he yell's at me even when I had nothing to do with it or just doesn't talk to me at all and with holds affection from me just cause he isn't happy. He get's mad at me for getting mad at him and screams at me or say's I put my need's before his.
He's cheated on me, lied to me several times, and left me at one point when I accused him on cheating on me ((when we got back togther he admitted the cheating)) He made me change school's so he could still go to school with out people knowing I'm pregnant and now instead of seeing me he hang's out with a teacher after school everyday which I am starting to suspect might not be true. Me and him have no personal time togther to really talk this through since his parents won't let us in the same room togther with out supervision. So we can't talk togther, we don't get the naps we used to get togther or the cuddle time, and we haven't had sex making everything more tense.
What should I do?
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 9:53 pm
Um, you shouldn't be his girlfriend.
NO PART of that relationship sounds healthy enough for me to even suggest tips for salvaging it.
Don't be with him if he lies to you, cheats on you, can't accept when you're upset, and is STILL lying to you. You do realize no part of that is a GOOD relationship, right?
Secondly... you said, "I think I'm in my 7th month."
Have you been to a freakin' doctor? You'd know exactly where you were if you had. If you haven't... well, look into putting your baby up for adoption, because it doesn't seem you're in ANY place to be having a child.
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 10:01 pm
Savina Um, you shouldn't be his girlfriend. NO PART of that relationship sounds healthy enough for me to even suggest tips for salvaging it. Don't be with him if he lies to you, cheats on you, can't accept when you're upset, and is STILL lying to you. You do realize no part of that is a GOOD relationship, right? Secondly... you said, "I think I'm in my 7th month." Have you been to a freakin' doctor? You'd know exactly where you were if you had. If you haven't... well, look into putting your baby up for adoption, because it doesn't seem you're in ANY place to be having a child.
He isn't still lying to me or at least I don't think so. It's been a lot better since christmas but I guess it's still hard. I just want advice on how, if, I can make it better. I would like to try for the baby.
I'm not sure if I'm 7th month exactly or I'm at the end of my sixth. I went to my doctor a bit ago and I'm seeing my doctor this or next week. I have to re-schedule for testing. I refuse to put the baby up for adoption. I don't want him wondering why he was put up for adoption and thinking I didn't love him and I don't want to alway's wonder if he's being treated right.
Plus the boyfriends dad is very happy to be a grandpa and wouldn't let me either.
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Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 10:56 pm
he sounds like a complete a**.
i'm sorry, my husband grew up with out a father and hes ...never wanted to know him cause what he put his mother through.
So "leaving the baby with out a father" sometimes can be one of the best things for the kid.
Trust me it was in my husbands situation...his father was very controlling and a very angry person.
Why the hell would you change schools? What does that have todo with anything? why would he stuff you aside and continue to live his life.
He should no longer be thinking about "His" life. its yalls life now.
Your life will NEVER be the same, why would...you feel like you should be stuffed aside as the pregnant freak? What do your friends think of this? Your parents? What do they think of his actions?
If his dad is so happy about being a grandfather why won't they let yall talk alone? I mean, your already pregnant. Its not like yall could get pregnant again lol ya know? You need to talk to him..you need to be able to as well.
Mood swings..are very very common. You need to be able to cry and be loved during that time. This should be a happy time for you, im sorry its ...not turning out that way.
Also, it bothers me as well.....why don't you know exactly what week your in? Most mothers-to-be do....
I also know people who have been put up for adoption. They were left on a door step of a orphanage..and they know it was the best thing that ever happened to them. They have such a great life now, that they even thank their birth mother for making that big sacrafice for them.
I know you probably dont want todo that...but honestly babe i have to some what agree with savina, it doesn't sound like your int he best position to have a baby.
Now, I also know during that stage of pregnancy you arn't always in your right mind most of the time. Hormones are running like mad crazy which is fine...but...i dont know ...maybe its not a good idea for the father to be involved in the life of this baby.
You either need to stand up for yourself as the mother of your child. Make a happy life for it, rather then be thrown around by a a** of a father.
or smack some sense into him. Really..I would smack some sense into him.
All in all, how old are you darlin? are you sure your really ready for that much responciblity to have a baby?
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 12:12 am
Angelwings1922 All in all, how old are you darlin? are you sure your really ready for that much responciblity to have a baby? Profile says she's 13.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 8:11 am
Where are you parents and their involvement in all this?
I think really, your first priority needs to be YOU and the BABY, not this sham of a relationship. Screams abusive and controlling, extremely unhealthy to the baby.
And the line "Leave the baby without a father" is the WORST reason to stay together. I can guarantee there are a LARGE group of people who will tell you that the parents who stuck together just for the sake of children had problems. A child can still have a father and you two not be together.
If you have emotional issues, you need to be talking to your OB about that and make sure you are not at risk for PPD.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 12:13 pm
I'm going to have to agree with lunashock that "leave the baby without a father" IS the worst reason to stay together. I have a really close friend who had a baby 8 months ago. At the begining the father seemed to be really into it, loving and supportive. As it went on, he seemed to care about his friends more, and not so much the baby or the mother to be. After the baby was born he decided the whole father role wasnt for him and got into a different relationship insted. Now, all guys are different, but the father of my friend's baby seemed alot better than your boyfriend, so what makes you think he's even going to stick around for your kid? After the baby is born it is YOUR job to make the decisions not for yourself anymore, but for your baby. You need to think about that.
Plus, i grew up without a father (he died when i was young) and I am perfectly fine. I know it's a different circumstance, but you should never just assume people without fathers are any worse off than people with them. As long as your a good mother it shouldn't matter.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 12:42 pm
Nikolita Angelwings1922 All in all, how old are you darlin? are you sure your really ready for that much responciblity to have a baby? Profile says she's 13. oh my lord, im sorry, no wonder the father is being an a** and his parents are being that controlling. There is no way for you guys to make a life here if your that young...neither of you can even have a job yet...wow..ok.. i totally agree with every one who has responded here...Charity you need to make the right choice for the kid and you here, Not the father.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:10 pm
Uh,first people i would like to remind you all that she said it's a MULE so the info in the profile are most likely to be false.
Second,i myself,have lived all my life with only my mother,my father left her when he learned she was pregnant and like you,she didn't gave up on having the baby and today i am a really happy teenager,i love my mom very much and all,so think about it,if your boyfriend is so hot tempered and it's make you and your baby in danger,you should do what's best for it and get away from such a bad aura.
But yea anyway,it's only ours advices, i don't really think you'll listen.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:23 pm
KajiMadoushi Uh,first people i would like to remind you all that she said it's a MULE so the info in the profile are most likely to be false.
Second,i myself,have lived all my life with only my mother,my father left her when he learned she was pregnant and like you,she didn't gave up on having the baby and today i am a really happy teenager,i love my mom very much and all,so think about it,if your boyfriend is so hot tempered and it's make you and your baby in danger,you should do what's best for it and get away from such a bad aura.
But yea anyway,it's only ours advices, i don't really think you'll listen.
He's not hot tempered at all though. He yell's at me but he's never hit me never even hit anybody at school before yet I have been suspended twice. I admit I am a wee bit hot tempered but I'm doing my best to get my temper down. I wasn't hot tempered real bad intill around pregnancy just mood swing's I guess. :3
I'm going to try and talk to him first. But if all fail's I guess I have no choice.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:27 pm
Angelwings1922 Nikolita Angelwings1922 All in all, how old are you darlin? are you sure your really ready for that much responciblity to have a baby? Profile says she's 13. oh my lord, im sorry, no wonder the father is being an a** and his parents are being that controlling. There is no way for you guys to make a life here if your that young...neither of you can even have a job yet...wow..ok.. i totally agree with every one who has responded here...Charity you need to make the right choice for the kid and you here, Not the father.
I know but I'd like to maybe try to make it last a little longer. I know leaving the realtionship after a year and three month's sure as hell won't make me feel better or at least not for ahwhile.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:32 pm
loveswhiterose I'm going to have to agree with lunashock that "leave the baby without a father" IS the worst reason to stay together. I have a really close friend who had a baby 8 months ago. At the begining the father seemed to be really into it, loving and supportive. As it went on, he seemed to care about his friends more, and not so much the baby or the mother to be. After the baby was born he decided the whole father role wasnt for him and got into a different relationship insted. Now, all guys are different, but the father of my friend's baby seemed alot better than your boyfriend, so what makes you think he's even going to stick around for your kid? After the baby is born it is YOUR job to make the decisions not for yourself anymore, but for your baby. You need to think about that. Plus, i grew up without a father (he died when i was young) and I am perfectly fine. I know it's a different circumstance, but you should never just assume people without fathers are any worse off than people with them. As long as your a good mother it shouldn't matter.
There not I know that. But I want to try. Since the baby is also most likely a boy I want him to have a father figure. My dad isn't a very good one. Use to abuse me. I think Cruz would be a much better one.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:41 pm
lunashock Where are you parents and their involvement in all this? I think really, your first priority needs to be YOU and the BABY, not this sham of a relationship. Screams abusive and controlling, extremely unhealthy to the baby. And the line "Leave the baby without a father" is the WORST reason to stay together. I can guarantee there are a LARGE group of people who will tell you that the parents who stuck together just for the sake of children had problems. A child can still have a father and you two not be together. If you have emotional issues, you need to be talking to your OB about that and make sure you are not at risk for PPD.
To me being with Cruz feel's like it's right. Or I guess. I mean I just want our realtionship to be better. For me and the baby's sake. I'd really like the baby to have a father and I want some one there for me too. My parent's are there and all but it doesn't have the same feeling.
I know but it will be quite awhile before the baby would have a father again. And I guess it wouldn't feel the same.
If I might ask. What is PPD?
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 5:06 pm
Angelwings1922 he sounds like a complete a**. i'm sorry, my husband grew up with out a father and hes ...never wanted to know him cause what he put his mother through. So "leaving the baby with out a father" sometimes can be one of the best things for the kid. Trust me it was in my husbands situation...his father was very controlling and a very angry person. Why the hell would you change schools? What does that have todo with anything? why would he stuff you aside and continue to live his life. He should no longer be thinking about "His" life. its yalls life now. Your life will NEVER be the same, why would...you feel like you should be stuffed aside as the pregnant freak? What do your friends think of this? Your parents? What do they think of his actions? If his dad is so happy about being a grandfather why won't they let yall talk alone? I mean, your already pregnant. Its not like yall could get pregnant again lol ya know? You need to talk to him..you need to be able to as well. Mood swings..are very very common. You need to be able to cry and be loved during that time. This should be a happy time for you, im sorry its ...not turning out that way. Also, it bothers me as well.....why don't you know exactly what week your in? Most mothers-to-be do.... I also know people who have been put up for adoption. They were left on a door step of a orphanage..and they know it was the best thing that ever happened to them. They have such a great life now, that they even thank their birth mother for making that big sacrafice for them. I know you probably dont want todo that...but honestly babe i have to some what agree with savina, it doesn't sound like your int he best position to have a baby. Now, I also know during that stage of pregnancy you arn't always in your right mind most of the time. Hormones are running like mad crazy which is fine...but...i dont know ...maybe its not a good idea for the father to be involved in the life of this baby. You either need to stand up for yourself as the mother of your child. Make a happy life for it, rather then be thrown around by a a** of a father. or smack some sense into him. Really..I would smack some sense into him. All in all, how old are you darlin? are you sure your really ready for that much responciblity to have a baby?
Cruz isn't controlling or abusive. I'm much more controlling then he is. I got mad at him because a girl wrote happy valentine's day on his hand. I have jealousy issues.
I guess cause he want's to live it a little longer. I can give him that can't I? I guess I just want to try and give him what he want's or at least a little bit longer.
I guess your right but I just want to make him happy too. Which I guess isn't working. My friend's are fine with it if not a little freaked at first. My mom is pretty happy about being a grandmother though she feel's old and my dad is just sort of mellow I guess. He doesn't care but then again sort of does. My friend's think I should meet new people and my mom say's I'm being a little too controlling and my dad doesn't care.
His dad will but his mom won't. His mom stopped likeing me once I got boob's. X3. I guess his mom won't let us be alone cause the thought of us having sex is weird to her. I wish I could just stand up to Cruz's mom but his mom is scarey. XP
I know but I can't help but think the only reason I think something is wrong is because of the mood swing's and I just don't like bothering Cruz with any of it. We get to cry togther sometime's and it help's wonder's when we get to it's just horrible with his mom.
I got confused at first was why. I found out when I was 3 month's exactly and then I tried counting but I started jumping ahead so I thought I was like 6 month's at 4. And then I thought I was 5 month's and I am 7 now. ((I confirmed it was 7 month's. :3))
But baby's can be in an orphanage for a long time can't they. I would just feel so horrible doing that to the baby. And again Cruz's dad wouldn't allow it anyway.
And maybe it is. The only way to be sure is to have the baby and see if they get along. If Cruz make's a slip I guess the only thing to do would be to leave him. But I want to give them a chance togther.
If Cruz make's a mistake with the baby I will leave him for the babies sake but I really want them to have one chance togther at least.
X3 I got sense smacked into him and thing's are alot better then they were before christmas but I still want to try and make it better. For all of us not just me and the baby.
I think I'm ready. I've been changing diaper's since I was three. ((Three sisters)) I don't know if that really qualify's as ready but I want to try.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 6:52 pm
...it's not really something that you TRY,it's something that you DO.Taking care of a baby is not like taking care of a cat or a dog,it needs all your attention almost 24/7.
I think you're pretty courageous to want to have the baby at 13years old..am 18 and got pregnant a couple of months ago and even though i had a stable boyfriend,a job and money already in stock in the bank,i couldn't keep it cause i don't think i am mature and responsible enough yet...so,really,you're hot.That's all i can find to say.
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